Oh god, you put Kevin and Stan in this...  Anyways, hopefully you don't screw my part over too badly(though, knowing Geist, I still have to worry...).  Looks to be interesting 
 
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Argon Viper
IW COL Argon Viper{ret}
"History is on the move, those who cannot keep up will watch from a distance, and those who get in our way will not watch at all" - Grand Admiral Thrawn
"In combat, second place is only the last to die."- Anonymous
"Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses" - Carl G Jung

I see all the references, but I won't tell you them until I get the cookies.
 
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Corporal Tycho Celchu, Slicer
Dread Knights, Vast Empire's Stormtrooper Corps
Union Representative of the Dread Knights
[email protected]
AIM: Tycho987
ICQ: 110585444

The following is a work of fiction. Any resemblance between any existing characters or people is strictly coincidental, I swear! Besides, casting was largely out of my hands anyway, so its not my fault! This series does not edorse the activities portrayed herein, nor is it aimed at portraying anyone in particular, living or dead. No, really. After all, are we really here, or are we just the figment of a quantum physicist's imagination? VARNECK INHERITOR NERGAL (english dub) Episode 1/2: Tying up ends before they get loose It happened on Stormtrooper 1026's leave. That event that he didn't like to talk about, did his best to keep secret. The place he had visited had seemed harmless enough. A series of natural springs, used by martial artists for millenia for training. In its own way, it was serene, peaceful. That is, of course, until Stormie, knocked aside by a stampeding herd of ninja, fell into one of the springs. "Oh no!" the guide at the springs had said as Stormie was pulled out of the water. "That was most tragic cursed spring of drowned girl. Tragic story behind that one..." ***** Riel Fury stumbled into his home, three days after going missing. He still didn't know what had happened to him. Every now and then, when he closed his eyes, he saw flashes of his kidnappers, pale grey creatures with overlarge heads, huge and ominious black eyes, and few other features to speak of. He didn't know what they did to him, or where they took him. All he knew is that he needed a stiff drink. "DADDY!" a young woman sitting on the couch in his front room cried. She lept to her feet, vaulted some furniture, and embraced Riel Fury as though she hadn't seen him in days. Some part of Riel Fury's brain screamed that this was all wrong. This made no sense. This girl, no more than sixteen, squeezing the air out of his chest, this was... his daughter? "Oh daddy," the girl said as she hugged Riel Fury, "I was so worried about you..." He knew her, Riel finaly realized. This WAS his daughter. "Tina," he said to her, returning the hug in a moment of wholesome warmth that would make most dark jedi physically ill, "I'm home." ***** "Fifty cases of Glengary Black Label, as promised," Geist said to the chief Grey. The scrawny little alien and he were supervising the loading of the scotch into the saucer shaped spacecraft the Greys prefered. "I don't know where you could scare up that much Glengary Black Label, ole buddy," the chief Grey said, "I hope you didn't kill anyone I know." "Nope," Geist replied, deciding to leave it at that. The Greys were simple businessmen. They didn't care what their clients did, just as long as the scotch was paid in full on time. The chief Grey nodded. He and Geist had always had a good working relationship, even if Geist occasionally decided to handle his own pranks. As creative as the human could be, he knew that for the truly artful bounty-pranking, the big jobs, you always went with the Greys. They had millenia of experience with this sort of schtic, even before humans had begun to walk the stars. "Those were the days!" the chief Grey (his name was Wuyap, and he was several hundred thousand years old) said. "Back then we could get millions of people going just by buzzing Mexico city once or twice or knabing a farmboy out of an Iowa cornfield. Now everyone wants mindwipes and hydrospanners and gag human-alien hybrids. You know where it went wrong? When David Ducovny left X-files. After that, Aliens just weren't as sexy as they used to be. Gah, if I buzzed Mexico city now, I'd as likely be shot down as filmed." Geist just decided to nod in agreement. He didn't quite catch all the references the Grey was using, but then he wasn't several hundred thousand years old. "Did I tell you about that gag we pulled with the time machine?" Wuyap asked, then plunged on before Geist could respond, "We found this guy named George back in the good ole days and gave him a Coruscant junior high history book. To his death bed he claimed that he had come up with the whole thing himself! Everyone though he was some kind of creative genius, but really he was just this guy who liked to sue people. You wouldn't believe how much scotch he paid us to get..." "Yeah, I know," Geist said. "You told me this one. So how did the job go?" "Like a charm," Wuyap said. "We fed him the false memories while he was drunk." Contrary to myth, Grey abductions didn't actually involve hideous experimentation, but rather just rampant drinking parties using liquor refined over several hundred thousand years of careful work. The alchohol didn't so much make a person drunk as beat his brain into submisssion. The probes, scanners, and implants that everyone always remembered were just party favors. "So eventually he'll figure out his daughter was made by Special Projects," Geist said. That wasn't technically true, of course. The body was made to order by the VEEC special projects division, but the mind that had gone into it was not. Tina had been around for a long time. "Yeah, and he's going to be good and honked off when he does," Wuyap pointed out. "He's got a lot of that force mojo." Geist shrugged. "I wouldn't worry about it. He might just decide to try to turn her into his evil disciple." Geist chuckled. THAT would certainly turn out interesting. "Besides, Tina's been alone for three hundred years, she needs a dad." Wuyap shrugged as though such matters were beneath him (which they were). "Well, I'd better get back on the road." Geist nodded. "I'll see you when I see you," he said. His communicator started beeping. "What is it?" he said into the device. "This is Argon," the voice on the other end said. "I've got someone here who wants to see you." ***** Geist studdied the red haired girl carefully. "Interesting..." he said as he poked one of the girl's brests with his finger. "Hey!" the girl said, "Knock it off!" Geist turned to Argon. "Nobody else knows about this?" he asked. Argon shook his head. "I ran into her just inside the base fence. Didn't recognize her, and I was going to turn her into the guard when she told me her story, so I brought her here." "Well if its a fake, its a remarkably well made fake," Geist said, then turned back to the girl. "Are you sure you didn't just get drunk and pass out in a deranged plastic surgeon's office?" "I told you already!" the girl said angrilly, "I fell in a spring, and when I got out I looked like this. The guide said the spring was cursed, and warm water would turn me back to normal, but cold water would change me back into a girl." She slammed a fist into the table. "Everything would have been fine if it hadn't started raining before I could get inside!" "Relax, Stormie," Argon said. "It could be worse." Stormtrooper 1026 just glared at Argon. "Argon's right," Geist said. "You could have been turned into a wamprat." "So can you help me or not?" Stormie asked. "This kind of wierdness seems right up special project's alley." "Hmm..." Geist sat and thought. "I don't know. If it were quantum mechanics related, or some kind of genetic disease, I might be able to. Even if it were related to the force I might be able to do something, but a curse? That's a little out of my league. If I had some time, I'm sure I could cure you, but I'm retiring in a couple of days, technically I don't even work here anymore." "GEIST! DON'T YOU DARE LEAVE ME LIKE THIS!" Stormie yelled. "IF YOU CAN DO SOMETHING YOU DO IT OR I SWEAR I WILL KILL YOU AND EAT YOUR HEART WITH MY MORNING COFFEE!" Geist blinked once at the outburst, then shrugged. "Um... okay. It's going to take a while though," he said. "You are going to be stuck like that until I figure this out. No way around it, so you better get used to it." "I have no intention of getting used to this," Stormie replied. "Aw, come on," Argon said with an evil grin. "You're kinda sexy like that." "SHUT UP!" ***** And somewhere else, a Vorlon nodded. "And so it begins..." TO BE CONTINUED! Next Episode: Invasion!
 
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"Catching fishies, catching fishies,"
"on a hook, on a hook,"
"Pull em out the water, fry them up in batter,"
"Yum yum good, yum yum good."

Since it looks like Giest hasn't poisted this yet I'll do it for him. Invasion. Tycho e-mail me the refferences and then I'll credit your blackmarket account with eight cookies. VARNECK INHERITOR NERGAL Dubbed in English “You get to burning, It’s only arson, just control yourself, Those burns will heal…” Episode One: Invasion! Prologue: To go like a man! The entire shelter shook as far above the mysterious attackers continued their bombardment. In the meantime, Daishi frowned at the new tattoo that he had found on his hand. This was the last time he got drunk with the R&D guys. He didn’t care if the tattoo was part of some kind of direct neural interface system that would let him pilot some of the cool new weapons platforms they were cooking up, they had no business injecting him with nanomachines while he was passed out.  Daishi caught sight of a small boy greedily eyeing the crate of citrus fruit he had managed to bring down into the shelter with him when the raid sirens had started going off. The kid looked hungry. “You want one?” Daishi asked, offering the kid a piece of fruit. “Wow, cool,” the kid said as he snatched the fruit. The kid’s mother turned and smiled. “How kind of you,” she said. Daishi shrugged. “Naw, I’ve got a whole crate of them here.” “You’re a nice man,” the kid said. “You married?” “Wha…?” Daishi said, surprised. “My dad ran off with his secretary, and my mom is lonely,” the kid said. “She needs a man. You want the job? Dad used to say that mom was dynamite in the sack.” “Jay!” the mother said, smacking her son in the head. “I told you to stop trying to fix me up!” Daishi didn’t have much of a chance to say anything, as an explosion wracked the shelter, and a hole opened in the roof, through which a massive armored form dropped. The vaguely humanoid figure raked the shelter with slugthrower fire, strewing bodies about. The storm troopers assigned to defend the shelter opened fire in response, but their blasters seemed to have little effect on the attacker. “Keep firing!” the commander of the troopers yelled to his men. “We’ve got to get these civilians out of here!” Daishi could tell that the stormies weren’t doing much more than making the attacker mad. With an almost annoyed sigh, he ran to a nearby forklift. It seemed like he always had to do everything himself, even when he was on leave. The forklift was simple enough to operate. He switched it on and began revving the engine. “I’ll hold that thing off!” he said. “You people get out of here!” He thought he heard some shouts of protest, but he was already speeding towards the armored figure. The forklift slammed into the creature, pinning it to the wall, but Daishi didn’t stop, he kept his foot pressed down on the accelerator, slowly crushing the armored figure. “Kick his ass Mister!” he heard Jay yell. “We’ve got the doors open!” someone else said.  Any shouts of success were short lived, however, when another explosion ripped through the shelter. The force of the blast nearly threw Daishi from the forklift, and his foot slipped from the accelerator. As the sound of the forklift’s engine died, he looked around him. “Ah hell,” he said as he saw row upon row of armored figures marching into the shelter. There was no way out. ***** “One year has now passed since the disastrous defeat at the battle of Varneck” Tycho said. Around the table in this conference room on Erebria were a number of senior officials of the Vast Empire Engineering Corporation. “If the Vast Empire Navy continues to be unable to stop these invaders, Erebria will soon fall as well.” “Which is quite unacceptable,” a senior VP made sure to point out. Up till now, these invaders had proven to be virtually unstoppable. They had conquered Varneck in a short, brutal fight, wiping out a Vast Empire battle group in the process. “I have a question,” the whipid in the business suit at the other end of the table said. “What is that, Mr. Viper?” the senior VP asked. “What does this have to do with me?” “Project Copyright Violation,” the VP replied. “Are you aware of it?” “Of course,” Argon Viper replied. Project Copyright Violation was something of a pet evil project that had been floating around the VEEC for some time. It used to be called Scaparelli, but there had been an unfortunate encounter with a band of lawyers that had necessitated a change. “We want to implement it,” the VP said. “And given your extensive military experience, we believe you to be the best choice to carry it out.” “I don’t know,” Argon said. “It’s been a long time since I’ve worn a uniform.” “When do we ever wear uniforms?” Tycho asked. “Besides, this is going to involve at least a few lovely young women.” Argon raised an eyebrow. “Oh?” “And then there’s your bonus,” Tycho added, typing up some figures on an electronic notepad and passing it to Argon. “How’s this?” Argon studied the notepad for a second before turning back to Tycho. “One more question,” he said. “Is that… after taxes?” ***** “Now all we need are our human resources.” Tycho said as he and Argon left the office building. “You mean our crew?” Argon asked. “Since when did you start talking like an accountant?” Tycho shrugged. “So I’ve been working as an accountant part time. It pays the bills. But yeah, our crew. I’m sure we can get a hold of most of the old gang, but there are some that just aren’t around anymore.” That was the truth. Geist had retired a while back and pretty much vanished. Daishi had been on leave on Varneck when the whole mess started and hadn’t been heard from since. Others had just left here and there. The pair halted at a ninja crossing to allow for a herd of ninja to cross the road in a chorus of hyahs. As everyone did when encountering herds of the black cloaked urban game animals, they immediately decided not to worry about where the creatures were coming from, where they were going, or for god’s sake why they would be traveling in herds. Some things are better left unknown. “So anyhow,” Tycho said, breaking the awkward silence that always follows herds of ninja, “I’ve managed to find a lot of good people to fill out the crew, of course a few of them have some slight personality disorders…” Argon nodded. Somehow that didn’t surprise him at all. ***** They began collecting their new crew immediately.  An engineer, Mr. Aniston, was the first one they picked up. He seemed more than willing to sign on for this job, not even bothering to read his contract. Between the damage caused by the security droid he had apparently been building and his desire to escape from his wife, he was more than anxious to get away for a while. Stormtrooper 1026 came next, signing on as helmsman. His current job was fast becoming little more than that of a glorified secretary anyway, and he was up for something more interesting, even if only temporary. It probably also helped that Argon was able to blackmail him with a certain secret. A young blonde girl named Excel signed on after Stormie as ship’s janitor. Though her blatant personality defects nearly prevented her from getting the job, a glowing recommendation from the ghost of Yoda sealed the deal. Her companion was refused a job on the grounds that she kept dying. Somewhere along the way a writer wearing a black hat was also picked up. His primary assignment was apparently to write strange stories that meshed far too many science fiction stories together at once. A voice actress named Aku Koibito (who, if you want the hot gossip, is actually the evil clone of Jociam Geist’s wife Mellisaa) was chosen for the position of communications officer. Despite the stigma of being a dedicated servant of all that is evil in the universe, she soon proved to be a welcomed addition to the crew, in addition to helping fill affirmative action quotas for cute girls serving in important positions on capital warships. After much legal wrangling over copyright infringement, and the buying off of at least one federal judge, a twelve-year-old girl named Ruri Hoshino was named the ship’s computer specialist after being kidnapped from a rival company in a rival story. “One thing still bothers me,” Argon said soon after delivering Ruri to the naval base. “What’s that?” Tycho asked. “If I’m supposed to be tactical officer for this mission,” Argon said, “then who is going to be the captain?” “Don’t worry, I’ve got someone in mind.” ***** “TINA!” Admiral Riel Fury’s voice could be heard to echo through the house. “Tina,” Lieutenant Narm Greyrunner said to the closed door, “your father is starting to get upset.” “Well I’m sorry,” a woman’s voice came back through the door, “but this uniform is just so… it’s just not me.” “It’s a bit late to complain now,” Narm said.  “I know,” Tina replied. “But speaking of late, are you sure cutting the VE fleet to come with me is such a good idea?” “Well… I was worried,” Narm said. Even as he said it he realized how that sort of sounded. “That… That you might need help,” he quickly added. “Ah Narm,” Tina said, “you’re the best friend a girl could ask for.” “Yeah, sure.” Narm said. Riel Fury came stomping down the hall, stopping in front of Tina’s door. “Damnit Tina!” he yelled as he started pounding on the door. “You were supposed to leave an hour ago!” He reached for the doorknob. Narm leapt forward to stop the admiral from opening the door. “She’s still getting dressed right now!” he said. But the admiral would not be swayed. The two briefly struggled over the doorknob, in the process managing to knock the door open. Both men sprawled forward into Tina’s room. “AHHHHHHHH!” Tina screamed as she did her best to cover her mostly naked form. “Urp!” Narm uttered as he turned beet red. “My little girl is a woman!” Riel Fury exclaimed. With expert aim, Tina downed both men with a piece of her luggage. A bit later, Riel Fury watched his daughter leave. “Not only is she an officer, but she’s well endowed as well!” Riel Fury said as he watched the badly over laden landspeeder speed away. “Tina, your father is very proud.” ***** “The evil lizards from beyond the rim are attacking Erebria,” the monitor in the restaurant blared. “Its time to knock them out with our united fist!” A woman in the picture declared. She joined hands with a ring of children, all of them wearing little imperial navy uniforms. “THE VAST EMPIRE WILL PROTECT EREBRIA!” they declared. “This message has been brought to you by the Vast Empire,” the announcer said. The image changed to that of an ominous man wearing a black robe. “Remember, you belong to us,” he said. The picture suddenly cut out as a distant explosion rocked the building. “Not another air raid,” one patron said. “Hey!” another yelled into the kitchen. “What’s holding up my stir fry?” In the kitchen, Daishi clutched the handle of the frying pan tighter as he heard the explosions of bombs detonating, the screaming fall of TIE fighters being swatted aside by invader fighters. The images continued to flash through his mind. The boy named Jay, his mother, all the other civilians that had been killed in that shelter, the legions of armored figures. “ARRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH!” He yelled in rage, smashing the frying pan into the counter and splitting it in half, spilling the contents all over. Daishi stopped for a moment, looking at the stir-fry he had spilled. “Ah damn, I burned it!” he said. He felt a hand on his shoulder. Turning, he found himself confronted by the manager of the restaurant. “We need to talk,” the boss said. ***** “Damnit!” Daishi yelled as he rode his swoop bike down the nighttime streets of Erebria. His boss at the restaurant had been very forthright and honest, saying that Daishi’s behavior during the air raid just wasn’t the sort of image that he wanted his restaurant to show, and perhaps it was time for Daishi to move on. “What’s wrong with running away! And whose business is it anyway!” Daishi demanded of the night sky, his former employer had used the term yellow soldier to describe him, and in exchange Daishi had taken all the money in the register, three bottles of some very good brandy, and his former employer’s teeth with him as a severance package. “Why do I have to do all the fighting? Why can’t those damned VE brats handle the battles on their own!” Daishi had been very happy for the past year now, just working as a cook, fulfilling his family tradition of being a mighty chef, and then this happened. “What the hell am I supposed to do now?” A landspeeder, hideously overloaded with luggage, shot past at well over the local speed limit and pulled in front of him. “Jerk!” Daishi yelled. “You think you own the damn road!” On the landspeeder, one of the bungee cords gave way, and a suitcase flew free. There was no time to avoid it. The suitcase slammed directly into Daishi’s upper body, flipping both man and swoop bike over. The latches on the suitcase came free next, scattering possessions all over the road. “Why me god?” Daishi asked as he lay there, buried under a pile of women’s unmentionables. “Why always me?” “Oh my gosh, I’m sorry,” he heard a woman’s voice say. Sitting up, he saw a not too bad looking girl standing before him with a look of concern on her face. Up ahead, the landspeeder had stopped and the passenger side door was open. “I’m so terribly terribly sorry, how can you ever forgive me?” the woman continued. She seemed genuinely concerned in a mildly spastic sort of way. “Are you hurt? Is anything broken?” Daishi shook his head as he got to his feet. Aside from a rather painful lump now developing on the back of his head, he seemed to be perfectly fine. Rather remarkable, really, considered all the nasty physics involved in that collision. “I’m fine,” he said. “But you better get that luggage better secured, or you’re going to kill someone.” “I don’t understand,” the girl replied. “We packed it the best we could.” Daishi shook his head. “No you didn’t,” he said. “Let me show you.” The job took twenty minutes and as many meters of space tape, but soon enough, they had completed the job. “Thank you so much for all your help,” the girl said as they loaded the last bag back onto the landspeeder.  “Yeah, whatever,” Daishi said. “Just be more careful next time.” The girl nodded. “Yeah, I will.” She suddenly looked at Daishi intently. “You know, this is going to sound really strange,” she said. “Yeah?” Daishi asked. “Have you and I met before?” she asked. “Huh?” “Don’t you feel like there’s some connection here?” the girl added. “No, I really don’t feel like that at all actually,” Daishi replied. “Oh, how very strange,” the girl smiled. “Well, thanks for all your help. Bye.” Daishi watched the landspeeder pull away for a moment before turning back towards his swoop bike. It was time he got going wherever he was going. Not that he had an idea where that was or anything. Somewhere, maybe another restaurant would be willing to hire him. He noticed an object lying in the road, and stopped to pick it up. Probably another of that girl’s possessions that they had missed. “Wha…?” he uttered when he looked at it. It was a picture of him. “Wha? How? Why would she have a picture of me?” It hit him suddenly. “Of course, Tina!” Daishi ran back to his swoop bike, and sent it barreling down the road after the landspeeder. **** “Say what?” the ferret like creature protested. “What do you mean you don’t need us? We’re Kevin’s personal aids!” He waved his stubby arm in the direction of the rest of the ship’s bridge, as though to indicate the crewmembers that were gathered about at their various stations. “Do you really expect this band of primadonas do nothings and children will be able to do the job of trained officers?” Argon Viper, still in a business suit, briefly turned to glance at the crewmen the ferret (named Ferrox by the way) was pointing out. Stormtrooper 1026 was talking with Aku Koibito and Ruri. He turned back to Ferrox. “There’s nothing wrong with our crew,” he said. Technically Ferrox was a naval captain, and tradition and regs dictated he should be addressed as sir, but Argon just couldn’t bring himself to do it. “Of course they may be a little unusual, but they’re all experts in their fields, and our captain has never been defeated in the simulations.”  Ferrox scoffed. “Oh yeah?” he said. “Well just where is this miracle worker?” “Well, actually…” The door to the bridge slid open.  “This must be it!” Tina exclaimed with inhuman cheerfulness as she strode into the room. “Hi everyone! Have no fear, your new captain’s here!” For a moment, all anyone could do was stare blankly. Argon shook his head. Tina. Of all the possible candidates of all the planets of all the galaxies, why did Tycho have to choose Tina? ***** “Well you see sir,” the security guard was saying, “this guy just rode up to the front gate on a swoop bike and started raising a ruckus.” Tycho stepped further into the cell to get a better look at the prisoner, then froze. “Remove his restraints,” he said to the guard. “Sir?” the guard asked, confused. “Now!” The guard quickly complied, though he was still obviously confused about the order. “Leave us,” Tycho said. The guard saluted, then walked out of the cell. “I almost didn’t recognize you,” Tycho said, “without your armor.” Daishi rubbed his wrists as he got to his feet. “It’s been a long time,” he said. “A year,” Tycho said. “Everyone had assumed that you had been killed when the invaders attacked Varneck. How did you get to Erebria?” Daishi shook his head. “I can’t remember,” he replied. “All I know is that I was on Varneck, and the next thing I knew I was here on Erebria.” “That’s it?” Tycho asked. “That’s it. I’m as in the dark as you are.” “Hmm,” Tycho said. “So why are you here? I see you’ve got the new neural interface implants. Did you come to sign on as one of our pilots?” “No,” Daishi said. “I’m not a pilot, and I’m sick of being a soldier. Right now I’m just a cook. I came to see Tina.” “Why do you want to see her?” “Her connections,” Daishi replied. “I want to know who it was that attacked Varneck and what they’re doing there. Since her dad is so high up the VE totem pole, I’d hope he would have some answers. That planet is my home, and I need to know what’s happened to it.” “I see, but I don’t think there’s all that much her father could tell you.” Tycho scratched his chin for a second. “A cook, huh?” he said. “We need cooks. I guess this means you’re in luck. From now on, you’ll be a cook on the Nergal.” “The Nergal?” Daishi said with surprise. “You mean it’s finished?” “Yeah,” Tycho said. “We’re going to launch in a couple hours, so why don’t you take a walk around to get to know her.” Daishi shrugged. “Why not?” then followed Tycho out of the cell. ***** “Let’s go Battlemech!” a voice echoed through the hangar bay. On the main bay floor a giant robot seemed to be shadowboxing. “That’s a hatav, not a Battlemech!” the chief engineer protested from the hangar bay floor. The pilot of the giant robot didn’t seem to care. “Get back you evil invaders or I shall crush you with my wrath!” he said with pure glee. “I’ll finish you off with my particle cannon!” Leaning against the rail of the catwalk above the hangar bay floor, Daishi watched the exchange. So this was a hatav. Daishi had heard about the new humanoid weapons platforms but had never seen one. He knew it was controlled by a direct neural interface system through nanomachine implants in the pilot, allowing the pilot to control it as though it were his body. This was supposed to make piloting a hatav so simple literally anyone could do it. “Hey!” the chief engineer was saying to the giant robot, “Who are you and how did you get up there? Our pilots aren’t supposed to be arriving for three days!” The giant robot stopped and began to shake slightly as the pilot laughed, in essence chuckling right along with him. “Are you kidding?” the pilot said. “When I heard that we were going to be piloting real robots, I couldn’t get here fast enough! This is the real thing baby, WOO!” The hatav struck a semi-dramatic pose. “Will you stop that!” the engineer demanded. “Playtime’s over!” “Hey, you’re talking to the greatest robo pilot who’s ever lived!” the pilot replied. “And to prove it I’ll show you one of my super amazing JERRY KILLER MOVES!” The robot drew back for a punch. “JERRY SUPER CHIN STRIKE!” the pilot cried out as he swung at an imaginary opponent. Even before he completed the swing, it was obvious that he had thrown his balance horribly off. The robot’s arms flailed about briefly, but there was nothing that could be done as the machine crashed to the hangar floor. The hatch of the machine popped over, and the pilot climbed out, laughing. At first he seemed fine, but fairly suddenly he collapsed to the floor. Daishi couldn’t quite hear everything that was being said as the engineer was checking the pilot, but he heard something about a broken leg. Daishi didn’t know how anyone could break their leg piloting a war machine, but apparently that was what happened. “Hey!” the pilot yelled as they were hauling him out on a stretcher. “You up on the catwalk!” “Me?” Daishi asked. “Is there anyone else up there?” the pilot asked rhetorically. “My most precious possession is still in that cockpit, could you get it for me, pretty please?” It took Daishi a while to get down to the main floor, and by that time the stretcher had already been taken away. Daishi climbed into the cockpit of the hatav. “A museum scale Atlas is this guy’s most precious possession?” Daishi asked himself as he spotted the pewter miniature laying in the pilot seat. “Just how old is this guy mentally?” An alarm began to blare, and Daishi suddenly heard Argon Viper’s voice come over the intercom. “Our forces are now engaged with the enemy’s tactical fighters,” he said. “All bridge crews, report to the command center immediately!” Daishi looked up at the ceiling. Far above he heard a faint explosion. “They’re here!” ***** “The enemy seems to be concentrating their attacks directly above our position,” Argon said. The main holotable was displaying the forces buzzing around the massive facility where the Nergal was housed. All the senior officers were present for this meeting. “And we can assume that the Nergal is their target,” Kevin said. Kevin was their liaison with the VE fleet, a decorated admiral (okay, not WITH the VE per se, but lets not worry about that), and though actually just a figurehead to give the operation some legitimacy, technically in charge. “If that’s the case,” Ferrox said. Some quirk of fate (and possibly ninjas) had made the ferret like creature Kevin’s adjutant. “We’ll hit them where it hurts!” “What do you mean?” Argon asked. “If we sweep the perimeter with the Nergal’s cannons, we’ll burn them to a crisp.” “Are you proposing to vaporize our own fighters?” Stormtrooper 1026 asked.  “Well why not?” Ferrox asked. “They’re going to die anyway.” “Would you call that cold blooded,” Aku asked Stormie, “or just cowardly?” “Captain,” Kevin said, speaking to Tina. “Do you have any suggestions?” The cute and bubbly young woman that had pranced onto the bridge not that long ago seemed to vanish instantly, replaced by a woman of deadly seriousness. “The Nergal will go through the underwater passage, and into the open ocean,” she said, “flank the enemy from behind, and obliterate them. We’ll need a decoy.” “That’s where Jerrard Cranston comes in!” the ship’s only current pilot said once everyone got over the shock caused by the captain acting seriously. “I can engage the enemy with my giant robot, and lure them away from the base. It’ll be great!” He raised one crutch high in excitement. “It’s my destiny, YEAH!” “With a triple compound fracture?” Aniston, the chief engineer, asked. Suddenly realizing he was feeling pain, Jerry stumbled to the ground. “I forgot that,” he admitted. “Not to contribute to this grotesque feeling of déjà vu any more than I have to,” Ruri, the computer officer, interrupted, “but we already have a decoy.” Everyone looked at the twelve year old in surprise. “There’s a hatav in the main elevator shaft,” she elaborated. In that hatav, Daishi continued to gripe to himself. “There’s no way I’m going to die aboard this ship!” he said. Piloting this thing really was as simple as it was supposed to be. Just resting his hand on the control port allowed him to control it as though it were part of him. “I’m just a freaking cook now! I’m not going to get killed in some stupid war!” Without warning a holographic image of one of his former commanders, Kevin, appeared before him. For a second he thought it was some sort of evil spirit coming after him (or perhaps another ghost like Tina used to be) but then he remembered the special holographic communication system that had been installed aboard the Nergal and tied into each crewmember’s communicator. “Identify yourself,” Kevin started. “Wait… Daishi? I didn’t know you were on this ship. You’re one of our pilots?” “Um, no,” Daishi replied. A second holographic face appeared. This one was that pilot that had been in the hangar bay. “That’s my battlemech!” he protested. “So what are you doing…” Kevin started to ask. “I signed on as a cook,” Daishi replied. “A WHAT?!” the pilot yelled. “WHAT’S A COOK DOING INSIDE MY ROBOT!?” Back on the bridge, Tina began to wonder. This was the man that helped her on the road. “Daishi…” she said, running the name over in her head. Suddenly, it hit her. “Robert, ITS ROBERT!” In the cockpit, a holographic representation of Tina’s face appeared as the others were cut off. “I knew it,” she said eagerly. “I knew we knew each other somewhere Robert, I was right, wasn’t I? Did you just pretend not to know me because you’re so shy Robert? “Now wait just one second here!” Daishi demanded. “Just what are you doing on this ship anyway?” Tycho’s face popped up. “Why she’s the captain of the Nergal.” “WHAT?” “That’s right, Robert,” Tina said. “I’m the captain of the Nergal, pretty cool, huh?” “Does Geist know you gave his favorite toy to Tina?” Daishi asked Tycho. “Relax,” Tycho said. “It’ll all work out fine.” He then cut off his transmission. His floating disembodied head vanished. “Oh,” Tina said. “But I can’t let you act as a decoy against the enemy.” “What? Act as a what?” “But I know how devoted you are towards conducting your mission,” Tina continued, “and mere words from a sentimental woman wouldn’t sway you, will they?” “Yeah they will!” Daishi said frantically. “All right,” Tina said, “I’m entrusting the fate of the Nergal and all her crew to you Robert. Just promise me that… you’ll come back alive.” Her transmission likewise cut off. “Alive? Hey, what?” Daishi said, but there was no further response from Tina. A young girl, about twelve, was the next to appear. “The elevator is about to reach ground level,” she said. “Good luck and may the force be with you,” another girl, who looked disturbingly like Geist’s wife, said next. “GIVE ME BACK MY BATTLEMECH!” the pilot yelled one last time. “JUST SHUT UP!” Daishi yelled back as the elevator arrived at the top. All three holoimages cut off, replaced by Argon. “You have ten minutes,” he said. “Just keep the enemy occupied. Good luck.” Daishi looked around him in shock. There were literally hundreds of armored figures identical to the ones he had faced on Varneck surrounding him. How was he supposed to fight all of these? Tina’s words flashed back through his mind. “I’m entrusting the fate of the Nergal and all her crew to you Robert,” she had said. Daishi triggered the reaction jets built into the back of the hatav, hurling it into the air. “OH THIS STINKS!” he began to yell, “IT’S NOT FAIR! THIS WAS NOT PART OF MY PLAN!” The hatav landed on its feet a good one hundred and fifty meters away from where it jumped. “I DID NOT SIGN UP FOR THIS CRAP!” Daishi yelled as he sent the war machine running. He kept up a good pace for some time, and his radar screen told him he had most of the enemy following him, but he doubted he could keep this pace forever. “Seven minutes?” he said, looking at the timer on his control panel, “How am I supposed to keep running for another seven minutes? I’ve had it with this, damnit! Enough is enough! ARRRRRGHHH!” He brought the hatav to a sliding halt and turned it to face his pursuers. “I’M SICK AND TIRED OF RUNNING FROM YOU MONSTERS!” he screamed as he opened fire with the formidable arsenal his war machine wielded. Clusters of small concussion missiles flew out into the attacking swarm, striking down scores of enemy units. Daishi followed that up with short, controlled bursts from the massive laser cannon-rifle the machine carried, downing more with each volley, but it still wasn’t enough. The enemy kept coming. A lucky barrage from an enemy unit slammed into the hatav’s upper torso, in the process wrecking the rifle. “Okay you freaks!” Daishi yelled as he discarded the rifle. “You want a piece of me? Come and get it!” The enemy swarmed him from all sides, and Daishi plunged his machine into close combat. The battle became a blur, and Daishi responded by reflex. Strike, dodge, parry. A reaction jet assisted jump to evade one blaster barrage, using an enemy unit as a shield against a missile barrage. Without any real idea of how he got there, Daishi soon found his hatav standing in a sea of shattered enemy machines, wielding the leg of an AT-ST (no doubt downed before he arrived) as a club. “WHO WANTS SOME!?!” Daishi yelled at the remaining enemy units, who were forming up elsewhere, as though to respond to another threat out to sea. The sea in the meantime rumbled with a sudden turbulence. Riding powerful repulsorlifts, a warship slowly rose from the depths. The sleek and awesome vessel turned its bow and the improbably huge gun barrel protruding from it towards the invaders. There was a single puff of smoke from the main gun, and it was over. One by one the armored attackers exploded, leaving little more than small fragments behind. “Whoa!” Daishi said. He’d heard estimations of the Munchion Cannon’s capabilities, but he had never imagined this. Tina’s face appeared before him. “I’m sorry we kept you waiting, Robert,” she said. “What do you mean?” Daishi asked. “It hasn’t been ten minutes yet, has it?” “I rushed the schedule for your sake,” she replied. “You were really amazing out there.” “Now hold on a second,” Daishi said. “I didn’t come here to fight, and I didn’t come here to save you or anything. I just came here to see you…” “ME! You came to see me!” Tina exclaimed. “That’s not what I said.” Daishi held up the picture he had found on the road. “I just saw this and I came to find…” “Oh, the picture!” Tina said. “You came all this way to bring it back to me? Oh you’re just too good for little old me!” “Will you stop that!” Daishi demanded. “I have a question to ask you and its important, so shut up!” “A question?” Tina asked with a puzzled look. Her look changed back to excited soon enough, however. “You mean THAT question? Oh, you’re rushing things now Robert!” “NO I’M NOT!” “Yes, of course,” Tina replied. “I know you didn’t mean it like that. First we’ll have to spend a lot of time together and…” “I WANT MY BATTLEMECH BACK FRYBOY!” The pilot interrupted. “WILL SOMEONE LISTEN TO ME!” Daishi demanded. “Oh, Robert,” Tina said, “I know exactly how you’re feeling right now…” “YOU DON’T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME! YOU’RE DRIVING ME CRAZY!” “Oh my dearest,” Tina said. “You drive me a little crazy too. It will be tough at first, but we can make things work…” On the Nergal’s bridge, Argon turned towards Tycho. “You knew this would happen, didn’t you? Hiring crew is your responsibility.” Tycho seemed to be doing his best to restrain a chuckle. “It makes the whole thing a bit more interesting, doesn’t it?” “I would have said warped.” ***** Epilogue: It only gets worse from here… “I close my eyes and I keep seeing things, rainbow waterfalls…” The song kept playing as the writer typed. He always preferred to write with background music. Of course right now he was at something of an impasse, he didn’t know where to take the story from here. There was a knock at his cabin door. “Come in,” he said. The man who entered his cabin stopped to look around the room with a disgusted look, and for the ten thousandth time, the writer decided that he needed to clean the place up at some point. Every surface was covered with empty pop cans, computer parts, cloths (dirty and otherwise) and books on subjects ranging from Immortal Warrior to quantum mechanics. “Can I help you?” the writer asked his visitor. The visitor nodded. He wore a well-tailored Italian suit (which should tell you something is wrong, I mean, just how did he get that anyway?) and carried a briefcase. “I’m here on behalf of Harmony Gold, to talk to you about this little story of yours.” “Harmony Gold?” the writer asked. “You mean Xebec, or maybe AD Vision?” “No, I mean Harmony Gold. We have the exclusive rights to the story that you are so blatantly copying and we are going to sue you for it.” “No you don’t,” the writer replied. “Harmony Gold has nothing to do with this. You’re just being a brat.” The lawyer looked like he was about to cry. “Shut up!” he said as he tried to hold back the sobs, “How dare you suggest that we don’t have ultimate power over all things related to giant robot anime! We are going to sue your ass off!” “Whatever, pal,” the writer said. “Just get out of my cabin.” “You’re mocking me!” the Lawyer exclaimed. “How dare you ignore us! YOU WILL BE CONSUMED BY OUR UNHOLY FIRE!” The writer blinked. “Okay, this is getting a little weird…” The door to the cabin opened again, and a slightly hyperactive girl came in, trying to hide a sword behind her back. I was going to do a watch your eye line gag here, but it just doesn’t work in this format, so lets just skip ahead. “Oh, a witness!” the girl said, “Excel cannot allow any witnesses to escape, it would be an incredible danger to the security of ACROSS!” she raised the sword. At this point I don’t think it would be proper to describe all the gory details of this encounter, so instead let us meditate on more beautiful things. “Come on! Die like a man!” Picture the beauty of a butterfly, how it looks like a little angel fluttering through the air. “Wow, you’re resilient! You can sure take a slashing!” Imagine the beauty of the meadow. A small white rabbit hops serenely across. “No please no! I’m too self important to die!” The majestic beauty of the Falcon as it glides through the blue sky. “That’s right, I’ll feed you your liver in the name of Ilpalatzo!” All those wonderful things that God, in his wisdom, put on this Earth. “Come off! Who knew that cartilage could be so tough?” Yes, all those wonderful things in that great tapestry of nature, but anyhow, lets get back to this story. The girl slipped out of the cabin, and marched down the corridor, content that her job on the Nergal was done. ***** TO BE CONTINUED! (whether you like it or not!) Next Episode: It’s just like that show…
 
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RA(U) Daishi COSOS
"If we had all knowladge then why would we seek what we already know and if we had no knowladge then how could we even ask the question?"  Plato
"Indeceant exposure is fun." Sonatina
"There are at least three sides to any situation." Me

Hmmm...I'm important...I like this :P. Very good story, Daishi. Nice touches of humor here and there enhanced it greatly. Please keep it up. If I can add to this in any way, please just tell me how.
 
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Corporal Tycho Celchu, Slicer
Dread Knights, Vast Empire's Stormtrooper Corps
Union Representative of the Dread Knights
[email protected]
AIM: Tycho987
ICQ: 110585444

The last episode was Geist'sd work.  This one is all mine.  No one has e-mailed me with the list of refferences yet either. Episode 2: "It's just like that show..." Daishi was going through the ussual routine of how he shouldn't have done what he did but now that he'd have to stay on as a reserve pilot. "At least that way you'll get paid more."  Argon said as Daishi started looking around the hanger nervously. That's all you're going to do after he stole what should haver been my staring moment?"  Jerry shouted from his place in the hanger. "Look at what you did to my precious hatav."  Mr. Aniston shouted from across the hanger. ***At VEN headquarters on Lotaith*** "I understand your daughter is the captain of that ship."  Anakin said. "You realize Admiral Fury that we cannot allow civillians to retain controll of such a powerfull warship.  Of course if they made a request to join the VEN..."  Threeof4 said. "I understand.  Set course to intercept the Nergal."  Reil Fury replied as he began to think of what his brilliant and well endowed daughter must be doing at this moment. ***Outside Daishi's quarters*** Tina Fury was walking down the hallway in her ussual spastic self. "Robert.  Robert.  Robert."  Tina said outside Daishi's door each time more spastic then the last. "Allright, I'm coming just give me a second to..."  Daishi said as he exited the shower with nothing but a towel on and the door opened. "That's okay as captain of the Nergal I have a key to every room."  Tina said as both were sent into shock. ***A few moments later inside Daishi's cabin*** "Well at least I know you are a fully grown man so I'll forgive you this time."  Tina said as she poured herself a cup of green tea. "Forgive me?  You're the one that barged into my room Tina."  Daishi replied as he finished putting on his cook's uniform. "Oh that's wonderfull, you're still willing to call me Tina even though I'm your captain.  Don't you remember how you used to chase me around every where shouting 'Tina.  Tina.  Tina!'."  Tina said before Daishi could grumble and complain. "That's not how I remember it at all."  Daishi said as he reached off screen and pulled down a flash back of when the two first met. The scene was of Tina chasing Daishi across some field shouting 'Robert!  Robert!  Robert!' and then falling down and giving up the chase.  The flash back goes back off screen to reveal the two still inside Daishi's cabin. "Actually that's how I remember it."  Daishi continued. "You sure?  It really doesn't matter anyway.  I tried to contact you then when I heard about that horrible accident on your homeworld..."  Tina replied. "I don't believe you."  Daishi said dismissing Tina. "Wait, Robert.  Please stop."  Tina said chasing Daishi down the corridor. Daishi walked on to the galley ignoring Tina the whole way until she stopped at an alluminum can recycling bin. "Robert listen to me."  Tina said as she threw three cans at Daishi. "What did you do that for."  Daishi said angerly. "Because you were ignoring me."  Tina replied. "Allright I'll tell you what happened but first...  Empty cans..."  Robert said as he started putting cans back in the recycling bin. "Go in the recycling bin."  Tina finished the sentance and the crew in the immediate area all collapsed. Daishi stood in front of a display case of all available menu items right next to his favorite dish,  Gungan Chow Mein. Tina stood near the Fried Whawee Bowl, limited servings only. "My planet was attacked.  I think your father might now why.  If I find out you or your father had something to do with it I'll kill you both."  Daishi said with a rather serious tone. "You'd really kill me."  Tina said as the scene faded to black. Now on screne was a scene of Robert in a white suit on one knee holding Tina by one hand and resting her back against his only available knee.  Tina was wearing a red dress and netted stockings. "I'll kill you with love."  The imaginary Robert said. "Slay me.  Slay me."  The imaginary Tina replied. The scene faded back to the galley with Tina front and center. "This is just like one of those hard boiled detective holovids."  Tina said getting herself all worked up. "Robert Lee.  Fry cook.  I humbily submit my services."  Daishi could be heard reporting to the ship's cook, Deathwookie. "Captain could you please report to the bridge.  Mr. Celchu would like to make an announcement."  Melissa's evil clone said from her holographic projection. "I'll be right up."  Tina replied. ***On the bridge of the Nergal*** "The reason we have kept the Nergal's destination a secret up until this point is to distract those who would undermine our mission.  As part of Project Copyright infringement we will not be working with the VEN or VEA at all."  Tycho rambled over the comm. "Our destination is Varneck."  Admiral Setzer replied. "What, wouldn't this vessel be better used to defend the Vast Empire?"  Narm said from his position on the bridge. "We need to find out what happened to Varneck, all those people and resources."  Tycho replied. ***Back in the gally*** "Wow this is great.  I'm going to get to go home."  Daishi said as a fry pan bounced off his head. "[Get back to work.]"  Deathwookie growled from the kitchen. ***Back on the bridge*** "We have several new contacts entering the area."  Ruri announced from her post. "Oh my it's the Nemisis, Devastator, and the Atrus, that means..."  Tina said as she was cut off by the sudden appreance of her father's communique. "Tina my dear, have you lost weight?"  Riel Fury asked with the look on his face that could make even a Fallen Angel quessy. "It's my father.  What do you want now daddy?"  Tina replied monotinously. "You see Tina my dear your daddy has his orders, I don't like them but I have to carry them out.  I need you to bring the master key and come on over."  Riel Fury responded. "I think I'm going to be sick."  Argon said from his post still wearing the buisseness suit. "Key?  We don't have a master key.  Why should I surrender to you anyway, we got the munchion cannon?"  Tina replied. "Because I now have control of this ship."  Ferox said as he and dozens of stormtroopers entered the bridge. All the non-VE crewers were taken to the galley, except for Narm, Tina and Tycho.  Narm Tina and Tycho were taken down to the hanger bay where they boarded a shuttle bound for the Atrus. ***Aboard the Atrus's conference room*** Tina waited abourd the Atrus's conference room for Tycho to come back from his talks with the VEEC. "Have you grown?"  Riel Fury inquired with warmth and compassion. "It's only been two days since you saw me last."  Tina replied. "Still Tina dear you must be famished from all the excitement.  We have german choclate cake, double chocolate cake, cheese cake, and angel food cake.  Please try some."  Riel Fury said bubbling over with delight at seeing his daughter again. "Do yiou remeber Robert Lee.  He says that it wasn't an accident that happened to his world."  Tina replied. "The name doesn't ring a bell.  I thought it had been made quite clear that it was an accident, there must be some mistake."  Riel Fury replied. "I see."  Tina whispered from her seat. ***On board the Nergal in the galley*** "Who could have imagined our dreams of freedom and glory lasted less then a day."  Mr. Aniston said as he leaned up against a vending machine. "I was hoping to meet some dashing pilots and have some great adventures aboard this battleship.  Mr. Celchu probably can't help us too much.  He doesn't seem all that reliable."  Melissa's evil clone chatted with Stormtrooper1026. "You of all people should know not to judge a person by thier outer appearance."  Stormie replied. "Come on what's the matter with you people.  I got something that will chase all those blue feelings away."  The insane pilot said on the border of shouting. "[Hey, Daishi.  That crazy pilot says he's going to show us something.]"  Deathwookie said as Daishi was peelling  some potatoes. "Because I have nothing better to do I'm willing to help even you.  I've never tried hook something this archiac to a modern vidscreen before."  Mr. Aniston  said as he finished hooking a laser disc player to the galley vidscreen. "Now behold.  Switching unit on.  Inserting disk."  The crazy pilot said. Suddenly the screen was filled with the original opening sequence to "The Immortal Warrior". "Hey this isn't the opening I remember."  Daishi said from his front row seat. "That's right this opening was replaced by the now classic opening begining in episode four hundred.  Oh it's you."  The crazy pilot said. "Partical cannon.!"  The immortal warrior shouted. "Do they shout everything because they have voice activated weapons?"  Argon said puzzled at the spectacle he was forced to endure. "Don't you see the peotry involved.  It's about blood guts and glory.  A secret base overthrown, a goverment conspiracy, and don't you see how the survivors are going to rise up and make a better future for all mankind."  Jerry shouted in response. "Right."  Daishi said as he got up from his chair and grabbed a frying pan. Opening the door and knocking each of the guards on thier head with the frying pan before any could react, Daishi had incited the revolution. "I'm willing to fight for the ones I care about.  All the VE wants is to protect themselves.  They don't care about what happened to all the people on my homeworld or the people on the other lost colonies.  I'm going to take a hatav and get the captain back."  Daishi said as he took off toward the hanger with one of the stormtrooper's rifles. ***Back aboard the Atrus's conference room*** "I've discussed it at great lengths with the board of directors.  We have decided that the Nergal is still private property and we will not condon this act of piracy."  Tycho said as he entered the conferrence room. "I see."  Riel Fury replied. Riel Fury lead Narm and his staff up to the bridge. "We have an emmergance wave comming from behind us.  The Crocus and the Panzy are being forced into hyperspace."  A sensor operator on the Atrus interupted the Admiral's train of thought. "Allright Tina, I need the authorization codes to the Nergal.  What where did she and Tycho get to?"  Riel Fury asked shocked that somehow the two had gotten away. "Tina weren't you going to surrender the ship?"  Narm asked in shock on the bridge of the Atrus. "I'm sorry daddy but I only came to find out what you knew about what happened to Robert's home.  A captain never surrenders thier ship to someone that they know has lied to them.  You taught me that one daddy."  Tina replied from the shuttle. ***Back aboard the Nergal's main hanger*** "You'll have to set for a manual launch.  Just follow Ruri's directions."  Argon said from the hanger floor blasting away with an assault rifle in each hand still wearing the buisseness suit. "So a manual launch means he just runs out of the hanger bay?"  Melissa's evil clone said to Ruri. "Yes."  Ruri replied cracking a bit of a smile. "Did I just see you smile?"  Melissa's evil clone asked playfully. "Perhaps we are all idots."  Ruri replied. ***In the command information and control room of the Nergal*** A holographic transmition of Argon Viper popped up in front of Ferox and his staff. "Just surrender."  Argon Viper said gleefully. Suddenly the door opened and Deathwookie stepped in with a frying pan and the happiest expression possible for a wookie who used blood for pretty much every cosmetic purpose. The last image of Ferox to be transmitted was Ferox's face showing extreme fear just before it was violantly introduced to a frying pan.  In the galley one of the cute, bubbley, and innocent looking Deathwookie girls changed the display on the Fried Whawee Bowl to say 'now serving, and fresh!' A holographic projection of the captain appeared throughout the ship. "V!"  Tina said gleefully. "Huh, I was supposed to come get you, oh well."  Daishi said mostly to himself. "Oh Robert are you going to be my decoy again.  I'll board the Nergal while you draw thier fire."  Tina said as Daishi floated past the shuttle. "That hatav isn't configured for space borne battle."  Mr. Aniston's shouting finally broke through the commotion. "What?"  Daishi said as he tried to get his hatav to manuever in space. "Just switch it to zero g mode you moron."  Jerry said over the comm. "Oh like this?"  Daishi said as he pressed a few buttons and the hatav reconfigured itself into more of a fighter then a humanoid robot. "Yeah there you go."  Jerry replied. "Partical cannon!"  Daishi shouted as he started firing at the enemy warship in front of him. With the guns overheating Daishi dove right in and began fighting with the enemy warship hand to turret. "Ruri full systems analasys please."  Tina said in serious mode. A bunch of hologrphic displays popped up around the bridge with systems redouts except for the onf in the center, which had a yellow smiley face on it. "Stand by on munchion cannon."  Tina said. "Aye captain."  Ruri replied. "Fire the munchion cannon."  Tina ordered. Suddenly a small puff of smoke dissipated from the barrel of the cannon and a group of ninjas migrated in front of the partical absorbing it but making one heck of a mess. "Close to point blank range so no more ninjas can absorb the shot."  Tina ordered angrily. "Aye Ma'm."  Stormtrooper1026 replied. "Fire again."  Tina ordered with more effect this time. "What a nutbar.  What was she thing closing to point blank range?"  Daishi said from his hatav cockpit. ***On board the bridge of the Atrus*** "Admiral should we persue?"  A bridge offer inquired. "Persue?  What would be the point?  Give me a full report on this Robert Lee she mentioned."  Riel Fury replied. 'Tina what are you doing?'  Narm thought to himself. ***At the evil anime production studios*** *At the beginning of the scene Cannon in D minor can be heard but as the scene progresses it changes to Ride of the Valkeries then finally to the Imperial march "I'm finished Joana, see you same time tommorrow."  Why said as he headed home. Sitting down to work somemore on the production sketches Why turned up the background music. His door suddenly opened Why turned around to face the intruder. "I'm here on behalf of Lucasfilms Limited.  We're going to sue your ass just because we want to."  The lawyer said. Suddenlt a dark shadow crept over Why and all that could be seen now were two glowing eyes and the word meth at a fourty five degree angle about where the mouth should be. The lawyer threw down a smoke bomb and several ninjas appeared. The onlything other then the tourmented screams of his victims, the breaking and teaing of fleash and bone, and the sound of blood running like a water fall that could be heard was the lawyer shouting "He fights like a Goliath Scorpion."
 
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RA(U) Daishi COSOS
"If we had all knowladge then why would we seek what we already know and if we had no knowladge then how could we even ask the question?"  Plato
"Indeceant exposure is fun." Sonatina
"There are at least three sides to any situation." Me

It's the best casting we could come up with for the roles everyone is portraying. I can't help it if Riel was perfect for the role me and Geist agreed upon. You get to blame me solely for Stormie's role though(you'll understand in the christmas episode which will be my duty to write,though if we follow the rotation Geist will be responsible for the Immortal Warrior/New Years episode). Anyway it's all for the sake of having some fun even if we are violating copyrights and trademarks up the wazoo.
 
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RA(U) Daishi COSOS
"If we had all knowladge then why would we seek what we already know and if we had no knowladge then how could we even ask the question?"  Plato
"Indeceant exposure is fun." Sonatina
"There are at least three sides to any situation." Me

Anything Narm did involved swearing... -- The artist formerly known as Fish Surreptitious lurker

Can I have 'all of the above'?
 
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Ramon Stonefish

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Nobody expected sixteen-year-old Tina Fury to do well as the captain of the Nergal. However the captain and her rather eclectic crew have already overcome a takeover attempt by the Vast Empire. Now the high mobile warship is on its way to Varneck... VARNECK INHERITOR NERGAL Dubbed in English Episode 3: Kinda Sorta a Serious Thing To protect Erebria from the invaders beyond the rim, a series of defensive lines has been placed around the planet. The first defensive line, also known as the big barrier, is composed of fusion powered interdiction field generators, supported by a massive defensive shield system. Unfortunately, this field works both ways, and the Nergal will have to cross this obstacle in order to jump to lightspeed. I wouldn't want to die in a place like this... ***** "We cannot overlook the existence of the warship Nergal any longer," the head of the New Imperial fleet said. "The time for wars between our individual factions is long gone, and the Epsilon sector is united in our struggle against these mysterious attackers from beyond the rim." Senior officers from half a dozen imperial factions nodded in agreement. This was a major meeting between every power in the Epsilon Sector. "The crew of the Nergal, however, seems to think Varneck is more important," The chief commander continued, "How can we allow this... disloyalty... to go unpunished!" A number of officers nodded in agreement. A minor aid rose to her feet. "Forgive this interruption, chief commander, but we are receiving an emergency message." "Now what?" the chief commander asked impatiently. "Well sir..." the aid said with hesitation, "its the Nergal." A woman appeared on the massive holoprojector in the center of the room, clad in a thin, fairly short, bare shouldered dress. "HYEE!" Tina said cheerfully, "Happy New Year everybody!" "God she's hot!" A senior officer exclaimed, many others uttering similar statements. The chief commander just shook his head. Tina turned, as though talking to someone away from the holoprojector. "Don't worry, Kevin, just let me charm them all." "Can we get on with this," the chief commander demanded irritably. "Yes, of course," Tina said. "The fact is that the Nergal will reach the big barrier in about three hours, but, unless you shut down your shield emitters to let us pass, we're going to have to destroy some of them." Her matter of fact tone didn't seem to win her any points with the chief commander. "So would you be nice and shut the emitters down, pretty please?" "You want us to disable the big barrier?" the chief commander asked incredulously. "Are you insane? Forget it!" Tina giggled to herself. "Okay, we'll just do this the hard way then." "That was the last straw!" the chief commander yelled. "If you cross the barrier, you will all be outlaws!" A look of mock surprise appeared on Tina's face. "Is that so?" The smile returned. "I guess we'll have to live with it." The transmission cut off, and the chief commander visibly composed himself after such a display of insolence. "This is no longer a time for debate, this is a time for action!" he said to the assembled officers. "To maintain order, we must destroy the Nergal!" An officer from the VE fleet stood up. "But if we destroy it, we will lose the most advanced weapon we have," he said. "Over seventy percent of the Nergal's crew are affiliated with the VE, and currently the VE is bearing the brunt of the fighting. I wonder about you're willingness to let our forces do all the bleeding, and now it looks as though you are looking to destroy our best weapon." The officer turned to the man sitting next to him. "Admiral Fury, do you have any thoughts as to how to bring this to a peaceful conclusion?" Riel Fury stood up. "While Tina is my daughter," he said, "I'm taken aback by her boldness." He chuckled. "And by the way she filled out that dress." Most of the VE personnel present seemed pretty embarrassed by their admiral's words, though a few seemed to agree. In any case, the opinions of the VE officers were in the minority, and it was decided that the Nergal had to die. ***** "Midlevel punch!" a cartoon warrior on the vidscreen yelled as his giant robot threw a punch against his opponent. A burst from the enemy's autocannon tore into the arm, blowing the machine's hand clean off. "But my mech has ferro fiberous armor!" the hero (if you want to think of him as such) protested, appalled at the damage his opponent's heavy guns were capable of dealing. "That was very amusing, Federat," the evil (for indeed he was) enemy said. "NOW IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO DIE!" Before the cartoon could continue any more, the picture briefly cut out as an explosion shook the Nergal. "Not again!" Jerrard Cranston (or Galen Cox if you prefer the boring name his mother happened to give him) complained. "Yeah, and just when it was getting interesting too," Daishi said. "Why doesn't Tina do something about those clowns?" he asked. Warheads launched from orbiting defense platforms had been striking the ship almost constantly ever since they had made it out of Erebria's atmosphere. Jerrard (Galen) was busy straightening an Immortal Warrior poster that had been knocked askance by the impact. The two had ended up assigned the same quarters because of their mutual status as pilots. "There's not much she can do," he said. "Our retarded wave compression field was designed as a countermeasure to the invader's energy beams and projectiles. This means, grasshopper, that its use against regular weapons is marginally compromised." Marginally was right. The Nergal had already absorbed enough hits to leave a star destroyer burning in space, and aside from occasional interference as the field automatically adjusted itself to compensate, had suffered no adverse effects. "So why don't you go fight them with your hatav?" Daishi asked as he switched Immortal Warrior back on. "You still don't get the big picture, do you kid?" Jerrard asked. "Robots aren't for fighting missiles, they're for fighting other robots. But wait till we get further out, that's when the real fun begins!" He struck up a dramatic pose. "Oh yeah baby! We'll be kicking invader butt galore once we get past the third defensive line!" "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" cackled the villain in the cartoon. "And this time no cook is going to upstage me!" Jerrard pronounced. Daishi shrugged. "Whatever floats your airspeeder, pal." Jerrard blinked once or twice. "Yeah..." he said hesitantly, not sure what Daishi's semi-archaic expression was supposed to mean. "I'll make sure that the Nergal gets through no matter what the cost might be, and you better not get in my way fryboy," he switched off the player, "or I won't show you the next episode." "What?" Daishi asked in surprise. "Wasn't episode six hundred and thirty seven the last episode?" "No," Jerrard replied with a superior tone, "they changed the timeslot and did another whole season after that, dork." The last he added to show that he wasn't a slouch himself at archaic expressions. Daishi got on his knees in supplication. "Oh I've got to see them, pretty please!" The other pilot smirked. "Alright then! But first promise that you'll stop stealing my spotlight!" ***** "As you know," Argon said to the command staff, assembled before the main holoprojector, "Erebria is surrounded by seven separate lines of defense. We will have to defeat each of these barriers to get out of the system." "Well we've already escaped the atmospheric defenses," Tycho said, "and our reports say that most of their ships in system are engaged with multiple skirmishes with the invaders. The current missile attacks are a part of the fourth line." Three more warheads slammed into the Nergal's retarded wave compression field, sending a minor shudder through the ship. "This is so tedious," Aku said. "Can't we just jump to lightspeed?" "Sorry," Stormtrooper 1026 said, "it's not that easy I'm afraid." Ruri took over the explanation. "Erebria is surrounded by a series of gravity well projectors that prevent a ship from passing through local space at lightspeed, which means we have to be much further away then normal in order to make a jump. Even if we could go to lightspeed now, these projectors are combined with an enormous network of shield emitters that project a shield that would essentially smash us to atoms if we crashed into it at lightspeed. As a result we will have to destroy enough of the shield emitters to give us room to pass." Tina continued, still wearing the short dress. "But before we can even get to that point, we have to get past the third and second defensive lines. Now in theory, our shields should be able to take everything the VE can throw at them..." A fairly large warhead detonation shook the ship, and Tina lost her balance on the spiked heels she wore, falling to the ground. "But they do seem to be weakening," Argon said as his captain yelped in pain. With Tina sprawled out on the deck, the short dress she wore did very little to cover her lower half. Kevin cleared his throat. "Perhaps you should change now, captain," he suggested. "Oh yeah," Tina replied, getting back to her feet, "good idea, but before that..." Tina left the bridge and headed out, a woman on a mission. She stopped in front of the door to Daishi's cabin as a small herd of ninja crept by. "My relationship with Robert has been on rather unsteady ground," she said to herself, paying the black clad urban game animals no heed. "However..." She opened the door, heedless of the lesson learned the last time she had just barged in. "ROOOOBEEEERT," she called sweetly. "KAI!" a voice yelled from within. "Huh?" Tina said to herself. The voice she heard didn't sound all that familiar. She entered the room... ...and found Daishi and the other pilot, Cox (or Cranston), sitting on the floor sobbing together. "What on earth are you doing in here?" she asked, puzzled. "That poor Kai!" Daishi cried, "He sacrificed himself, oh the humanity!" "You see it," the other pilot said with tears in his eyes, "You see it, don't you? You understand!" Tina looked at the cartoon that was playing on the vidscreen. "Thanks to the sacrifices of Kai Allard Liao," the announcer for the cartoon said, "Katherine Steiner has been driven back, but now, the tenth Lyran guards are missing a pilot!" "KAI!" a fairly short character cried again. "This is the way a man should go, man," the pilot said, still sobbing, "dying in battle for the sake of friends!" "Oh thank you, thank you for showing me the light!" Daishi replied. Tina sighed. "How can he pick that over me dressed like this?" ***** “How long are you going to keep us locked up like this?” a prisoner, one of the VE officers that had tried to mutiny with Ferrox, demanded. “This treatment is clearly a violation of all international prisoner of war conventions…” “If you don’t stop yapping about your rights,” Mr. Aniston said, “I’m going to have the Deathwookiee put you on the menu, so shut up and behave soldier boy.” He left the storeroom where it had been decided to keep the prisoners and shut the door behind him. “Well?” the officer asked another prisoner, who was hard at work on the bindings around his wrists. “Almost too easy,” the prisoner said, holding up his freed hands and the shard of durasteel he had used to sever his bonds. “I can’t believe they used rope in this day and age. What a bunch of amateurs.” “I’m really not in the mood to go on the Nergal’s little pleasure cruise to Varneck,” the officer said. “We’ll escape when the fighting breaks out.” ***** High above, on an orbital platform, another member of the Nergal's crew (or perhaps former member?) lamented his fate. "You must listen to me Narm," Admiral Riel Fury demanded over a comlink to the station's medical center. "You are a junior officer with a career in front of you..." "But I'm sworn to stop the Nergal at any cost, sir," Narm replied. Tina and Tycho had left him behind, having most likely just forgotten about him. This, combined with the way Tina seemed to... adore... Daishi, had been too much for him to forgive. "But to receive nanomachine treatment..." Riel Fury said with revulsion. The VEEC's direct neural interface was an incredible piece of technology, but at the same time it was an incredibly painful procedure. "He's right," the medic holding the nanoinjector said, "there's no reason for you to have this done." "It's of minor consequence, admiral," Narm replied. "The nanomachines will give me the edge I need to defeat the Nergal," and kill Daishi, he didn't add. "I've completely given up on Tina," Riel Fury said, "so please don't go!" Narm growled in anger. "Gimmie that!" he yelled at the medic, snatching the nanoinjector out of his hand. He jammed the injector into his arm and squeezed the trigger. Pain, unspeakable pain, ripped through his body as the nanomachines took up root in his central nervous system. Every part of his body writhed in agony, every neuron felt as though it were bathed in acid. Narm could feel the darkness clawing at his vision, but he knew he couldn't black out. The recipient had to remain conscious for the length of the procedure, or the nanomachines could not attune to him properly, and the direct neural interface would not work. Ironically enough, they could attune just fine to someone in REM sleep without the pain, but with the Nergal barely ten minutes out, he didn't have that kind of time. Narm almost didn't make it. The pain was unbearable, but he knew he had to get through this. He closed his eyes and focused on the only thing that really mattered to him anymore. Tina's smiling face. "Tina!" Narm gasped while on his hand a silvery design, the VEEC logo, began to materialize. The tattoo solidified, and the ordeal was over. Narm wasted a precious moment just laying there, catching his breath after such an ordeal. He wanted to lay there for the next few days, but he knew he didn't have time. He staggered to his feet. "Make sure the squadron is ready," he said to another officer present in the room. "We launch immediately." ***** "Alright now!" Jerrard yelled as he brought his hatav to full power and started it walking to the launch bay. "Get out of my way. Move it." In the background he could here Mr. Aniston trying to tell him something, but he ignored it. "Stand aside people, I take large steps. Jerrard Cranston, ace pilot, is ready to launch." "Hey," Aniston protested, "what happened to Daishi?" "Daishi?" Jerrard replied innocently, "he's in his room, crying like a baby. Oh well, more for me." "No I'm not," Daishi said from the catwalk. Jerry's hatav turned to give Daishi an accusing look. "We had a deal, fryboy!" Daishi shrugged. "I'm just a backup, remember? You get first crack." Ruri's voice came over the comm. "Nine TIE advanced are approaching from thirty degrees to port, as in left. Elevation is plus six degrees, distance is ten thousand meters, speed is eighty five MGLT." "That's my cue!" Jerrard cried out gleefully. "Hatav launching!" The war machine shot down the magnetic catapult and plunged into space. "Did he remember to take a weapon with him?" one of the engineers asked another. ***** In the cockpit of the lead TIE advanced, Narm sighed. "Here we go." His control stick stood inert and untouched before him. The direct neural interface allowed him to control his craft with a thought, improving his reaction speed dramatically. "Squadron, ATTACK!" **** "Ah, and here come the bad guys," Jerry said excitedly as he accelerated his hatav towards the TIE advanced squadron, "all of them in one big stinking pile!" Each TIE advanced seemed to be carrying a large number of external pods just under their solar panels. Jerry couldn't begin to puzzle out just what those were supposed to be, and he didn't really care. "Oh yeah, at long last I can show you how a real hero fights!" The external pods on the TIE advanceds started detaching and accelerating towards the Nergal. "You idiot!" Aniston yelled over Jerry's comm, "Those are warhead modules!" "Hey," Jerry said, "relax pall." The pods split open, each one revealing half a dozen proton torpedoes. Jerry soon found himself confronted by a swarm of over two hundred warheads. Fortunately (at least for him) they weren't targeting him. The weapons flew past, on their way to the Nergal. With their weapons launched, the TIE advanced squadron turned to face the lone hatav. "Okay, here they come!" Jerry yelled, then opened a comlink to the Nergal's launch bay. "Okay Aniston! Drop off the space mech external weapons module." A moment passed, and there was no answer. "Drop off the space mech external weapons module please!" "You can ask all you want," Aniston replied, "but this ship doesn't stock any of these battle-techy things." "Umm, maybe he means the heavy rifle for unit one?" a junior tech suggested. "Yeah," Jerry said enthusiastically, "that's it!" Aniston growled. "All right, here it comes," he said. "Just make sure you catch it." A relatively small object shot out of the Nergal's hangar bay, speeding towards Jerry's hatav. "This is great!" Jerry said to himself. One can almost see the crayon drawings as he thought about his plan. "I'll rush down below them and lure them in. The enemy thinks I don't have any weapons, but then I'll grab the launched external weapons module in mid air! I'll crush them all in one sweep! I'll call this plan Operation Killing Stroke!" The TIE advanceds continued their approach as Jerry ran down his rifle. Jerry's threat display lit up as the enemy started firing, but the gun was almost in reach. "Time to rock and roll!" Jerry yelled. "Lets go! KILLING STRO..." Laser cannon blasts tore into the rifle, blasting it to pieces. Tina's face appeared in Jerry's cockpit as she opened a communication link. "Hi!" she said, inconceivably cheerful. "Did the plan not work out exactly right?" Jerry waived off any concerns that Tina should have had. "Ain't no thing. MIND OVER MATTER!" The hatav turned to chase down the nearest enemy TIE, flying a dizzying array of evasive maneuvers as he danced out of the way of numerous laser blasts. As he closed in, he stretched out one of the hatav's hands. "JERRY SUPER WING RAKE!" he yelled as the machine's battle fist tore into the starboard solar panel. The fighter spun away out of control as the panel tore free. "This will do just fine." Jerry said, not really noticing the other eight fighters closing in on him. ***** "Mr. Cox is completely surrounded," Ruri reported to the rest of the bridge crew. Argon sipped his iced tea and turned to the holographic image of Daishi. "Its up to you now, Dai," he said. "Some hero," Daishi said as he readied his hatav for combat, "first he breaks his leg and now this." "Warheads now impacting," Ruri reported. The Nergal began to shake violently as dozens of proton torpedoes struck the retarded wave compression field. True to design, the field succeeded in shielding the Nergal from the vast majority of the hellish energies expended against it, collapsing quantum waveforms in such a way as to negate the effects (or something like that). This did nothing to prevent one serious consequence of the barrage, however. "DAMN YOU ARGON VIPER!" a now very drenched and very female helmsman (or woman) yelled. Argon's iced tea glass rolled around on the floor. "Umm... sorry Stormie," Argon said, "It was an accident." Argon had nearly lost his balance when the last warhead had hit, and had tossed his drink aside in order to grab a handhold. It wasn't his fault that the tea in the glass had ended up on Stormtrooper 1026. "H..h...how did you do that?" Aku asked, stunned that the person sitting next to her was suddenly a woman and a good deal better endowed than she was. "I don't want to talk about it," Stormie responded sullenly. She had hoped that she could keep this little secret quiet, but thanks to Argon's clumsiness that hope had gone right out the window. "Hmm..." Tycho said, more or less to himself, "If we could unlock the secrets of this procedure we could make a bundle on..." "That will be enough!" Tina declared in a surprisingly firm and commanding voice. "If you hadn't noticed, we are being attacked right now. Mind your duties. We can worry about the helmswoman's cross dressing later." "CROSSDRESSING?" Stormie hollered in protest. "I SAID MIND YOUR DUTIES!" Tina hollered in reply. Everyone, even Stormie, returned to their duties. Suddenly, a massive holographic image of Narm's helmet clad head appeared before the bridge crew. "Tina," he said, "this is your last chance. Return the Nergal to Erebria." "Its Narm!" Tina said with surprise. "How can he be accessing our holographic com system?" Stormie asked, momentarily forgetting her other problems. "He still has his communicator," Aku said. Argon looked at the holoimage, then frowned. "You're violating the terms of our contract," he said menacingly. "Tina, I'll stop you with force if I have to," Narm said. "If you don't turn around, the second defensive line will be focused on the Nergal." Though his pilot helmet hid his face, the growing desperation in his voice was evident. "Please! I don't want to fight you!" Tina sighed. "I'm sorry Narm, but I can't turn back now." "But why? Why must you do this Tina?" "I'm doing this because it's my job," Tina said. "I'm not just my father's daughter, Narm. I'm a captain in my own right. This is the only place where I can be myself. The real me." Argon blinked. "What does being yourself have to do with any of this?" he muttered under his breath. There were times when he thought that their captain was completely clueless. Narm growled. "You mean... because of him!" "Huh?" Tina asked, confused. "Pilot Daishi's hatav is now launching," Ruri reported. "Alright then!" Narm said. "That's that! We'll begin by destroying that hatav!" Tina glanced at Ruri, seeking an explanation. "The enemy fighters have pinned Mr. Cox's hatav with their tractor beams," the girl explained. "He has been rendered essentially immobile." Ruri punched a few buttons on her consol and a holographic image of the situation appeared. Six of the surviving TIE advanced had locked their tractor beams on Jerry's hatav, the pull of each carefully balanced, pining him in one location. It was an amazing feat of starfighter piloting to pull off, but somewhat worthless in normal combat. It was, however, perfect for this sort of an execution. The bridge crew watched as Narm brought his TIE to a halt and carefully lined up on the helpless hatav. "STOP IT!" another voice yelled. Waves of small concussion missiles and barrages from a heavy laser cannon ripped into the TIE advanceds, smashing two of them. With the careful balance of the tractor beams now literally shot to hell, Jerry's hatav slipped out of the net. Tina was the first one to realize what had happened. "Robert!" ***** "What are you doing!" Daishi transmitted to Narm's TIE. "We're your goddamned friends!" "You're not my friend!" Narm shouted defiantly as he brought his TIE back up to full speed, "you're my nemesis! I challenge you, Daishi!" "What?" "One on one, man to man!" Narm said, "and if I loose, I'll have my squadron withdraw!" "Yeah, do it!" Jerry suddenly shouted. He had been monitoring the exchange. "A circle of equals! That's the way real men should fight!" Daishi shook his head angrily. "I don't want to fight you!" "You lousy coward!" Narm shouted. "FIGHT LIKE A MAN!" The TIE advanced came at Daishi with its laser cannons blazing. Daishi used every ounce of his piloting skills, but he still didn't evade every shot. The hatav's shields took a few hits. "Stop it!" he yelled, "I don't want to fight you, Narm!" The other four TIE advanced were moving in to help their commander, but Jerry put his hatav between them and the duelers. "Oh no you don't," Daishi heard him say over the comm, "I'm your designated opponent. And don't you know that interrupting a duel of honor is nothing short of really rude? RIGHT?" The pilot began cackling insanely. Daishi had little time to contemplate the apparent weird battle lust Jerry had developed, as Narm came at him again. There had to be some way to handle this... Suddenly an idea (a somewhat desperate one) hit him. "Wait a minute," he transmitted to his opponent, "You're getting this all wrong, Narm. I'm not even interested in Tina. Cross my heart, space cook's honor!" "I don't believe you!" Narm shouted in reply, "and besides this has nothing to do with our personal lives!" Daishi growled. "Then why do you want to fight me so bad you moron, it makes no sense!" Narm buzzed past Daishi's hatav again, his laser cannons scoring a number of times on Dai's rear shields and nearly breaching them. Suddenly it just didn't seem so important to spare Narm's life anymore. "All right Narm!" Daishi yelled, "I'm sick of playing games with you! If you think the two of us hitting each other is going to solve our problems or win Tina's heart, then lets just get it on!" Daishi brought his hatav around and charged as Narm brought his own craft around for another pass. Laser cannon hits began striking Daishi's forward shields as he raked Narm's craft with his own weapon. Narm was good, damn good, but he was still a starfighter pilot trained to fly conventional craft, and he still had a starfighter pilot's mentality. There were certain maneuvers that he wouldn't expect. As Narm's TIE advanced shot past, Daishi stuck his hatav's arm out. In a move similar to the one Jerry had pulled earlier, the battle fist tore into one of the TIE's solar panels, tearing loose most of the panel and its two laser cannons. But Daishi wasn't done yet. With a thought, Daishi disengaged his hatav's propulsors and engaged his lateral thrusters. In a wonderful example of archaic physics, the hatav "went inertial", relying on inertia to keep moving in one direction while it quickly spun around to keep the TIE in its sights. Daishi opened fire, walking his cannon fire into the twin ion engines that gave the craft its name. The last of the TIE's shields buckled, and the engines went silent. "That's it, Narm, its over!" he announced. There was silence for some time before Narm answered him. "Well, why didn't you finish me off?" Daishi shook his head. "Because I've had enough of this idiocy," he said. "I'm going back to the ship to drink a bottle of scotch and get a bite to eat now. You can either stay there and sulk and think of new ways to try to kill me until you get rescued, or you can come with us, your choice." Another moment of silence passed. ***** "Recovery operations complete," Ruri reported as Daishi and Jerry finished hauling Narm's crippled TIE advanced aboard. "We are now passing the third defensive line." "The second defensive line has begun to lock weapons on to us," Aku reported. "They are ordering us to halt." "Understood," Tina said. "Increase speed to flank, and ready the point defense system." The Nergal shuddered as it came up to its maximum safe speed of 37 mglt. "Are the point defense systems really necessary, captain?" Tycho asked. "Those concussion missiles are very expensive, and so far nothing the VE has thrown at us has made so much as a dent." "Be that as it may," Tina responded, "our fields have still taken a terrific pounding, and have never really been tested before now. I see no reason to stress them any more than we have to." Tycho blinked a couple of times. He didn't really have a response to that. He still didn't know how to handle the captain when she acted sensibly. It was such a rare occurrence... "Second defense line platforms now launching warheads," Ruri reported. "Point defense system is active. Compression field reads at full strength." A few moments later the first miniature concussion missiles launched from the Nergal's point defense launchers. What followed was a duel fought entirely between the computers of the Nergal and the orbital defense platforms. The stations trying to saturate the Nergal's defenses with showers of missiles, while the Nergal's powerful organic computer system fought to catch every warhead. The Nergal couldn't stop every warhead however. The ship shook as this handful of leakers slipped through and plowed into the compression field one by one. The field, however, handled them just fine. "Now passing the second defense line," Ruri reported. "Three kilometers to the first defensive line. Shall I prepare the munchion cannon for firing?" Tina shook her head. "No. Continue on course." "Umm, captain," Stormie said. "If we do that we are going to slam into the deflector shield." "That will be fine," Tina said calmly. "Transfer additional power from weapons to the compression field." She smiled. "We don't need to bother with destroying the emitters. We'll just push through the shield." "What?" almost everyone on the bridge asked in surprise. "But captain," Tycho said, "didn't you just say that we shouldn't put more stress on the compression fields than we have to? Wouldn't it be more efficient to simply blast some of the emitters?" "More efficient in the short run, perhaps," Tina replied, "but we still have to consider the consequences. If we destroy the shield generators, it will open a hole in the big barrier that the enemy can use to attack Erebria just as easily as we use it to leave. On the other hand, if we simply push through the shield, the VE will be able to restore it much more easily." She gave each crewmember a mildly rebuking look. "No matter what has been happening over the last day, we all need to remember why we are doing this. If we are so irresponsible with our work that we leave those we intend to defend open to attack, then we might as well just turn the munchion cannon against Erebria." Kevin and a few officers nodded somewhat enthusiastically at the captain's words. Most of the remaining bridge crew shrugged fairly indifferently. "Impact with the first defensive line in thirty seconds," Ruri reported. The door to the bridge opened, and Daishi, Jerry, and Narm stepped through. "Ten seconds," Ruri reported. "Nine, eight, seven, six, five..." "Umm..." Daishi said as he watched the shield emitters grow larger and larger on the holographic screen, "shouldn't we be firing?" "Impact," Ruri reported as the Nergal struck the shield. The ship convulsed violently as the compression field clashed with the full power of the shield emitters. "Compression field is canceling out the local shield integrity." Ruri reported, "Estimate local shields will collapse in eight seconds. Compression field is stable." The shuddering suddenly stopped six seconds later as the shield collapsed. The Nergal pushed through into deep space. "We are now clear of the first defensive line," Ruri reported as emotionless as before. "Passing outside of the interdiction fields. We can now jump to lightspeed." "Alright then," Tina said. "Stormie, as soon as you get the calculations from the navcomputer, take us to lightspeed." She turned to the three pilots that had just entered the bridge. Narm looked down, not willing to look Tina in the eye. "Tina... I..." "Oh, you have nothing to apologize about," Tina said cheerfully. "I know you did what you did because you were worried about me as a friend. Right?" Narm looked up. There was just something about the way she was smiling sort of vacantly right now... "Well..." Apparently satisfied with that, Tina suddenly grabbed Daishi's hands. "And thank you Robert," she said happily, "thank you for not hurting my very best friend!" "Umm... I didn't save him just because he was your friend you know..." Daishi started to say, but Jerry interrupted, waving around a sheet of stickers. "Come on!" he said to Narm, "things are bound to get better as long as you're alive. Just make sure not to die looking better than me, alright kid?" "What are those things?" Narm asked, referring to the stickers. "Oh, these..." Daishi looked over Jerry's shoulder, and his face lit up. "Immortal Warrior stickers!" he exclaimed. "Yup," Jerry said proudly, "I took care of six bogies, so I'm gonna put six of these on my space mech." ***** “Come on, and keep it quiet,” the officer hissed as he and his fellow mutineers slipped into the now dark hangar bay. It had taken them longer than he had thought it would to get out of that storeroom, and by now the Nergal had already jumped to lightspeed. This meant, of course, that they couldn’t escape the ship until it left hyperspace. The best the mutineers had come up with was to hide out in one of the shuttlecraft until the Nergal broke out of lightspeed again, then make their escape. “Let me see,” someone else said from the other side of the hangar bay, “I wonder where I should put these now…” The officer turned to see who had said that, spotting a pilot next to one of the hatavs in the same instant he saw them. “Hey,” the pilot said, “who are you?” Without really thinking, the officer raised a blaster pistol and fired. The pilot was struck in the chest and fell to the deck. “I’m sorry… Miss Lear…” he said as his life leaked out of him, “It looks like I won’t be able to take you to the beach… like I promised…” His eyes closed for the last time. Almost immediately an alarm started blaring. “Oh crap!” the officer yelled. He pointed to the stormtrooper transport at one end of the bay. “Everyone in the transport, we’ll hold out there!” ***** “We have an unauthorized weapons discharge in the hangar bay,” Ruri reported. “What?” Tina said in surprise, “Show me.” A holographic image of the hangar bay materialized on the main holoprojector. At one end a group of people in VE uniforms were scurrying into a transport, while at the other end, Jerry Cranston lay unmoving. “The mutineers!” Argon hissed. “Damnit!” “I am detecting no life signs from Mr. Cox,” Ruri reported. “It appears that he is dead.” “Security teams,” Argon called over the comm. system, “the mutineers have escaped and entered the hangar bay. Deploy immediately.” “Wait,” Tina said suddenly. “Call them back.” “What? But captain, you can’t mean to let these criminals go…” Tina shook her head. “No. Not after murdering one of my crew. I have something else in mind for them.” Argon was about to protest, but stopped when he saw the fire in Tina’s eyes, and his force ability screamed of danger as he felt the anger and raw power suddenly flowing through her. This was no simple ditzy sixteen-year-old girl. Tina opened a comlink to the ship’s galley. “Deathwookiee,” she said to the spectre of all that is pure evil and chaos that also just happened to be the ship’s cook, “I have a job for you.” ***** The mutineers waited in their appropriated transport for the inevitable response, knowing they were living on borrowed time. There were a dozen different ways they could be killed by the Nergal’s security teams, and with all of one blaster pistol between them, there was little they could do to stop them. They couldn’t even leave the Nergal with the ship in hyperspace. The rear hatch began to slide open, forced by a feat of superhuman strength. The officer’s hand tightened on the grip of the blaster pistol as he raised it, intending to sell his life dearly. He wouldn’t get the chance, however. The weapon was wrenched from his grasp as though by an invisible hand and flew out the open door, clattering to the deck on the other side of the hangar bay. The officer might have laughed at what he saw next, if he hadn’t already known better. A wookiee, his hair spiked (the light was too dim to identify precisely what he used for hair gel), and wearing a chef’s hat, entered the transport, followed by a group of cute, cuddly girls smiling cheerfully and carrying an assortment of dental, medical, and power tools. “We’re going to play a little game,” the Deathwookiee said. “It’s called ‘does this hurt?’” Though they had to move out of the hanger bay after the first hour or so to a more secluded location to do their work, the screams of the mutineers would last for the next fifteen days. In the meantime, the Nergal continued on… TO BE CONTINUED! Don’t miss our next exciting episode as Daishi takes his hatav into the ever-expanding reaches of space! This episode will have everything! Love, drama, hot-blooded passion, excitement, and three, count em, THREE new cute girls for our beloved crew! Next Episode: Title is an unsolved mystery Don’t miss it!
 
-----------------------
"Catching fishies, catching fishies,"
"on a hook, on a hook,"
"Pull em out the water, fry them up in batter,"
"Yum yum good, yum yum good."

Hmm...interesting. I've gone from intelligence officer to...to...whatever role it is . Good story Daishi! Keep it up!
 
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Corporal Tycho Celchu, Slicer
Dread Knights, Vast Empire's Stormtrooper Corps
Union Representative of the Dread Knights
[email protected]
AIM: Tycho987
ICQ: 110585444

Huh boy, it's turning into an anime soap opera    Interesting stuff Dai 
 
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Argon Viper
IW COL Argon Viper{ret}
"History is on the move, those who cannot keep up will watch from a distance, and those who get in our way will not watch at all" - Grand Admiral Thrawn
"In combat, second place is only the last to die."- Anonymous
"Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses" - Carl G Jung
"The only thing that will never change is that everything will change" - Argon Viper

[That's classified] A lot of time has passed now. We picked up three new pilots at the station, and they fit right in, being just a braindead as the rest of us. And speaking of idiots, does anyone really want to know where this plot development between Aku and Daishi is going? It's hopeless! VARNECK INHERITOR NERGAL dubbed in English Episode 6: Desperate Journey Part One: Enter the Panda A lot happened during the four-day trip through hyperspace to Varneck. Unfortunately, budgetary and word limit concerns have forced us to cut out episode five, and you really didn't miss anything all that important. Allow me to give you a brief rundown. As is required by the VEEC's policies as an equal opportunity employer, funerals were held for all personnel killed when the station was destroyed. After a day of this, the Captain, who was responsible for conducting the ceremonies, was becoming a bit frazzled. A situation not helped by Aku, who took every opportunity to point out her new relationship with Daishi. At one point the dual stresses of trying to memorize a hundred different funeral customs and trying to grasp that Daishi might actually like someone other than her was too much for the captain, and she fled to the meditation room, where she managed to put herself into a trance that lasted the better part of three days, and judging by the shouting coming from the room, included a number of very interesting hallucinations. Tycho and Argon agreed that it was better not to disturb the captain when she was in this state, and placed Narm in charge of finishing the funerals. Ruri identified Aku as a very cruel person, to which Aku replied "I am what I am." Daishi, still conflicted about his purpose on the Nergal, wishing to be a cook but seemingly trapped in the life of a pilot, decided to seek answers through meditation since nothing else seemed to be working. He was not aware that the captain had been in the meditation room for the past two days. In the meantime, with the ship in hyperspace there was very little for the crew to do. The ping pong table didn't provide much entertainment after a while, and believe it or not, the thousand odd episodes of immortal warrior left behind by Jerry Cranston didn't actually take all that much time to watch, if for no other reason than most people could not watch too much before wanting to flee. With these distractions pretty much exhausted, a few of the crew took to reading their contracts with the VEEC. Aniston was the first to read his contract and, suddenly discovering what he had signed, immediately called for a mutiny. With nothing better to do, most of the crew agreed, and this is properly where our story begins. ***** "Cast aside my worldly passions, cast aside my worldly passions, cast aside my worldly passions..." Tina repeated over and over. She hovered in a sitting position, eyes closed, a good half a meter above the deck. The door slid open, but Tina, lost in her chant, didn't hear it. "What the hell..." Daishi began to say as he saw Tina hovering before him. The captain's eyes opened at the sound of Daishi's voice, and her body spun so that she could face him, though she still hovered a half meter above the deck. "Robert!" she cried happily. "Is this the real thing?" "What are you doing in here?" Daishi asked. "I was fighting with my worldly passions in order to reach enlightenment, my dearest," Tina said excitedly, "and then you appeared before me!" "Wait a minute!" Daishi cried, "I'm not your worldly passions, I'm a guy with issues that need resolving!" "I understand perfectly," Tina said, "You're saying that you like me!" "DO YOU EVEN LISTEN TO YOURSELF?!?" "Of course, my intuition never lies." Tina held out her arms. "And now, like a thunderbolt, everything has become clear! YES! But this isn't carnal attraction, it's much much greater!" The moment (?) was interrupted, however, as one of the meditation droids rolled up behind Tina and bopped her soundly on the head with a bamboo cane. "Worldly passions bad, worldly passions bad," the little droid chanted. "You must cast aside such distracting thoughts. Such indulgence is bad, cast aside your worldly passions..." Daishi snatched the bamboo cane from the droid and beat it into scrap. "Who asked you?" he yelled. "Oh Robert!" Tina cried, "you really do love me!" For a moment it looked like she was going to jump him right then and there. "Now hold on a second..." Daishi began to say. Fortunately fate (or rather Mr. Aniston) picked this moment to interrupt. Aku's holgraphic image appeared between Tina and Daishi. "Captain, we have a mutiny!" she said. ***** Tina, Daishi, Stormie (in female form) and Narm entered the bridge to see Mr. Aniston, the En Pee Sees, and most of the engineering staff holding guns on Ruri and Aku. Kevin sat in a chair at one corner of the bridge sipping on some of his non-regulation tea. "We're really sorry about this, Aku," Generec En Pee See Two was saying. "Okay, just what is this all about?" Tina asked the assembled mutineers. Aniston held up his contract. "What I don't understand is why you would tell us about the free funerals but you wouldn't tell us about this! It's deceptive and unethical!" "But isn't everything explained in the contract?" Tina asked. "Oh come on!" Aniston growled. "Who in this day and age ever reads the entire contract?" He tossed the contract to the captain, who began to examine it. "Well?" Aniston said. "It IS rather small type..." Tina admitted. "Go on," Generec En Pee See One said, "read the smallest one, at the bottom." "While the VEEC cannot condone relationships between employees," Tina read, "in order to maintain public morality, no physical intimacy beyond holding hands will be permitted." She looked up. "Just what is this?" "That's why we're upset," One said. "Yeah," Aniston agreed, "it's ridiculous. Does the VEEC really believe we will be content to just hold hands? Is the Nergal a preschool full of children who can't handle their own affairs? I'm still young you know." "You are?" Daishi asked. "Yes, I am!" Aniston snapped. "Well tough," Tycho said as he and Argon arrived on the bridge. "DO WE LOOK LIKE CELIBATES TO YOU?" "Sexual relationships aren't allowed here. The ship just isn't equipped for it." Tycho chuckled. "As you said, the Nergal is not a preschool, and we don't offer day care either." "I've had enough of your tyranny!" Aniston shouted. "Extend not your puritan morality to the freedom of space! Asking us to subsist on holding hands in cruel and inhuman! IT WOULD ALMOST BE BETTER TO BE STUCK BACK ON EREBRIA WITH MY FRIGID WIFE!" "Well, you did sign a contract..." "SHUT UP!" Aniston and the En Pee Sees raised their pistols. "We're unsigning it!" "I think you should read the paragraph above it again," Tycho said as the sound of a bell dinging announced the Nergal's imminent emergence from hyperspace. "What next?" Tina asked herself. The Nergal emerged from lightspeed. Kevin drained the contents of his tea glass. "Well, here we are," he said. Suddenly everyone was thrown to the deck as a massive beam of charged particles struck the Nergal's compression field. "What was that?!" someone shouted in terror. "Ruri," Tina called, "are the fields still up?" "Yes captain," Ruri replied. At first she seemed to be staring off into space, but Tina could tell that she was in fact linked directly to the computer through her own direct neural interface. She was, in essence, seeing with the ship's eyes. "But we're in trouble. That blast wave wasn't a probe. The enemy is preparing to attack." Unseen to all but Ruri and the Nergal's organic computer system, a massive warship stood in the ship's path. Tina got to her feet. "All right people," she said, "I am well aware of your problems with your contracts, but now is not the time to deal with it! Unless we can pull together and function as a team, people are going to get killed. And if people get killed that will mean more funerals and I will never, NEVER let that happen again! I'D EVEN RATHER DO WEDDINGS!" All thoughts of mutiny seemed to melt away as the crew went to battle stations. ***** The hatavs were launched as soon as they were ready for combat. The four humanoid craft were badly outnumbered by the invader fighters, but it didn't seem to worry the pilots all that much. "You wanna piece of me?" One asked as she flew into the fray, blazing away with her weapons. Invader fighters shattered right and left under her onslaught, their heavy armor poor protection against the accuracy of the pilot's attacks. "Two!" she yelled, "connect the dots!" "Got it!" Two replied, launching off a score of concussion missiles that struck down several invader fighters. "Now that's a pretty picture!" she began to laugh, joined soon enough by Generec En Pee See Three. Three suddenly stopped laughing. "Lets keep our head, or we'll be dead," she said. "What brought that on?" One wanted to know. "Well, we were kind of showing off..." Two admitted. "This ship is but a shell," Three continued, "its hull lies in vacuum hell. No imperial slug nor alien race chills my bones as cold as space! Or something like that." Three took a moment to slaughter a few more of the enemy fighters. "I'm sorry, sometimes I get moody." Engaged in his own battles, Daishi could only shake his head. "Is everyone in this firefight screwing around except me?" Suddenly the space around them was filled with brilliant shafts of light as the invader warship opened fire. ***** Dozens of beams struck the Nergal's compression field, and the ship shuddered violently under the bombardment. Despite this, the Nergal continued on, unharmed. "Captain," Kevin said with a hint of nervousness in his voice, "I think you should recall the hatavs." "Its not necessary, sir," Tina replied, then turned her attention back to the holoimage of the unfolding battle. "Come on, Robert!" she yelled, cheering on her favorite pilot. "But..." Kevin began to say. "The enemy is equipped with charged particle cannons," Tycho said to the admiral. "Is that what's worrying you?" He chuckled slightly. "Our compression field and offensive weapons are far more advanced. They can't even touch us. As long as we hold the technological advantage we are nearly invulnerable." "Anomalous readings, captain," Ruri reported. "I am detecting a shield protecting the invader warship." ***** "What?" One said as she heard the report. The fighters had been cleared out and they had moved in to go after the invader warship, only to find their weapons literally bouncing off its shields. "I thought the invaders didn't use shields! We can't get through it." "What are we gonna do?" Two asked. We're really stuck." All four pilots thought for a while. It was Daishi who finally came up with an idea. He drew his hatav's vibroknife (a hatav scale dagger) and charged. "Daishi!" One yelled, "that's crazy!" "It's suicide!" Two added. "No, it's not!" Daishi said as he flew a dizzying evasive pattern to evade fire from the warship. "It's just a question of picking the right angle!" Daishi stabbed into the shield with the knife. The field, normally not visible, glowed with energy as it began to warp under the pressure of Daishi's attack. "ARRRRG! COME ON!" Daishi yelled. The shield suddenly gave way, and Daishi buried the knife and a good part of the hatav's forearm in the hull of the invader warship. He pulled the weapon out and aimed his heavy lasercannon into the hole he had made. "PARTICLE CANNON!" He yelled as he fired into the warship's bowels. The ship began exploding from the inside, and Daishi decided it was time to head home. ***** "The enemy battleship has now been destroyed," Ruri reported. "No other contacts detected. Atmospheric entry is now possible." A holoimage of an approach vector appeared before her, and with a slight wave of her hands she sent it over to Stormie. "Coordinates." Stormie winked at her. "Thank you Ruri-Ruri," she said cheerfully. "Huh?" Stormtrooper 1026 was not acting like he (she?) normally did, and Ruri couldn't help but wonder if this was some other unseen side effect of the curse that was afflicting her. "Is everybody ready?" Stormie asked, "It might get a little bumpy." "Recall the Hatavs," Argon said. "Already done." ***** Daishi stood in front of the soda machine trying to decide on something to drink while the techs racked his hatav. He had really expected more from the enemy than just one warship and thirty or forty fighters. The lack of real opposition worried him to some extent, but whatever happened, he was confident they could handle it. Erg Headslammer Buzz Cola seemed like a good choice. Daishi made his selection and was about to insert his debit card when One beat him to it. "Nope," she said, "I'll buy." Daishi felt an arm grab him and spin him around. Two stood before him now wearing googly-eyed glasses. "You left us with our eyes bugging out." She said. "You knocked us dead," Three added. "Don't let the junior geek bother you," One said as she handed Daishi his soda, "you did good." ***** "I am detecting unusually high amounts of particulate matter in the atmosphere," Ruri reported. "That is to be expected," Kevin said with a hint of sadness in his voice. "It will take years for all the particulate matter stirred up during the first battle to filter back to the ground." "I don't understand," Tina said. "I thought the first battle of Varneck was fought almost entirely in space." "It was," Kevin said, but didn't elaborate until Ruri's next report gave him no choice. "Captain, I am detecting another ship in the atmosphere," she said. "It is not active and appears to be grounded, but sensors say its mass is comparable to one of the invader dreadnoughts." "Is it trying to ambush us or something?" Argon asked. "No," Kevin said bitterly. "That ship you are detecting was the flagship of the invader fleet during the first battle of Varneck. It crashed into the planet after the defenders rammed a star destroyer into it." "But that means..." Narm began to say. "Ruri, give me a full scan of the surrounding territory," Tina ordered. "Aye, captain," Ruri replied. The scan took several minutes, but it confirmed what everyone feared. "The force of the invader dreadnought's crash seems to have left a crater several hundred kilometers across and completely devastated the planet. The effect of the impact must have been on the order of twenty thousand megatons, and there is little hope that anything on the surface survived." She brought up a holoimage of the planet's surface, and the bridge crew of the Nergal got their first view of the blasted wasteland of Varneck. Kevin was the only one who was not captivated by the devastation displayed before them. He turned away and left the bridge. ***** "My god," Daishi said as he saw what had become of his homeworld for the first time. Aku slipped her hand into his and gave it a reassuring squeeze. At first he was happy for the comfort, but he couldn't shake the feeling that Aku had her own motives in mind other than easing Daishi's pain. Tina didn't seem to notice what passed between Aku and Daishi. "We've all seen by now what has happened to Varneck," she said to the assembled bridge crew and pilots. "But I don't believe that this is an excuse to give up all hope of finding survivors." Tycho nodded, then took over the briefing. "Our first stop will be an underground VEEC research center in the mountains east of here." "That figures," One said, "Business first, is that it?" "Actually," Tycho replied, ignoring the sarcasm in One's voice, "the facility was built to survive massed orbital bombardment and to serve as a survival shelter." Argon was next. "Now, for the landing party..." he began to say. Daishi let go of Aku's hand and stepped forward. "Excuse me, but I'd like to borrow a hatav." "For what?" Argon asked. "I want to see my home again," Daishi said. "I don't know," Tycho said. "The entire planet has been completely devastated. I'm not sure what you intend to accomplish..." "I just want to see it again," Daishi repeated. "This planet is not secure," Argon pointed out, "It's too dangerous." "Well," Tina said, "Maybe we could..." "Let him go," another voice spoke up. Kevin stepped into the circle of officers. "But sir..." Argon began. "I know I'm just a figurehead," Kevin said, "but I'm still technically in charge here. I think Daishi can take care of himself for a while." "Thank you sir," Daishi said as he left for the hangar bay. Nobody noticed Aku slipping out to follow him. ***** Aniston didn't complain too much when Daishi said he was taking a hatav for a spin. Just some things about not breaking his lovely machine, and "treat it like your girlfriend, not your sister", whatever that was supposed to mean. Of course, Aku's sudden appearance in the hangar bay did cause some problems. "Hey!" a tech said as Aku ran across the bay towards Daishi's machine. "You're not supposed to be down here!" The communications officer paid the tech no heed as she climbed aboard Daishi's machine. "I don't get it!" Aniston yelled as he grabbed the tech by the collar. "Why does he get all the chicks?!?" "I don't know, sir," the tech replied, "they say those who are most unlikely..." "UNLIKELY!" Aniston began shaking the tech violently. Daishi in the meantime was surprised to see Aku worming her way into the hatav's cramped cockpit. "What are you..." he began to say. "I thought you could use some company," Aku replied. "Besides, I'd like to see..." a hesitant pause, "your roots." ***** As the hatav launched, Tina fumed at the empty communications station. "We could court-martial her!" she said angrily. "Right?" "I don't know if it's a big deal, captain," Stormie said. "It's not like we need her right now, do we?" Tina growled. "Well, no, but its the principle..." She suddenly got to her feet and moved towards the door. "Leaving, captain?" Kevin asked. "Oh, umm..." Tina sputtered, then got an idea. "I know! Narm could take command for a little bit," she turned towards her first officer with a 'could you do this little thing for me' smile on her face, "couldn't you, Narm?" Narm frowned. "Not without a good reason." Tina frowned herself, but soon got another idea. She pulled a little plush Immortal Warrior doll out of her pocket and set it on her chair, dropping her captain's hat on it. "That oughta do it!" she announced, then saluted. "Victor, take command!" Narm grabbed the doll and tossed it aside. "Are you nuts!?" The doll landed on Ruri's computer console. The twelve-year-old picked up the plush toy and looked at it, almost actually breaking out into a smile. "You'd probably do a better job," she said. ***** "This doesn't look good," One said. The landing party had flown a transport out to the site. The facility appeared to have weathered the impact of the invader ship perfectly fine, but... "It looks like this place was abandoned a long time ago." "So what was the VEEC doing way out here in the middle of nowhere anyway?" Two asked. "Discovering the Nergal," Tycho said matter of factly. "What?" almost the entire landing party said in unison. "Okay," Tycho said. "That isn't exactly accurate, but this is where it all began, in this place. Would you like to see?" He nodded in the direction of the armored doors at the back of the room. The doors accepted the code Tycho entered, revealing a massive chamber dug ten kilometers below the surface. In the center of the chamber was a massive object of unknown design and purposes. "It's been about fifteen years since Imperial scientists discovered this thing, and even then with everything else going on at the time, there was never really any effort to study it. It was only when Geist was running Special Projects that we had a chance to decipher its secrets." "What is it?" Argon asked. He knew only some of the details, just as much as the VEEC had decided he needed to know. As a consequence this was all largely new ground for him. "It's a transmitter, of sorts," Tycho replied, "operating on principles that are utterly alien to us. All of the advanced technology we have on the Nergal, the munchion cannon, the compression field, all of it was based on what we learned from studying this transmitter." "Well who built it?" One asked. Tycho shrugged. "We don't know. All we know is that this is not the only one in existence. Others have been found on Erebria, Lotaith, and an otherwise uninhabited planet in the Coruscant system. It's possible that there is a transmitter on every planet in the galaxy. We just don't know where to look for most of them." "What is it supposed to transmit?" Argon asked. It annoyed him for a moment that Tycho knew so much but didn't feel obligated before now to say anything. Sometimes he acted too much like the spook he used to be. "It appears to simply be a communications device," Tycho said. "In fact, its a relatively minor piece of this technology." "A minor piece?" an anonymous officer asked. "You mean there's more?" Tycho smiled. "That is something for another time. We've pretty much confirmed that there is nobody here, so we should head back to the Nergal." ***** "I can't believe it's all gone," Daishi said as he studied the ruins of his family's home, his hatav standing nearby with the cockpit open. There was virtually nothing left, and what there was was buried under a meter of loose dirt. Aku leaned against Daishi, her head resting on his shoulder, his arms around her waist. "I'm sorry for your loss," she said. "I can't imagine how this has affected you." Daishi enjoyed the idea of the beautiful woman in his arms right now, but at the same time he still couldn't chase away this nagging feeling... "Why does the captain call you Robert?" Aku suddenly asked. "It's my given name," Daishi replied. Not many people knew that. Daishi wasn't sure how Tina had found out. "It's a nice name," Aku replied, giving Daishi a squeeze. "How long have you known the captain?" "A couple of years," Daishi answered, wondering at the sudden change in subject. "I first met her when Geist smuggled her into the barracks." Daishi could feel Aku stiffen slightly at the mention of Geist. "What does that pirate have to do with Tina?" she asked. "I thought she was an admiral's daughter." Daishi almost felt the urge to chuckle when Aku called Geist a pirate. "It's sort of a long story." Strangely enough, the more he talked about Tina, the more he felt uneasy holding Aku like this. He began to pull away from her. "I don't think I should talk about it." "What's wrong?" Aku asked, "Why did you pull away from me like that?" "It's nothing..." Daishi said, wondering if he meant that or not. Aku turned away from Daishi. "You know, when I quit my last job, I was looking for something. I was looking for someone real, responsible, and focused on a goal. Someone like you... Robert, that's why..." She turned around, only to find that Daishi was nowhere to be seen. "Robert?" Just then, the ground gave out under her (just as it had for Daishi) and she fell into a cavern, landing on her rear with a muffled thump. "Ow, that hurt," she said. "Robert, where are you... AHHHG!" The last scream was uttered when she spotted the furry creature in the heavy cloak approaching her. Though the cloak obscured most of its features, the menacing claws on the hands and the black and white fur that covered its face was unmistakable. The creature stopped to study Aku, and for a moment she expected it to try to devour her. Instead it held up a sign. "He's on the planet Varneck," the sign read. The creature turned the sign around. "I think you should get off your boyfriend now," the sign on the back said, "he's turning blue." Aku looked down to see Daishi pinned under her. The creature held up another sign. By now it was obvious that it used these signs as a means of communication. "I don't know whether to welcome you or to throw you out, so I think I'll compromise by offering you some of my homemade gin." The creature motioned with one paw for the pair to follow him. Both agreed. The trio entered a larger underground facility, and Daishi and Aku were surprised to see dozens of people gathered around makeshift fires, standing guard, taking care of children. Through the darkness could be heard the movement of small herds of ninja. The creature held up another sign after giving each Nergal crewmember a glass of gin that smelled like jet propellant. "I supposed that I should explain things," it read, "this is all that's left. All the survivors from all over Varneck have gathered here. Fortunately the invaders don't seem too interested in people." "I can't believe it!" Daishi exclaimed. "After seeing what had happened to the planet I was afraid there wouldn't be anyone left! We can get you out of here now! I've got to call our ship..." He stopped when the creature held up another sign. It said simply "We're not leaving." "What?" Aku asked with surprise, "why not?" "That would require a long explanation," the next sign read. "I'll settle for the short version." Aku replied. "Down here at least there's a chance for survival. Your ship will never escape Varneck." "Look!" Aku snapped. "We fought hard to get here, and you have no idea how powerful the Nergal is." The creature held up one more sign. "Care to bet your life on that, girlie?" The creature walked over to one of the fires and borrowed a kettle of hot water. To the surprise of both Daishi and Aku, it then poured the contents of the kettle onto its head. When the creature turned around again, it was no longer a strange animal that stood before them. "Hey Daishi," Jociam Geist, retired Director of the VEEC special projects division and designer of the Nergal, said. "Been a while. So how did you get hooked up with this girl?" Lost in his surprise, Daishi wouldn't have had much of a chance to reply anyway, as the cavern began to shake. ***** "Rooobeeert, Roooobeeeert," Tina called out over the ships external comm, her voice echoing across the countryside. The Nergal hung suspended on repulsorlifts near where Daishi's hatav was standing. Three figures appeared emerging from some hidden doorway. Tina did not need any magnification system to recognize her dearest as he, Aku, and one other appeared on the holographic display. "Oh, there you are Robert, she said with a great deal of cheer, "we were worried about you, so we came to find you." "Worried about what, I won't ask," Ruri muttered under he breath. "And who's that with you?" the captain continued. "Wait, is that uncle Yo-sim?" she asked, using her own slightly mauled pronunciation of Geist's first name. "It is! I'm so happy to see you, uncle Yo-sim!" "We're coming aboard," Geist said using Daishi's communicator. He had a feeling she wouldn't be so happy when she heard what he had to say. ***** "In other words, go away, we don't want to be saved," Kevin said angrily, "is that what you're saying?" "That is correct," Geist replied. He stood on the Nergal's bridge before the entire bridge crew. "All of the survivors have agreed that they want to stay here. It is their opinion that boarding the Nergal for the trip out of here would be suicide. And as this ship's designer I agree with them! The Nergal will not survive this mission." "Oh come on!" Argon protested. "We've beaten the invaders in every exchange of fire thusfar. We'll be quite safe." Geist shook his head. "Military arrogance at work," he said. "What do you really know about the invaders? Do you have any idea how advanced their technology is? Why are they here? What are their goals?" "So you're just going to give up!" Daishi shouted angrily. This was not like Geist at all. "We're not," Geist replied, "you're the ones who won't face the facts." He turned to face Daishi and Aku, who more or less stood together. "Your actions are so predictable. You may think you've had some success, but have you really?" Aku made a swallowing sound, as though she had noticed a sub-plot to Geist's last statement that made her uneasy. "You know, you can only analyze so much," she said nervously. "Right now you’re letting your hormones cloud your judgement, little girl," Geist said with a lot more contempt than seemed necessary. There was obviously some bad blood between him and Aku. "Not everyone can be a hero." "That will be enough." Tina suddenly said in a commanding voice she only rarely used. Geist turned to face her, and the two locked eyes for an instant. Geist smiled ever so slightly, as though pleased about something. "Captain," Ruri interrupted, "Sensors have detected a new contact." "What?" Tina said, "show me." A holographic image of the surrounding terrain appeared on the main projector. Fifteen kilometers away, a massive ovoid shape hovered motionless in the air, one end pealed open like a banana. The bridge crew watched in amazement as the first invader warships began emerging from the craft. "How can it hold so many ships?" Stormie asked, her voice carrying a hint of fear. "They aren't coming out of it," Geist said, "They're coming through. That ship is actually a dimensional gate. There's no way to know how many ships are on the other side, waiting for the order to advance." "Captain, the enemy has more ships moving in from orbit," Ruri reported dispassionately. "Engage the munchion cannon!" Tina ordered. "Fire!" The characteristic puff of smoke appeared at the Nergal's bow, however, much to the horror of the crew, the blast seemed to have no effect. "How can they withstand a full blast?" Tina asked herself in surprise. "You see, the enemy also has compression fields," Geist said. "So much for a quick and easy victory." "The enemy continues to reinforce from the gate," Ruri reported, "The ships in orbit are taking up a geosyncronous orbit over our position." "Their shields can't be invincible," Argon said, "go to continuous fire!" "We can't," Ruri reported. Geist nodded gravely. "We aren't in a vacuum, Argon. The munchion cannon's power system cannot generate enough power to support continuous fire." "So what are we supposed to do now?" One asked nobody in particular. "There's no way we can fight that many, is there?" Two asked. "Bring up the compression field!" Tina ordered. "WAIT!" Aku suddenly yelled. "If we raise the field now, the pressure will cause the underground complex under us to collapse. If that happens, everyone in the shelter will be killed!" "Stormie," Tina said, the desperation in her voice becoming more and more apparent, "Take us up and raise the field!" "We can't!" Stormie said with horror, "It will take us five minutes to build up enough power to move!" "Either raise the shield or take on the enemy's attack without it," Geist said. "Admiral," Tycho said to Kevin, "I think this decision is too much for our captain to make." "We have no choice," Kevin said. "But what about those people?" Aku asked in horror, "Robert and I promised we would help them! How can you betray them like this? They're all going to die!" Daishi turned to look at Tina. The pair's eye's locked. "Ruri..." Tina began to say. "The enemy is in position, weapons are charging," Ruri reported. "Captain?" "This is no time for indecision," Argon said. "Engage the fields now!" "The captain has still not given the order, sir!" Ruri protested. "They're preparing to fire!" "Raise the field." Tina said it so quietly, that at first most of the bridge crew wasn’t even certain that she had said it. Ruri wasted no time, however. The field energized. Below the Nergal the ground was crushed under the force of the quantum energies unleashed. Barely half a second later, the enemy opened fire. Hundreds of spears of energy fell on the Nergal from every direction. "Our fates were sealed when the first invader warships appeared," Geist said. "Even without the shield the shelter would have been destroyed by this barrage. At least this way it came quickly." He turned to Tina. "We all knew this day would come, Tina. Nobody expected you to be able to save us." It was obvious that Tina was going to be sick, but she stayed at her post. "Ruri," she said weakly, "maintain field integrity..." ***** An hour later, the Nergal was clear of the enemy, but they were in dire straits. The sheer volume of fire had been enough to breach the compression field a number of times, inflicting severe damage to the ship. The effects of the attack on the captain, however, might have been far more severe. Daishi found her in the washroom, leaning over a sink. "Why did we come here, Robert?" she asked softly without looking in his direction. "What was the point? We didn't save anyone. I couldn't save anyone. I failed." "Tina..." Daishi said, laying one hand on her shoulder. Tina turned and took his hand in hers. "This is the first time you've been nice to me," she said, "since you came aboard this ship." "Stop it!" Daishi pleaded quietly. "Pull yourself together." "Robert," she said, still refusing to look Daishi in the eye. "Please, kiss me." "Tina!" Daishi said, surprised, "I don't think this is the time..." "Oh no, I don't mean for you to kiss me the way you kiss Aku." "What?" Somehow the idea that Tina had seen him kiss Aku filled Daishi with dread. "You saw that? That was just..." "I don't care," Tina said, "It doesn't matter." She raised her head to gaze into his eyes. "I just want something that means that there's still hope." Daishi suddenly found himself unable to meet her gaze. He turned away from her and hurried out of the room. "I'm sorry," he said as fled. Tina walked out of the washroom soon after, only to be confronted by Aku. There was fire in the communications officer's eyes. "Excuse me, Tina." Aku said angrily. "I don't care if you are the captain. I'm not going to loose!" Tina seemed almost confused for a second, but then her expression suddenly brightened. "And I'm not going to loose either!" she said. This was enough to give Aku the confused look. "We're all going to beat those invaders together!" Tina continued. "No sir, they're not going to keep me down!" She began walking back to the bridge. "But that's not what I meant!" Aku protested as she followed her captain. "Please let me explain what I meant!" TO BE CONTINUED! It was thought that the Nergal was invincible, but now the ship is crippled and stranded on an inhospitable world surrounded by enemies! How can our brave crew escape the dangers that surround them and the specters of their own pasts? Make sure you're here for our next exciting episode because it could be our last! Next Episode: Desperate Journey Part 2: The song you will sing one day
 
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"Catching fishies, catching fishies,"
"on a hook, on a hook,"
"Pull em out the water, fry them up in batter,"
"Yum yum good, yum yum good."

Perhaps our biggest mistake was assuming we could win. But when the invaders launched their ambush we knew that could never happen. If we could have traded our lives for those of the survivors, we would have fought to the death, but such was not to be. VARNECK INHERITOR NERGAL dubbed in english Episode 7: Desperate Journey Part 2: The song you will sing one day "Three!" "Two!" "One!" "KABLOOIE!" On the screen, little smilling cutouts of Ruri in cute little overalls and Tina in a fluffy bunny suit flew through the air. The title screen came down next. "It's time to get to know the Nergal!" an announcer declared. The picture changed again, replaced by an actual Tina in a fluffy bunny suit and Ruri in adorable overalls. "Hi everyone!" the Tina bunny said cheerfully, "this is miss Ruri, and she's going to tell you all about the Nergal!" "Whatever," Ruri said. There was an important distinction between the live Ruri and the cardboard cutout that had graced the opening. The live one wasn't smiling. "To begin with, do you know what makes the Nergal fly through space?" ***** On the ship's bridge, Argon growled and stormed out of the room. Narm found himself captivated by Tina in her fluffy bunny suit. "Oh, she's so cute!" he declared, then did his best to avert his eyes. "NO, I MUST RESIST!" "Ruri looks so cute in those overalls," Stormie said, still in her female form. "The sad part is I used to do shows like this," Aku said, "only worse." ***** "Okay miss rabbit person," Ruri was saying, "since you asked, lets talk about the Nergal's quantum pulse engine." Tina seemed a bit confused as Ruri moved on to the next scene. "Wait a minute, I still have lines, don't I?" Ruri ignored her and plunged on, obviously interested in getting this over with. "Are you familiar with the principles of impulse?" she asked her rabbit co-host. Tina sort of scratched her head. "Well, umm, no miss Ruri," she said. "I'm just a rabbit you know." Ruri turned away from the camera and to the holographic crayon drawing of a rocket ship that was serving as an example. "The basic principle is simple enough to grasp and has been understood for tens of thousands of years. This principle is that when you apply force to an object, it applies an equal but opposite force to you. The most ancient of spacecraft used this principle as a form of propulsion; shooting fuel out the back of the spacecraft caused it to go forward. However this method was never as efficient as later forms of propulsion, because..." "Hold it, Ruri," another voice said. Geist shut down the camera. "This program is being made for little children," he said, "so read from the script like you're supposed to, face the camera, and for goodness sake, smile." "Smile?" Ruri asked, uneasy with the idea. "Yeah, Ruri," Tina said, "just relax and pretend like you're a normal kid." "All right," Geist said, "lets try this again." The door to the studio opened, and Argon stormed in. "What is going on in here?" he demanded. "Just what is the idea of this ridiculous stunt, Geist? If you didn't know we are in serious trouble. Our compression field is unstable, and our engines can't produce enough thrust to even get us out of the atmosphere! Is making this video your idea of a sick joke?" "No," Geist said. "My idea of a sick joke is this so called rescue mission." "Please," Tina pleaded, "Uncle Yo-sim is making this film to help keep the crew's morale up. I know I can never be forgiven for my failures, but we can't let this crew collapse into despair. Please, let us film." "Idiot!" Ruri uttered. Geist shook his head. "There's nothing to forgive since you were operating under false information," he said. "If anything, the blame falls on the VEEC for sending you here. This must be what happens when I'm not around to keep them honest." He shrugged. "Well, let's continue with the filming, shall we?" Argon ceased his protests as Ruri and Tina got ready to do the scene again. When Geist started the camera rolling, Argon leaned towards him. "Crew morale?" he asked quietly. "It will keep the crew's mind off of our problems," Geist replied, "at least for a while." "I could think of a better show for Tina to do," Argon said with an evil grin. Geist gave Argon a look that was at least half warning. "You want to suggest it to her?" Argon accepted the warning gracefully and backed down. As harmless as the captain seemed most of the time, there were times every now and then... Argon suddenly realized that Geist was holding something out for him to take. He looked down to see a pair of bunny ears in Geist's hand. "Not a chance..." he began to say, but stopped as Geist nodded at him. "Now wait a minute," Argon said somewhat weakly. "You aren't my boss any more. I don't have to do anything you say... The one time director of Special Projects just smiled evily at Argon. "Put them on," he said. ***** "I just want something that means that there's still hope," Tina was saying. She looked up and gazed into Daishi's eyes. "Just take me now, Robert!" Daishi awoke with a start. "WHAAAA!" He blinked, trying to clear the cobwebs of sleep and the dream from his eyes. "Oh god no," he uttered to himself. "There's no way I'm interested in that nutcase!" His head throbbed badly. Shortly after the Nergal managed to break contact with the invaders, Geist had set up a makeshift distilery in the ship's cafeteria and opened the bar. The fast cooked gin he made had been a real experience to drink, but it had gotten the job done. Daishi wondered who had brought him back to his room. Daishi got out of the bed. He needed some coffee and two really big painkillers right now. For the briefest instant, he had a horrible feeling, but a quick look around confirmed he was in HIS room, and he was alone. That warented a sigh of relief. He had never gotten as drunk before as he had last night, and he wasn't sure what he might do when under the influence of that much home made gin. He stumbled out of his room, nealy crashing into Kevin as he walked past. "I'm sorry, sir," he mumbled. "Had a bit much to drink last night, right?" Kevin asked. Daishi nodded. "I had a lot on my mind that I wanted to forget." "Did it help?" Some images from Daishi's dream flashed through his mind. "For a while, I guess. All it really did was give me a monster hangover." Kevin nodded. "Tea's one of the best things for hangovers," he said, holding up the teapot he carried. "Care to join me in some?" Daishi shrugged. "Why not?" ***** The cafeteria was pretty much deserted. On the veiwscreen on the far wall, Geist's Get to Know the Nergal program was playing. "So you see," Ruri was saying, "relativistic effects actually work to our advantage in this case. The effective mass of the ripion particles increases dramatically as the drive accellerates them to a significant percentage of the speed of light, and as a consequence the amount of kinetic energy they impart to the ship is likewise increased dramatically. This acts as a force multiplier, allowing a great deal of speed for an extremely small expenditure of fuel. Also, because ripions are a plentiful byproduct of the quantum phase transition engine that powers the munchion cannon, we have a near limitless fuel supply." "Do you understand any of this?" Daishi asked Kevin. Kevin shrugged. "Not a bit of it. I thought this show was supposed to be for little kids." Daishi sipped at his tea. Something about it didn't seem quite right. "How is it?" Kevin asked. "It's fine, but..." "Well," Kevin said, "there might be a bit of my special ingredients in that particular batch of tea." Daishi grinned. "Both the military and the VEEC might frown on that," he said, then took another drink. Aku entered the cafeteria. It didn't take her long to locate Daishi in the virtually empty room. "There you are, Robert," she said. "I've been looking all over for you." "If you'd looked where I was," Daishi said, maybe a little more casually than normal thanks to the tea, "you would have found me." Aku was apparently unnerved by Daishi's apparent sense of well being, as though thrown off by it, but she pressed on. "So much has been going on, so much death. I was wondering if you could help me unwind. We both need to relax," she said in a rather spicy voice. All the signals were there, as blatant as though they were spelled out in twelve meter high flaming letters, but Daishi just couldn't feel uneasy about anything right now. "Sure," he said. Aku smiled and grabbed his hand, leading him out of the cafeteria. Daishi thought he heard Kevin sigh, but he didn't let it concern him. ***** "Ancient philosophers of science feared the idea of a quantum phase transition," Geist was saying now, standing before the camera and wearing a beanie. He decided that most of his cast members would likely kill him in his sleep if he decided not to make an appearance in his own series while they were compelled to participate. Besides, there was something about an old man wearing a beanie and talking about quantum mechanics that just fit with the rest of this insanity. "They generally believed that such an event would ultimately result in the destruction of the entire universe. However, the fifth universal force, stasis, first theorized by Gaussian scientists a hundred years ago, prevents such disasters. This knowledge was important for harnessing a valuable new source of near limitless cheap energy, not to mention providing the Nergal with all of its power needs with a system that takes up a tenth of the space of a conventional fusion plant." His lines done, Geist walked off camera while Tina and Argon did the closing scene. Ruri turned towards him. "Incidentally," she said, "who came up with the idea of using ripions for propulsion or quantum phase transitions for power? Was it you?" "What do you mean?" Geist asked. "Mr. Tycho said that the technology the Nergal uses was derived from the alien transmitter on this planet. But it wouldn't make any sense for a simple communications system to have all this technology just attached to it, so I assume you studied the transmitter and came up with new uses for the technology it had." "That isn't exactly accurate," Geist said. "The fact is that we didn't develop any of this technology. We just found it all and copied it." "You found it all?" Ruri repeated. "What does this mean? Is there more of this alien technology somewhere?" Geist was about to answer, but was interupted. "Bravo, Bravo!" Tycho said a bit more loudly than would normally be called for. "What a magificent program, what a wonderful idea." He cast a sideways glance at Argon. "You were just brillant." Argon self consciously removed his bunny ears. "Well, umm, actually..." "However," Tycho continued, "I'm going to have to ask you to stop now. We need to ration our power." This seemed to be a contradiction to Ruri. Because of her direct connection to the ship's computer, she knew the power situation better than anyone, and there would be no harm to continue filming. Then again, it got her out of this idiotic show, at least for a while. She said nothing. She looked around for Geist, interested in continuing their conversation, but he was nowhere to be seen. It occurred to her that the grown-ups, Tycho in particular, were hiding something from her and most likely the rest of the crew. For a moment she considered complaining, then decided there was no point. They weren't likely to listen to the precocious twelve year old who had a hunch. ***** "So what is this place?" Daishi asked Aku as he looked around the room she had brought him to. The room seemed rather featurless and dark to him. "It's a holographic virtual reality simulator," Aku replied. "It's supposed to combine holoprojections with direct stimulation of the brain to produce a virtual world designed to help the crew relax." She smiled coyly. "We can do... anything... in here." That should have been enough to set off every warning bell in Daishi's head, but he was still operating under the influence of Kevin's tea. He still didn't catch it. "Sounds like fun," he said. Aku giggled like a schoolgirl as she handed Daishi a VR headset. Unlike the holoprojectors in some... other... stories, the simulator could not create a solid object. A few generic props scattered around the room were used to simulate numerous virtual objects, and the headset helped by stimulating the brain directly with a sort of controlled hallucination. The user perceived what he was supposed to to fit the setting. It was almost as good as the real thing. Or, in Aku's opinion, better, because it could be manipulated. "I think a Coruscant private school might be fun," she said, "it will be interesting to see what it would have been like to have gone to high school together." She put her headset on her head, an action aped by Daishi. "Whoa!" Daishi said as the VR headset switched on. An incredible swirl of colors flashed through his vision as the headset tuned to his brain. After a minute the swirl halted, and Daishi found himself in a classroom. The cloths he had been wearing were gone, replaced by a black school uniform. "So, how do I look?" he heard Aku ask. He turned around to see Aku wearing a uniform of her own. It was, of course, distinctly different from Daishi's. The plain black buttoned long sleeved shirt and slacks of his uniform were replaced on Aku by a black blouse, the top held closed by a yellow ribbon tied into a bow, and a skirt that was, well... "Where's the rest of it?" Daishi asked. The skirt barely cleared the mid thigh on Aku, leaving only bare legs the rest of the way. Pretty nice legs at that, but still... "Yeah, they do seem to make the skirts pretty short," she said with a self conscious voice that Daishi was beginning to think might be less than honest. He wondered if the tea was wearing off. "So what are we supposed to do here?" Daishi asked. "It's role-playing, silly," Aku replied. "You're my student advisor for... after school activities." Daishi caught the implications of that short pause. The tea was definitely wearing off. Aku moved over to the classroom door and locked it. Daishi wondered if this was just part of the play-acting, or if she actually had locked the actual door. "Why did you do that?" he asked. "I know you're entering the school art competition next week," Aku said, ignoring the question. Daishi blinked for a second, then shrugged. This was all make believe anyway. He could swallow that. "I was kind of hoping," Aku continued, "that you would consider using me for your subject..." She turned away, shyly fingering the ribbon on her blouse. Daishi hadn't taken too much art in high school, but he had a disturbing feeling he knew what she meant. A feeling confirmed when the ribbon drifted to the floor. Aku began slowly unbuttoning her blouse as she turned towards him. And when she looked at Daishi expectantly, for the briefest instant he saw Tina's face. Daishi tore the headset off, snapping himself back to reality. He had to get out of here. Aku watched him stumble out of the room, almost wanting to sob as he fled from her. Instead she just decided that she would have to be even more resolved. Robert would be hers! ***** "To Admiral Thrawn," Kevin said, holding up a martini glass. "To Admiral Garrett," Geist added, holding up his own glass. "To Admiral Daala," Generec En Pee See One added. She always was one to add the great females of imperial history. "To Atrus," Stormie suggested. "To Emperor Palpatine," Argon tossed in. "What did he do that was so good?" Geist asked. "He made a very satisfying boom when he died." Argon said The others looked at each other, then nodded. "To Palpatine!" They raised their glasses in salute, then downed them. Daishi entered the cafeteria, and was amazed at the changes that had been wrought on it since he was last here not more than half an hour ago. A piano sat at one end of the room, complete with a ninja playing it (they were easy to train for such tasks if they were caught young). A neon sign now flashed the word drinks over the now far less makeshift bar where a fair amount of the bridge crew seemed to be gathered. Just in case, Daishi checked his head to make sure that the headset really was gone and he wasn't still in the simulation. When he found no headset, he shrugged and headed for the bar. Kevin was just leaving as he arrived, pausing briefly when he saw Daishi, but continuing on. Stormie was talking with Geist when he got to the bar. The helmsman was once again a helmsman, and judging by the water dripping from him, the change was fairly recent. Geist was behind the bar. Appropriate since he was the bartender and all. "So Aku tells me you can change into some kind of monster," Stormie was saying. "Yeah," Geist said. "It's your fault, too." He turned to Daishi. "Whatcha have, Dai?" "Some scotch, a slugthrower, and three bullets?" Daishi asked. "Nah, just some scotch." "What do you mean it's my fault?" Stormie asked. "After you got me caught up in trying to find a cure for you," Geist said, "I figured the best place to start was at the springs. Got knocked into one while I was there, too. Some kind of damned cursed spring of drowned panda." He slid a glass of... umm... scotch down the bar to Daishi. "You know," Generec En Pee See One pointed out to Stormie, "you are really starting to creep people out with that changing into a girl thing." "It creeps me out too," Stormie said. Daishi took a drink of his scotch. The experience was not quite what he expected. "Smooth, eh?" Geist said with a smile. "Yeah," Daishi managed between coughs. "Kinda wierd though. Tastes just a little different." "Well that's because it isn't really scotch," Argon pointed out. "The Nergal is supposed to be a dry ship, so there isn't a whole lot of traditional alchohol aboard. We have to improvise with what we can." "What is it?" Daishi asked, kinda dreading what answer he'd get. "Oh," Geist said, "some gin with cola added for color, iodine for flavor, and a touch of hair tonic for age. A few other ingredients too, just to give it that extra something." "Is it safe to drink?" Daishi asked. "I'm pretty sure," Geist said. "Okay." Daishi downed the rest. "Give me another." Geist chuckled as he poured Daishi another drink. "You know, I'm kinda surprised to see you on this ship, considering..." The holographic floating disembodied head of Tina appeared over the bar, interupting Geist. "So there you all are," she said. "I'm afraid I need all of you on the bridge for a very important briefing. Sorry." The face vanished. Geist sighed. "Looks like happy hour is over, boys and girls. Let's get moving." The crowd at the bar quickly dispersed, but Daishi wanted to know what Geist was going to say. "What did you mean when you said you were surprised to see me here?" Geist looked puzzled. "Because of Kevin," he said, as though that explained everything. "What do you mean?" Daishi asked. "You mean you don't know?" ***** Almost the entire senior staff was on the bridge, even Geist was present in his capacity as the ship's resident all knowing bartender. Despite this, Tina saw no trace of Daishi. In fact, she hadn't seen him at all since yesterday. She couldn't help but wonder if he was avoiding her. "Our sensors have confirmed the ship's identity," Ruri said. "But how can this be?" Tina asked. The wreck of a modified frigate lay on the snow covered ground about a kilometer from the Nergal. "The Crokus was pulled into hyperspace at Erebria, and we destroyed the ship that sucked up the Crokus and the Pansy. It just doesn't make sense." "Sure it does," Geist said. "The enemy does have ships that function as dimensional gates. It is likely that such craft could pull ships like the Crokus out of hyperspace as easily as they push them into it." "But this means that there could be an enemy gate nearby," Narm pointed out. "We could be in grave danger here." "Nevertheless," Tina said, "I think we should prepare a boarding party." "I don't know if we have time for that, captain," Tycho said. "Besides, this is a dangerous situation. We have no idea where the enemy gate ship is now." "But there may still be survivors out there," Tina said, then turned to Kevin. "Right admiral?" "Let's wait on this right now," the admiral suggested. "Hold on!" a new voice demanded. Daishi stalked into the room. "I have some questions for you, admiral." "You're late, Daishi," Argon said. "I assume you have a good reason." Daishi ignored Argon, focused on Kevin. "Tell me, Admiral," he said with fire in his eyes, "is it true that you led the fleet during the first battle of Varneck?" "Oh," Tycho interrupted nervously, "you can listen to old war stories later, can't you?" "What are you talking about?" Tina asked. "Everybody knows the Admiral was in command during the battle. You did know that, didn't you?" "No," Daishi said, the bitterness evident in his voice. "Tycho never told me that our leader was the... hero... that caused a dreadnought to crash on my home." He lunged, delivering a fist into Kevin's gut. "YOU MURDERER! YOU KILLED THEM ALL, DAMN YOU!" Kevin fell to the deck with Daishi on top of him. Kevin was offering no resistance, but Daishi was too far gone to notice. He just kept raining blows on his one time commander. Suddenly Daishi was struck in the back of the head, and lapsed into unconciousness. ***** "I don't care what the circumstances were!" Narm said. "It is unforgivable for a member of this crew to assault the Admiral! Tina... I mean captain, you have to punish him." Daishi was firmly fastened to a chair and gagged at one end of the bridge. Tina looked down sadly. "I know, Narm," she said, "but what kind of punishment would be appropriate?" She cracked an innocent smile. "I'll think it over, okay?" "Well we can worry about that later, captain," Tycho said. "In the meantime, let's all look at this." He punched up a new image on the holodisplay. "This is our destination. A research facility at Varneck's north pole. With luck, we may be able to fine a spare quantum pulse engine there." Tina turned to Kevin. "Admiral?" "Let's send the hatavs ahead to scout it out," Kevin said, briefly glancing at Daishi. ***** "Jeeze, I can't believe how slow this hatav is!" Generec En Pee See One said as her machine slowly transited the icecap. "Well, you're the one who wanted to load it with so much weaponry," Three pointed out. Her and Two were fifty meters ahead of One's hatav. Tina had been willing to release Daishi so that he could accompany them, but Narm and Tycho had been opposed to the idea, so nothing had come of it. "Man," Three said to herself, "this snow is abominable." She thought for a second. "Abominable snow-man." She began to chuckle. "So just where is this place anyway?" One asked. "Well," Two said, "I've been checking all the charts, but I can't find it listed anywhere." "Wait a minute!" Three suddenly exclaimed. "This isn't right!" "You mean it's to the left, Three?" Two asked. "You said it so seriously that I though... AHGG!" Two's hatav slipped on a piece of slick ice and fell. "Three," One said, "do you see anything?" "Only subjectively," Three replied. "If it's not where we can see it, then that means..." An invader attack unit suddenly burst out of the ice, slamming into Three's hatav, knocking it to the ice, and interrupting her explanation. The fast machine leapt away, heading for One's machine. "One, it's heading your way!" One tried to get out of the way, but her machine was just too slow. The invader pinned her hatav to the ground. "This sucks!" she complained, "I can't even dodge in this piece of junk! WHA?" The invader extended a drill attached to its left arm and began tunneling into the cockpit. "No way!" One said, "No freaking way! Two! Three!" The cockpit canopy began to crack as the drill continued to eat away at it. "DAISHI, PLEASE!" The drill was suddenly ripped away as Two shoulder rammed the invader off One's machine. The invader unit flipped over several times as it bounced along the ice, but ultimately landed on its feet. Which would have helped it if all three hatav pilots hadn't imediately hit it with every weapon at their disposal. The invader and a good fifteen cubic yards of the icecap ceased to be. One let out a sigh of relief. "Thanks guys," she said. "But who's name did you just yell?" Three asked mischievously. Two chuckled. "Yes, I heard it too Three." One turned bright red. "Hey, wait, you guys just misunderstood! I just forgot he was here, that's all!" "Daishi!" the other two pilots hollered in unison. One growled. "All right, name your price you blackmailers." "Banana pudding for a month!" Two declared. "And there's this cute little tea set I've been admiring," Three tossed in. ***** The command staff of the Nergal got the hatav team's scouting report soon after they returned to the ship. "There are five gate ships surrounding the installation," Argon was saying. "This doesn't look good," Narm pointed out. "Yes," Tycho said, "but it is the duty of all VEEC personnel to retake that facility at any cost. That's section twenty two of your contract." "Why not just order us into an obvious trap?" One asked. "What's so important about that place?" "I'd rather not subject the lives of my crew to danger so recklessly," Tina said. "The Nergal is in no shape to fight right now." "We'll use the other ship," Kevin suddenly said. "What ship?" everyone else asked. "The Crokus." ***** "I really don't think you should do this sir," Argon was saying to Kevin in the hangar bay. "It's too dangerous, let me go instead." "No," Kevin said. "I'm afraid you don't have the proper training. Besides, all we're really doing right now is making a survey." "If that's the case," Daishi asked bitterly, "then why are you making me come along?" "Consider it your punishment." "I think you can count on that, Admiral," Geist said as he got his cold weather gear on. The fastest way to get to the Crokus was by hatav. Daishi's machine covered the distance fairly quickly, and also provided an easy way to force entry. The trio found a dead ship. Crushed bodies everywhere, each long encased in ice. "These people did not freeze to death," Geist pointed out. "What does this mean?" Kevin asked. "It appears that the gate ships inflict some sort of strain when they are used to jump a ship that kills biological organisms." Geist shrugged. "Of course, considering the other things I see around me, It seems obvious that something beyond our understanding is at work with these gate ships. The Crokus was sucked into hyperspace a week ago, but this ship has been frozen in the ice at least that long, while even with the most advanced hyperdrive in the galaxy, the Nergal takes four days to get here." "Are you saying the gate ships can transport matter through space instantaneously?" Kevin asked. "No," Geist said. "I said the Crokus was frozen in ice for at least a week. I wouldn't be surprised if it turns out the ship has actually been here much longer than that." "But that would mean..." Kevin began to say. "LOOK OUT!" Daishi yelled as he tackled Kevin. Where the admiral once stood, a small invader attack unit dropped to the floor. Its semi-frozen frame turning sluggishly as it searched for its prey. Daishi brought up his blaster and pulled the trigger, but nothing happened. The gun was malfunctioning. The invader turned towards him and got ready to leap... Only to be shot down by three well placed blaster shots from Kevin's blaster pistol. "Why did you bother saving me?" Kevin asked. "I don't deserve your protection." "I acted before I could think," Daishi said. "That's why." They got to the bridge without further incident. Kevin immediately began punching commands into the main control system, revealing that aside from the entire crew being dead, the ship was still in good working order. "There you are!" Kevin said so softly that only Geist noticed. "What was that, Admiral?" Kevin turned to the other two. "The propulsion nozzles appear to be clogged with ice. Someone will have to clean them out." "You mean me?" Daishi said icily. "Yes, but you will need Geist's help to do it properly." Geist shrugged noncommittally. "Might as well." ***** "That's odd," Geist said a few minutes later, standing in the open hand of Daishi's hatav and looking down a propulsion nozzle, "the nozzles appear to be clear enough to..." "Get back you two," Kevin suddenly warned them over the comm, "the ship is taking off!" The ground began to tremble as repulsorlifts slowly lifted the Crokus into the air. ***** "The Crokus as successfully lifted off, captain," Ruri reported. "The admiral really did it!" Tina exclaimed. "The Crokus's fire control system has gone active," Ruri said, "It is targeting us." "What?" Kevin's image appeared on the comm. "Greetings, captain. As you can see I have armed my guns and aimed them at the Nergal's hull." "Umm," Tycho managed weakly, "the enemy is the other way, Admiral." "Change your course!" A new course plot appeared on the screen. "New contact," Ruri reported. "Evaluated as an invader gateship. The gateship lies directly along the path the Admiral has provided us." "You want us to enter the gateship?" Argon said with surprise. "Are you mad, sir?" "Please, admiral," Narm pleaded. "The Nergal won't fare any better in the gateship than the Crokus did!" "Are you saying the Admiral wants to kill us all?" Aku asked. "It just doesn't make any sense," Stormie said. "OH YES IT DOES!" Daishi suddenly shouted over the comm system. "He's trying to cover his mistakes! Can't you see that's why he's trying to get rid of all the evidence?" "If that were true, Daishi," Geist said, "you're the first one he'd kill." Explosions began appearing all around the Nergal. "Multiple new contacts," Ruri reported. "Invader warships closing from all angles." "Oh, great," Narm said, "as if we didn't have enough troubles." "So we can either fight the Crokus and the invaders," Argon summarized, "or plunge into the gateship." "Between the two," Stormie said, "I'll take the gateship." "What?" Tycho exclaimed. "Do you know how much this ship cost? We can't just throw it away down some wormhole!" Tina finally spoke up. "Ruri, pull back and recover Daishi's hatav!" she ordered. "Stormie, plot out the entry vector for that gateship, on the double!" "Captain," Tycho began to say, "It specifically says in your contract that in this situation we have to stand and fight. Now if you maneuver to a new location, you can destroy the Crokus and..." Tina cut him off. "Don't you have any faith in the judgment of the admiral that you selected?" ***** "DAMNIT TINA!" Daishi yelled as he opened the cockpit of his hatav, leapt out, and started running for the bridge. Behind him he could hear Aniston shouting something, but he ignored him. He didn't have time to worry about properly racking his machine. "Don't do it Tina!" he shouted as he kept running. "What the hell are you thinking about!" ***** "The Crokus is following close behind us captain," Ruri reported. Daishi burst onto the bridge. "What the hell are you thinking, Tina?" he demanded. "Didn't you hear us say that everyone on the Crokus was dead? Do you want us to end up the same way?" Geist's holographic head suddenly popped up. "That may not happen. We have the compression field to protect us." "Steady as you go," Tina ordered. "Maintaining a stable field is our highest priority." "Tina!" Daishi yelled. "Don't you understand yet?" Tina asked. "The admiral did all of this just to give us a chance to escape Varneck." "That can't be!" Daishi protested, "This isn't making any sense!" "We are now entering the gateship," Ruri reported. "Are you sure about this captain?" Stormie asked. "I've got a bad feeling about this." "The Crokus has turned around and is now blocking the entrance to the gateship," Ruri said tonelessly. "There's no way he can fight in that thing!" Argon declared. "What is he doing?" Tina demanded fearfully. "If the Crokus were to self destruct," Ruri speculated, "the invaders would be unable to get to the Nergal." Daishi growled. "Why are you all trying to make this sound so honorable?" "Admiral!" Tina called over the comm, "Don't do it! The Nergal still needs you to guide us with your strength and wisdom! There's so much I don't know yet! So much you still need to teach me!" Kevin's face once again appeared. "No, I'm afraid there's really nothing left for me to show you. I believe this course is the best way to protect the ones I care about, and to make amends." The visual broke up for a second, but Kevin continued speaking. "I may not have been much of an admiral. I'm probably no better a man. Here I am forcing others to comply with my wishes, but let me just tell you this. The Nergal is your ship. It belongs to you. All the anger, the hatred, all of the passion, all that you feel is yours, and can never be taken awa..." the signal was lost. "ADMIRAL!" Tina cried. "TURN BACK!" Argon demanded of Stormie. "I can't!" Stormie said desperately, "It's as if some invisible force is pulling us in!" "The gateship's opening has been destroyed," Ruri reported. "Umm," Narm said as the Nergal continued on into the unknown. "Does anyone know where we're going?" ***** "You know," Daishi said later at the bar to nobody in particular, "there's an episode of Immortal Warrior that's just like this. One of the heroes dies protecting the others, it seems so cool. I never though that it could happen to me." He slammed his scotch glass down angrily. "Why did we have to be saved by a lowlife murderer like him? He only did it because he had run out of options. It wasn't courage." "On the contrary," Geist said, impassively tending the bar. "Doing what you have to do, especially when you have no other choice, is precisely what courage is." "Hey, Daishi," the Deathwookiee said, dropping a note addressed to Daishi on the bar. "Found this in the teapot Kevin borrowed. He wrote this before your little incident on the bridge. Turns out that he never intended to leave this planet alive." Daishi angrily batted the note aside. "And what does that mean?" he demanded. "Should I just forgive him? How can one life pay for all of those who were slaughtered because of him?" The Deathwookiee shrugged as though he really didn't care (and most likely he didn't). "Since when has death ever been fair?" ***** In the corridor outside the bar and eatery, three women stood their own sort of vigil. "Do you really think he came all this way just to kill himself?" Aku asked. Generec En Pee See One shrugged. "Doing something stupid to make up for something else you've done is pretty idiotic anyway," she said, not really sure why she was standing here with these two women. “At some point you have to accept responsibility.” "I know," Tina said, "but who's going to guide us from now on? I relied on his years of experience. I don't know if I can do this on my own." ***** Far away another man contemplated the events that had led the Nergal to this point. The Baron Administrator of the Vast Empire Engineering Corporation heard his secretary entering his office. "You look as lovely as usual," he said. The secretary seemed uninterested in small talk. "The Nergal has left Varneck, sir," she said. "But they have suffered severe losses." "Hmmm," the Baron Administrator mused. "I suppose that is pretty much as we expected. It's time to move on to plan B." The secretary nodded. "Maybe I should board the Nergal as well," she said. The Baron Administrator contacted his receptionist. "Get me the VE high council," he said. "Tell them its time we kiss and make up." TO BE CONTINUED! Next Episode: The Lukewarm Cold Equation (or not)
 
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"Some day we'll all look back on this and cringe."
~Uncle Yo-sim, All Knowing Bartender

Tina...bunny suit? hmmm...in section three of the contract it states that Tina must always wear the bunny suit... DON'T YOU GUYS EVER READ THE CONTRACT?!?
 
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Corporal Tycho Celchu, Slicer
Dread Knights, Vast Empire's Stormtrooper Corps
Union Representative of the Dread Knights
[email protected]
AIM: Tycho987
ICQ: 110585444