Physical Appearance
Homeworld: Coruscant
Age: 18
Species: Human
Native Language: Galactic Basic
Gender: Male
Skin Color: White
Height: 1.735 Meters
Weight: 72.5 Kilograms
Hair Color: Black
Facial Hair: None
Eye Color: Hazel
Scars: One on face.
Tattoos: None

Physical Description
Finbar's most notable physical feature is his height. He is only 1.735 meters which makes him short when compared to the average person. He stands up with a good posture, and his uniform fits him well. However he isn't fat, he is quite narrow. He has short black hair and hazel eyes. If you examine him well you'll find that he has a prostetic left hand. You probably wont notice it because he keeps a glove over it. In his personal time he still enjoys wearing his non-TIE Fighter uniform. Finbar is agile and quick. He can climb well, and he has remarkable balance.

Emotional Description
Finbar will be nice to you if you are nice to him. He is quiet with new people, but if he knows you, he will be quite...loud. He doesn't try to be mean or cokcy, but just neutral. He tries to remember to be on his toes in every situation, and this makes him very perceptive. He doesn't want to talk about his past. He only worries about the future or the present. Finbar is also optimistic and persistent.

Character’s Background

Finbar was born in Coruscant. His father was a Stormtrooper, and his mother was a naval officer. Finbar grew up in military bases most of which were on Coruscant, but a couple of times he had to move to different planets. He didn't see his parents much, so he had to rely on himself when he was alone. Fortunately he did exceptionally well in school, and he was praised for his smarts.

When Finbar was 16 his father was killed by rebels. He was devastated. For awhile he could barely function in the outside world. Then the worst happened. His mother was killed when her cruiser was destroyed. Finbar vowed to do whatever he could to destroy the rebellion. He bought an apartment in Coruscant, and started to work at a patent office. He couldn't join the Navy yet, so he wanted to save up money. One day when he was coming home from work, a speeder T-boned his. His speeder lost control and rammed into a sky scraper. He cut his face, and lost his left hand. The crash left him with a large scar that crosses his left eye and goes down to his lips. This crash makes him remember that you always have to be on your toes.

Finbar then joined the Imperial Navy when he was 18. He hoped he would soon be flying his own Star Destroyer, but first he had to climb through the ranks...

Welcome to the Vast Empire Naval Academy, Crewman Finbar.

My name is Senior Chief Petty Officer Wyl Trykon, and I'll be your Training Officer (TO) while you go through the Academy's Orientation program.  I'll be around to help get you acclimated to life in the Vast Empire (a process we call, "Basic Training"), the most important part of which is learning how to role-play as an Imperial starfighter pilot in an ongoing, collaboratively-written story (a set of skills which is taught in something we call, "Flight School").  I'm glad to hear you have some experience role-playing in the Star Wars Galaxy, and I approve of your enthusiasm, but Maroy's point is valid: consistent effort over time is the way to achieve your VE goals.

With your first post here on the Naval Academy board, you've started that process, by completing Imperial Initiation (well done), and you are hereby clear to begin Flight School, which will prepare you for daily life as a pilot in a VE squadron.

Your next step should be to visit the VE Wiki page for Flight School, found here, and begin working on Chapter 1: Character Development by clicking the appropriate link.  When you finish the assignment, post your work here (your bio is a fine start, but I need to see an understanding of the ID line system, too), so I can review it, and we'll proceed from there.  Please note: here in the VE, we write stories in the third person, past tense; you should too.

If you need further guidance, please send a Private Message with your questions to "Trykon" here on the ComNet, or go to the Naval Academy channel on IRC, which is #VENA, and make an inquiry of any staff member.  Good luck with your training, Crewman, and again, welcome to the Vast Empire.

Sincerely,

SCPO Wyl Trykon, your TO

Useful Links:
  •  The Vast Empire Naval Academy wiki page
  •  The wiki page for Basic Training
  •  Flight School: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3
  •  How-to-create-a-wiki-page Tutorial
  •  Java-based IRC chat

I also read chapter 2 and 3.

http://www.vastempire.com/wiki/Finbar_Bandoran

Here is my wiki page. I still am not sure what my squad is, so I most put "NA"s.

Nice work so far, Finbar.  Just FYI, your unit while you go through the Academy is Raptor Squadron, but that will change once you graduate and are placed in one of the active duty squadrons.  You're hereby cleared to move on to Chapter 2, but make sure to add one of the character information charts to the beginning of your wiki page as soon as you get a chance (look at other members' pages to see an example): it provides critical information at a glance for other members who visit your page.  As the Rear Admiral said, keep it up!

-SCPO Trykon

I'm really busy with baseball, homework, and school, but I should get that post up by tonight.

It's very difficult to change it, but it's possible. Let me know what you want and I'll see what I can do

Welcome to the Navy, Finbar. Good to have you with us.

-Drac
Chief of Naval Warfare

I would prefer "Echelon" as a callsign.

I have my post up now. To me it sort of sounds like a runon, but it's a good start.

So is it possible for my callsign to be "Echelon".

Ok, Crewman.  Good first effort on the Raptor post, but I have a few suggestions for your future writings:

1.  This one was a bit simplistic.  Try to incorporate some more specific aerial combat maneuvers into your battle posts: barrel rolls, loops, break turns, etc.  The more specific you get, the better your reader will be able to follow the action, and the more exciting it'll be.  I did appreciate your instinct to include a reference to a part of your character's background, but even that moment could have been more fleshed-out.  How does your character feel about his past?  Try to show us more of what's going on - emotionally, in the character's inner world, and physically, in the 3-Dimensional realm of dogfighting.

2.  Try not to become a Mary Sue (a character who's just naturally great at everything).  Everybody wants to be extraordinary, but few people actually are.  And nobody really starts out that way.  It's fine to be a good pilot (we like good pilots), but give some indication of how you got to be that good - from where are those skills coming?  If this is your first flight in a TIE, is it likely you'd become an ace, even a simulated ace?  There are ways to have fun as a writer/role-player, and help out your squad-mates in-story, without resorting to giving your character inexplicable, implausible skills.

3.  As mentioned above in the thread, future story posts should be put up all at once, not a little bit at a time.

With all of that said, I think you're ready to move on to Chapter 3, Crewman!  Just keep these points in mind as you move forward; they're intended to help, not discourage you.  For the next phase of training, post your report here in this thread, and PM it to me, and then we'll get you placed in an active-duty squadron!

As Drac said, it'll be up to StOrMz to see about changing your Member Name.  I'll send him a PM about it, but for now, focus on your training, and make sure your wiki page lists your callsign.  Keep up the good work, Echelon.

-Trick

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_Sue

Surprised you'd not heard of the term.

Oh, and Finbar: do update your wiki page with a table at the beginning, like you see on other Navy members' pages.  Need to see you can do that before I pass you through Basic.

If you want to post again to the Raptor: Overwhelming Odds story, maybe incorporating some of those points, feel free (any activity is rewarded), but no more story posts are necessary for training.  Just update your wiki page, and make a report like it says in Chapter Three of training.  Post that report here, and PM it to me, and you should be set for active duty.  The "On-Line Roster" can be found in the left sidebar on the VE main page.

I made the table on my wiki.

So what is my rank now?