I have been doing a work up on an NPC for my own personal use in stories. However, if I were to submit him, I would like to use him still, not so much in Squad stories, mind you, but more for personal stories. Plus, he has such a strong backstory with my PC, I often mention him in stories. Would all these rights remain?

No, as mentioned in #13 you would lose all those rights. So if you choose to participate then by submitting an NPC you essentially hand it over to me. As I also mentioned in #14 it is possible to still use that NPC however you see fit or later as part of some of my own stories, be them official or not. It is also possible for that NPC not to be what I'm looking for and if that's the case you'll be able to continue using it however you see fit as if you always had. So you see, various possibilities do exist - alas they would greatly depend on the NPC itself, and that would mean me having to see it first, and that would mean it being submitted, and that would mean you first waving your rights as far as it is concerned. Might sound risky but the benefits should outweigh the risks...

Glad to hear it Serpent.

Your attention, gentlebeings. I need to make one modification to Deep's requirements as listed in the first post:

13. Once you submit an application as part of this competition you lose all rights you may have on that NPC. So the bad news is that you'll no longer be able to freely use it in your own stories. Those submitting NPCs to the competition must be willing to allow others to write those NPCs without need to request permission. Primary rights to the NPC remain with its creator (meaning their permission IS needed to kill it off, maim it, totally reverse its personality, or make large changes to its backstory, etc). The good news is that you might see it used in other stories instead... possibly as part of a larger and more ambitious project *hint, hint*

14. Exceptions to the above point, be them temporary or permanent, can be arranged only after discussing them with yours truly. This is especially true so long as the NPC is really well written and you are and will continue to be active. (Struck because it bases off the portions of 13 that were struck.)

Having conferred, the NHC notes that no individual member may require another member to give up rights to any character, be they NPC or Main.

Deep: Thanks for creating this competition. I love activity, and this helps increase it. However, these changes are required for it to be a canon part of the Navy. If you wish to run the competition unmodified, it'll have to move to the StoryNet and won't be canon.

-Drac

This sounds completely debased and disgustingly like bribery.





I approve.

/me parts with some more creds conveniently lying about

I liked the story and especially the NPC concept. Think I might end up using this one as well at some point in the future. Would be rather easy and quite natural as well...

Four personal observations - not intended as actual criticism or anything similar:

1. 3 meters is rather tall for a Twi'lek considering they are a Humanoid species, one that according to Wookieepedia typically measures 1.6 - 2.4m. Not saying it's impossible (a mutant maybe? ) but being that tall would likely cause a whole lot of problems - if nothing else most structures are built to accommodate normal Humanoid specimens.

2. Xizor's ship was named "Virago".

3. Billionaires would be filthy rich individuals - so rich in fact that they would likely not need plans for a starfighter when they could buy entire Star Destroyers, mini fleets or just take over some big manufacturer and make it build stuff instead. Then there's also the fact that most if not all billionaires are rather paranoid when it comes to their safety and well being. As such it's hard to believe someone that loaded would not use ultra advanced personal shields, have a legion of bodyguards on standby or simply not use intermediaries to deal with the less than legal / moral decisions.

4. Falleen are a cold blooded race, one that greatly values discipline and self control and tends to think first rather than following their instincts. Exceptions, like the one portrayed are obviously possible of course... I just felt the need to emphasize that they'd be one of those few races where such exceptions would likely be fewer in number when compared to Humans for example.

Here's mysecond entry. http://comnet.imperialnetwork.com/topic/15995/page/0/
Hope it's simply ENJOYED this time (to be honest I'd pick it apart too). The plot may seem a little... lost, but it all comes together in the end.

Well then, I'm on to make another. I'll edit this message when I'm done. Even though my genius plan, err...

/me commences coughing

I mean my, offer left me without further credits, erm...

/me coughs some more

... Without further Blue stuff, I offer this glass of more alcoholic  Red stuff. More comes upon my completion!

/me hands Deep the nearly overflowing glass

Ok, I've finished. Here it is http://comnet.imperialnetwork.com/topic/16002/page/0/

A round of Blue stuff and Red stuff on me! As much as Deep wants!

/me begins to hand bartender creds, as Deep begins to order booze.

I rather like your NPC ideas... and the booze

My suggestion to you though, not necessarily in this competition, but in general - try and pay more attention to details. For instance 800m long ship with 150m3 apartments would mean 5-25 apartments total (and the latter is if the ship is more of a giant square block for the most part, in which case it'd be closer to a space station anyway). It's thus more than unlikely for the equivalent of several skyscrapers, restaurants, shops and all sorts of attractions to function only for the benefit of a handful of individuals.

But as I started out - I do like the overall results

Congrats to Serpent and Eli.  I, too, enjoyed reading all the entries! 

Hell, 10 mil creds is enough to satisfy me. Thanks for this competition Deep. I hope my NPCs are of some help to you. As you kind of mentioned, I wrote about NPCs with jobs that would be useful to you. I would have done a salvager but Serpent already had written a good one.

The better writer definitely won, and Serp's was better in the actual CD part of it, as well as the character concept itself. I certainly enjoyed it. So I guess I know now what I need to work on.