Ryn
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Hello All
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November 26, 2011
4:54:15 PM
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Hey I'm new, so what's my next step? 
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Slasher
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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
5:05:05 PM
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Welcome Crewman Ryn, I am Commander Rorran 'Slasher' Gorma, the Chief of Naval Training, and thus, your taskmaster for the first portion of your training. The first section of your training will be to create a biography for your character, in order to do so you'll need to click on this link, and then follow the directions, posting the completed Biography on this topic. Link: http://www.vastempire.com/wiki/Character_DevelopmentIf you need any assistance, feel free to post here, or PM any of the following members: Trykon Ellesmere Slasher -Commander Slasher CNT
CNT/CDR Rorran "Slasher" Gorma/PLT Cappadocious/VENA/VEN/VE TFXO:B|SCAP/CDR Rorran "Slasher" Gorma/ICF II Fearless/TF:B/1st FLT/VEN/VE [IC1][SoV][CBV.][MC:1][SoL][GWC][NS-3][LSM][=*IM*=][=*SWC*=](=*A*=)(=*SA*=)(=^ME^=)
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Ryn
ComNet n00b

[VE-NAVY] Crewman (CRW)
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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
5:22:38 PM
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Kathryn "Ryn" Stark Physical Appearance - Homeworld: Sedri
- Age: 20
- Species: Human
- Native Language: Galactic Basic, knows curse words in several languages.
- Gender: Female
- Skin Color: Caucasian
- Height: 5 foot 4 inches
- Weight: 130 lbs
- Hair Color: dark blonde
- Facial Hair: none
- Eye Color: blue/hazel
- Scars: none yet
- Tattoos: none that she remembers
Physical Description Ryn is short, or at least as far as she's concerned. She is the youngest and shortest member of her family branding her a 'runt'. She is muscular, not for a love of weight lifting, but more because her parents would have preferred that she be more demure and feminine. Her hair tends to be unruly even when she makes attempts at pulling it back in a ponytail or if someone forces a braid upon her. Things like makeup and beauty products are completely foreign to her and unwanted complications in her daily routine. Personality - Ryn loves droids and tends to keep at least one with her as a "pet" of sorts at all times.
- She is a natural when it comes to piloting, having little training, but she also has a hot temper and will rush into things when frustrated.
- Ryn keeps to herself, a trait gained after her several other attempts to get out of her parents shadow, she will be guarded about her past and untrusting of new people.
- Ryn likes to drink and gamble, basically anything that would anger her parents brings her joy but she has been known to go to excess in both arenas when kept unchecked.
Character’s BackgroundKathryn is the youngest daughter of Willem and Maisie Stark from Sedri. She is the youngest sister of Rickon, Anisa, Grant, and Nyck. Her family were considered nobles of the capitol city of Braavoski, and although many attempts were made for name to be a proper lady she never took to the notion. She does not need to marry to gain influence and power, she knows she can forge her own way. When Kathryn, or Ryn as everyone calls her, reached the age of 20 she had exhausted all the schooling she could bare and attempted several jobs. She enjoyed most of the jobs, especially six months she spent as an apprentice starcraft mechanic at a local shipyard, but the moment someone in her family would find out it would be reported to her parents who immediately interfered and the next day she would be fired or 'let go' as they liked to gently put it. Ryn would be chastised for doing work 'beneath her station' and sent back to some kind of boring training for being a noble lady. She realized that her only hope was to leave, get away from the prying eyes of her family before they married her off to the first rich family they could find. She had no desire to be someone's wife. The opportunity came when a friend of hers from the shipyard, returned from leave to visit. He had joined the Vast Empire Navy and told her about the opportunities she could indulge in there. Ryn struggled with the decision for several days, then after a particularly nagging dinner with her family she gathered her savings and one bag of personal items and headed for the city transport service. ID Line: TRN/CRW Ryn/[Flight Designation]/S:137 "Raptor"/W:46 "Shield"/PLF Cappadocious/TF:[Task Force acronym]/[Fleet #]Flt/SC/VEN/VE (wasn't sure about the Flight Designation, Task Force, or Fleet#. Looked like things that needed to be assigned to me, but let me know if I read incorrectly)
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Ryn
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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
6:08:56 PM
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Here's the wiki: http://www.vastempire.com/wiki/RynAnd a better ID line: TRN/CRW Ryn/[Flight Designation]/S:137 "Raptor"/W:46 "Shield"/PLF Cappadocious/TF:A/3Flt/SC/VEN/VE
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Slasher
ComNet Marshal

[VE-NAVY] Commander (CDR)
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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
6:42:18 PM
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Good so far Ryn, on to the next section, post on Raptor: Overwhelming Odds. As a side note, be careful how closely you model your character after one from an Author's copyrighted work, while we are a fan fiction site, we do not endorse using anothers work. So just be careful how close you refer to another work. However, a very good Bio, onward Crewman!
-Slasher
CNT
CNT/CDR Rorran "Slasher" Gorma/PLT Cappadocious/VENA/VEN/VE TFXO:B|SCAP/CDR Rorran "Slasher" Gorma/ICF II Fearless/TF:B/1st FLT/VEN/VE [IC1][SoV][CBV.][MC:1][SoL][GWC][NS-3][LSM][=*IM*=][=*SWC*=](=*A*=)(=*SA*=)(=^ME^=)
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Ryn
ComNet n00b

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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
6:46:01 PM
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i don't know what author I'm modeling something after, I guess that's a win for subconscious suggestion haha. But okay, are you sure I don't need to change something before I go posting?
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Trykon
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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
7:02:43 PM
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The last name of Stark, a brother Rickon, and the town name of Braavoski are all names which George R. R. Martin uses in his A Song of Ice and Fire series of novels, which starts with A Game of Thrones. Given that you've used all of these, it isn't an outrageous stretch to imagine your character's personality is based at least in part on Arya Stark, a character in those books with a similar aversion to "ladylike" activities. I frankly do not believe that you "subconsciously" chose so many names and characteristics used in those books when writing your bio. To be clear: we're writing fan fiction here, and nothing you've submitted is outright plagiarism. You aren't "in trouble." But we do ask that you please take care with how much "inspiration" you draw from other authors' works as you move forward. You're a competent writer, and we want to read YOUR work, more than we want to read copied or recombined material.  Carry on, Crewman. -WO1 Trykon, Executive Officer of the Naval Academy
SCAP /WO1 Wyl Trykon/CR90 Defiance/TF:B /1Flt /FC /VEN /VE XNT /WO1 Wyl "Trick" Trykon /PLF Cappadocious/VENA /VEN /VE [SoA][SoV][BWC][NSM][E][NAR][DSM][SWC]/(=*AE* =)(=*SAE* =)(=*TG* =)(=*SCFE* =)TRN/JRN Trykon/DJO/VEDJ
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Ryn
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[VE-NAVY] Crewman (CRW)
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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
7:24:01 PM
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I've watched the show, but Stark came up on a random name gen (www.seventhsanctum.com). Yea I like the name Rickon and using Stark probably made me think of that name, but didn't really connect it. And I had to actually google Braavoski, its Braavosi style fighting she uses? (Knew someone with the last name Brivoski, polish, thought changing the spelling was an homage lol) Funny never knew she was a mechanic or that her father was still alive, she's more bad ass than I remember
but no worries, here's the updated bio, allow me some time to fix the wiki as I am working on a post.
Kathryn "Ryn" Kerdi
Physical Appearance
Homeworld: Sedri
Age: 20
Species: Human
Native Language: Galactic Basic, knows curse words in several languages.
Gender: Female
Skin Color: Caucasian
Height: 5 foot 4 inches
Weight: 130 lbs
Hair Color: dark blonde
Facial Hair: none
Eye Color: blue/hazel
Scars: none yet
Tattoos: none that she remembers
Physical Description
Ryn is short, or at least as far as she's concerned. She is the youngest and shortest member of her family branding her a 'runt'. She is muscular, not for a love of weight lifting, but more because her parents would have preferred that she be more demure and feminine. Her hair tends to be unruly even when she makes attempts at pulling it back in a ponytail or if someone forces a braid upon her. Things like makeup and beauty products are completely foreign to her and unwanted complications in her daily routine.
Personality
Ryn loves droids and tends to keep at least one with her as a "pet" of sorts at all times.
She is a natural when it comes to piloting, having little training, but she also has a hot temper and will rush into things when frustrated.
Ryn keeps to herself, a trait gained after her several other attempts to get out of her parents shadow, she will be guarded about her past and untrusting of new people.
Ryn likes to drink and gamble, basically anything that would anger her parents brings her joy but she has been known to go to excess in both arenas when kept unchecked.
Character’s Background
Kathryn is the youngest daughter of Willem and Maisie Kerdi from Sedri. She is the youngest sister of Raou, Anisa, Grant, and Nyck. Her family were considered nobles of the capitol city of Elicast, and although many attempts were made for name to be a proper lady she never took to the notion. She does not need to marry to gain influence and power, she knows she can make her own way in the galaxy.
When Kathryn, or Ryn as everyone calls her, reached the age of 20 she had exhausted all the schooling she could bare and attempted several jobs. She enjoyed most of the jobs, especially six months she spent as an apprentice starcraft mechanic at a local shipyard, but the moment someone in her family would find out it would be reported to her parents who immediately interfered and the next day she would be fired or 'let go' as they liked to gently put it. Ryn would be chastised for doing work 'beneath her station' and sent back to some kind of boring training for being a noble lady.
She realized that her only hope was to leave, get away from the prying eyes of her family before they married her off to the first rich family they could find. She had no desire to be someone's wife. The opportunity came when a friend of hers from the shipyard, returned from leave to visit. He had joined the Vast Empire Navy and told her about the opportunities she could indulge in there. Ryn struggled with the decision for several days, then after a particularly nagging dinner with her family she gathered her savings and one bag of personal items and headed for the city transport service.
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Ryn
ComNet n00b

[VE-NAVY] Crewman (CRW)
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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
7:27:17 PM
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http://www.vastempire.com/wiki/Rynoh well decided to fix the wiki lol. Hopefully there are no further misunderstandings, I apologize for what looked like plagiarism to you. Please let me know in the future if anything I do offends in future.
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Trykon
ComNet Marshal

[VE-DJO] Journeyman [VE-NAVY] Warrant Officer 1st Class (WO1)
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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
7:44:44 PM
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It wasn't offending; it was only just significant enough to warrant a warning as you move forward. As I said: Quote:nothing you've submitted is outright plagiarism. You aren't "in trouble."
Carry on, Crewman.  -Trick
SCAP /WO1 Wyl Trykon/CR90 Defiance/TF:B /1Flt /FC /VEN /VE XNT /WO1 Wyl "Trick" Trykon /PLF Cappadocious/VENA /VEN /VE [SoA][SoV][BWC][NSM][E][NAR][DSM][SWC]/(=*AE* =)(=*SAE* =)(=*TG* =)(=*SCFE* =)TRN/JRN Trykon/DJO/VEDJ
[This message has been edited by
Trick
(edited November 26, 2011
7:45:18 PM)]
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Atrasin
ComNet Marshal

[VE-NAVY] Commodore (COMD)
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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
8:44:17 PM
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had you been 'in trouble' you would've been sent to my office where i would have made you listen to my entire collection of Mel Torme and Wayne Newton albums.
CNO|COMD Atrasin|ISD Iron Duke|TF:A|1Flt|VEN|VE [=A=][=^SA^=][=^ME^=][=*MA*=][=FOCE=][=*TG*=][=*Eng*=][=*BO*=][MC1]{BWC}[NSR:1]{SAS}{SWC}(SOL)[LSM][VC:B][DSM][VC:S] Vacuus Ordo, Nex -Without Order, Death All a man can betray is his conscience. - Joseph Conrad We few, we happy few. We band of brothers. - Henry V May God have mercy upon my enemies, because I won't. - General George S. Patton Jr.
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Ryn
ComNet n00b

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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
9:07:24 PM
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That sounds utterly horrifying. I shall try to stay on your good side sir.
TRN/CRW Ryn/[Flight Designation]/S:137 "Raptor"/W:46 "Shield"/PLF Cappadocious/TF:A/3Flt/SC/VEN/VE
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Ryn
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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
10:44:41 PM
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TRN/CRW Ryn/[Flight Designation]/S:137 "Raptor"/W:46 "Shield"/PLF Cappadocious/TF:A/3Flt/SC/VEN/VE
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Ellesmere
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RE: Hello All
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November 26, 2011
10:56:38 PM
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From what I can see your post looks good, excellent post length as well as good quality work which is always nice to see. Great post overall, Crewman!
XO/PO2 Ellesmere/CR-90 Defiance /TF:B/1FL/FC/VEN/VE [MC2][MC1] SCO/PO2 Ellesmere/TF:B/Raptor/VENA/VEN/VE [MC2][MC1]
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Slasher
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RE: Hello All
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November 27, 2011
8:02:22 AM
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With the Chief Trainer's endorsement of your post, you are passed for that section, you are now in the 'proving grounds' this is a 2 week period in which we expect trainees to keep a good level of postings on other topics and also possibly create their own stories. I will have a story up soon which you will be welcome to join in, details will be PM'd to you on Monday or Tuesday, during your proving period, report to myself, Trykon and Ellesmere on both Fridays, good luck, and most importantly have fun.
-Slash
CNT/CDR Rorran "Slasher" Gorma/PLT Cappadocious/VENA/VEN/VE TFXO:B|SCAP/CDR Rorran "Slasher" Gorma/ICF II Fearless/TF:B/1st FLT/VEN/VE [IC1][SoV][CBV.][MC:1][SoL][GWC][NS-3][LSM][=*IM*=][=*SWC*=](=*A*=)(=*SA*=)(=^ME^=)
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Ryn
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RE: Hello All
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November 27, 2011
9:18:22 AM
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Okay great, thank you 
TRN/CRW Ryn/[Flight Designation]/S:137 "Raptor"/W:46 "Shield"/PLF Cappadocious/TF:A/3Flt/SC/VEN/VE
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Trykon
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RE: Hello All
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November 27, 2011
9:43:25 AM
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Congratulations, Ryn, and welcome to the VEN!
-Trick
SCAP /WO1 Wyl Trykon/CR90 Defiance/TF:B /1Flt /FC /VEN /VE XNT /WO1 Wyl "Trick" Trykon /PLF Cappadocious/VENA /VEN /VE [SoA][SoV][BWC][NSM][E][NAR][DSM][SWC]/(=*AE* =)(=*SAE* =)(=*TG* =)(=*SCFE* =)TRN/JRN Trykon/DJO/VEDJ
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Ryn
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RE: Hello All
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November 27, 2011
9:59:16 AM
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TRN/CRW Ryn/A-2/S:137 "Raptor"/W:46 "Shield"/PLF Cappadocious/TF:A/3Flt/SC/VEN/VE
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Atrasin
ComNet Marshal

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RE: Hello All
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November 27, 2011
4:25:14 PM
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please tell us your middle name isn't 'Tintin'
CNO|COMD Atrasin|ISD Iron Duke|TF:A|1Flt|VEN|VE [=A=][=^SA^=][=^ME^=][=*MA*=][=FOCE=][=*TG*=][=*Eng*=][=*BO*=][MC1]{BWC}[NSR:1]{SAS}{SWC}(SOL)[LSM][VC:B][DSM][VC:S] Vacuus Ordo, Nex -Without Order, Death All a man can betray is his conscience. - Joseph Conrad We few, we happy few. We band of brothers. - Henry V May God have mercy upon my enemies, because I won't. - General George S. Patton Jr.
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