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Topic:  Xylonia Rose - A5 - Close Combat
WhiskeyRose
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  Xylonia Rose - A5 - Close Combat
January 30, 2012 5:13:26 PM    View the profile of WhiskeyRose 
Sergeant Major Ronson’s scowl may have intimidated some of the other students, but Xy was not phased by it. At least today is the last day. Thank the Maker. Xy smirked as she flash backed momentarily to her first day as Ronson’s pupil.

“Alright maggots! Before we get started, anyone want to show me why they think they do NOT need to be here?” Ronson barked at the wet ears from the academy that were standing at attention before him.

Before he finished his sentence, Xylonia took a step forward, glaring at the gruff old sergeant.

“Ah, Private Rose. Alright, give me your best shot. Hit me if you can.” He was clearly annoyed by her cockiness, but he was a patient man. He stood still as stone and waited.

Xylonia smirked and lunged at him, ducking low and landing on her feet in front of him, she instantly sprang again to uppercut him in the jaw. Ronson merely took one step aside and her small fist whooshed against empty air. A grunt escaped her lips as she dropped into a crouch and shot her leg out as she spun to sweep him off his feet. He reached down while yawning, grabbed her ankle, and lifted her into the air. He looked down into her grey eyes and barked at her, “You done foolin’ around pup?”

Xylonia growled in anger and tried to kick him with her free leg. Ronson simply dropped her on her head and kicked her in the ribs. The rest of the class laughed at her openly. She rolled to her side, cradling her head and side, moaning in pain.

“Get up Private! Now!” Ronson yelled, veins in his neck throbbing with his anger. “And the rest of you lot! Get down and give me twenty! You don’t laugh in this class!”

Everyone groaned and jumped down and started doing twenty push-ups.

Xylonia pushed herself to her feet, spitting out a mouthful of blood from biting her tongue in the fall.

“You too Private Rose. Fifty, now for being cocky!” Ronson glared at her.

Reluctantly, she dropped and did fifty push-ups and bit her tongue to keep from giving the Sergeant Major lip. From that day forward her peers in Ronson’s class highly disliked her.

It had been a grueling past couple of weeks. Xylonia wore her bruises and cuts like medals though. She had been cocky. Ronson’s punishments on the entire class and the beatings she had to suffer through behind closed doors from the other students didn’t make Xy weaker, it made her stronger mentally and physically. She thought she knew it all when it came down to a fight. Ronson had taught her otherwise. And although she was rebellious, she took to Ronson’s training like a fish to water. Every night after class, Xy continued to practice on her own, and wrangled a sparring partner when she could. The pain still echoed in her knuckles from her persistence. A soft smile spread on her amber lips.

Ronson’s barking brought her back to the present. “Just what are you smiling at Rose? Guess you’re up first! Get your smart ass over here!”

Xylonia blinked and focused on the present. Ronson stood before her, waiting patiently and slightly smirking at her. Oh blast it all. He’s been looking forward to this. Hope I can at least hold my own against him this time. I’ll show you Ronson, you’re efforts were not wasted! Taking control of her mind and emotions, Xylonia’s smile evaporated and her face became neutral. Her breaths came out controlled and even.

Springing like a jack rabbit, she ran around the edge of the sparring ring. Ronson followed her with his eyes. Abruptly she changed her path and went straight at him, but the quick change and her fast speed tripped her. Using the momentum, she rolled towards Ronson and threw a clenched fist at his knee cap. He kicked her fist and while he was putting all his weight on one leg, Xy threw her legs up and wrapped them around his stationary leg, her ankles locking just above his hip bone. His kick hurt like hell, her fist screaming with fire. She used that fury and swung her hips, bringing Ronson to the ground with her. Tangled on the sparring mat, Ronson brought his fake blaster up and pointed it at her head. Just as soon as he had it aimed at her, she grabbed the end of the blaster, pushing it aside while ducking. Ronson punched her in ribs and tried to pry her off his leg. A grunt escaped her lips from the impact of the blow. I can’t give up! I’ve come so far! Grabbing his pinky that rested on the blaster, she bent it backward and pried the prop from his stone grip. Holding the blaster by the nozzle, she whirled her arm around and tried to hit his temple with it. His brick like fist smashed into the side of her face, and his other fist began pounding her side. She shuddered in pain and missed. Unable to withstand much more of his heavy hits, Xy relented his leg and rolled way from him, throwing the blaster prop away as she did so. Ronson and Xy both stood, watching each other.

"Is that all you got Rose? You're weak." He scoffed at her.

Her blood boiled and she let out a roar of anger. She ran at him, reaching for his throat.

"Tsk tsk. I can see right through you." He held his arms the way she knew he would, ready to punch her once she was within range.

She jumped at the last second, flipping over him, and planted her foot in the middle of his back. Pushing off of him she tucked into a somersault and landed right where she wanted. Her ivory hand lashed out grabbing a nearby salt shaker, one of the many props scattered around. Throwing it at his head, she sprang to her feet then used her feet to kick the nearby mop up into her hands. Ronson had to duck to avoid the salt shaker. That split moment gave her the advantage she needed and she ran at him with as much speed as she could pump from her legs. He crouched, waiting for her to assault him with the stick. Right before she was upon him, she used the mop to pole vault over him. As she landed behind him she wrapped both arms around his head, ready to snap his neck. The mop clattered against the hard mat and the room was silent. Ronson held still as stone and grunted.

"I yield. Well done Rose. I knew you had it in you." He turned to her after she released him, and he shook her taped up hand.
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Havock
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  RE: Xylonia Rose - A5 - Close Combat
January 30, 2012 5:59:31 PM    View the profile of Havock 
Not gonna grade this yet, but I will tell you there is an issue with the details in the training. To attempt to illustrate, I'd like you to compare the training you describe in your post to this:






Or even more realistically, this:





Notice how little the trainer interacts with the troopers, he supervises, and they repeat moves several times. You are probably only learned one or two moves a session then in the end you move on. Sparing would be done at the very end, but probably between two recruits and only going through the moves with the trainer supervising to show you know the moves, no actual injury to your fellow trooper Just look through the videos and see what you come up with.
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WhiskeyRose
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  RE: Xylonia Rose - A5 - Close Combat
January 30, 2012 7:22:29 PM    View the profile of WhiskeyRose 
I will do a new post later tonight.
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  RE: Xylonia Rose - A5 - Close Combat
February 3, 2012 8:50:32 AM    View the profile of Raziel 
In the British army some of the lads I know did take quite a bit of punishment in the close combat course. Which had little training before they got chucked into lots of sparring sessions.

There isn't much somersaulting or flying kicks going on though and whilst you'd be shown how to down people with improvised weapons quickly, we couldn't really pistol whip all our recruits.
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WhiskeyRose
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  RE: Xylonia Rose - A5 - Close Combat
March 13, 2012 5:13:25 PM    View the profile of WhiskeyRose 
Determination was evident on Xy’s face as she watched Sergeant Ronson. It was her second time taking his close combat class. The first go around, her mind had altered reality and she had not learned a damn thing. Her alternate reality had actually made her relive the abuse she suffered at a younger age. At the end of her first course Ronson slapped her lightly upside the back of the head after she had started doing gymnastics around the sparring ring instead of practicing disarming her fellow student opponent. Her blurry eyes blinked in confusion as Ronson chewed her a new rancor hole and told her to get the hell out of his class room. Laughter followed her from the other pupils as she left shamefully.

Luckily for her, Ronson was willing to let her take the class again. It was drawing close to the end of the first day, which was all instruction. Xy was completely immersed in Ronson’s instruction, which was not what she expected. He demonstrated paralyzing moves on a dummy and disarming moves with volunteers from the class. With eyebrows furrowed in concentration, Xy kept her wits about her and tried to memorize Ronson’s every move and guidance.

"Alright, go sleep on what you have learned and be ready to start trying the moves yourself tomorrow. You might want to bring some ice packs, you will get bruised! Class dismissed!" Ronson called out in his scratchy deep authority filled voice.

Xy saluted the Sergeant respectfully and filed out of the room with the others. She went straight to her apartment to get to bed early. She wanted to be fully rested for the next day.

At the crack of dawn, Xy and the other students were standing at attention in the sparring room that Ronson had been using as a class room.

"Good morning maggots!" Ronson bellowed with a slight grin.

"Good morning Sergeant!" everyone else yelled back in unison.

"Today things get fun. Grab a sparring partner and hit the mats. There are dummy weapons on my desk for you to use practice disarming. Feel free to come up and grab them when you want to use them, but please return them when you are done so that others can use them! I want to see you sweating and practicing the techniques I taught you yesterday. Carry on!" Ronson rested his hands behind his back as he watched the troopers pair out on the mats.

Xy nodded respectfully to her opponent and they started to dance. She moved her feet slowly as she held a defensive position. The skinny lumbering man was grinning at her. Humph. He must think this is going to be easy. Wrong. He threw a kick at her ribs and she threw her right arm down, blocking the blow with her forearm. Stetson nodded approvingly to her. He started to speak, but she closed the distance between them and threw a left handed punch at his torso.

Blocking her blow, he spoke in a relaxed tone, "Nice one, but I’m going easy on you, for now."

"Come now Stetson, lay it on me. I can handle it." Xy goaded him.

Suddenly he grabbed her arm and twisted it behind her, standing at her back. She could hear the satisfaction in his breathing and so with a focused look on her face, she busted out one of Ronson’s moves. Turning slightly to her left, she bent at the waist, throwing her left hip into Stetson’s abdomen. Simultaneously she grabbed his arm with her free hand and pulled him up over her shoulder, gripping onto his wrist tightly. The momentum and her pulling threw him over her hip and onto his back on the mat with a loud smack. Her arm burned from the angle he had twisted it in and from his tight grip. Grunting in frustration, he swung his leg behind her knee, sweeping her off her feet. Xy rolled away to avoid his grapple. They both stood, facing each other once more.

Ronson walked around the room, giving tips and commenting on several of the sparring matches. He came to Xy and Stetson just as they both stood back up.

"Lance Corporal Rose, next time he tries to sweep you, try jumping to avoid it. It’s frelling difficult to do, but possible. Keep going." He nodded and walked away to guide others.

Stetson threw some punches at Xy. She blocked two of the three throws, but one got through and stung her shoulder. Yeah, that one’s definitely going to be a bruise. She countered with her own punches. Hitting him in the ribs and arms, Stetson stepped backward.

"Ow! Ow! Ow! Slow down!" he whined.

"There’s no slowing down Stetson! Man up and defend yourself!" Ronson called out.

Stetson blushed, embarrassed the Sergeant had heard him. Anger took over his face and he came at Xy again, this time he didn’t seem to be holding back. The black haired young buck threw a side knee and Xy blocked it with her own knee. He became even more angry. Crouching trying to get around her to take her down, Stetson ran at her. She turned sideways at the last instant, grabbing one of his wrists in the process and throwing the palm of her hand into his spine. Pushing his torso forward, using his momentum to her advantage and pulling his arm back, she pinned him against the nearby wall.

"Son of a frelling sith!" Stetson muttered through mushed lips.

"You like the taste of wall Stetson?" Xy couldn’t help her snide remark.

He grumbled something inaudible.

"I’ll go grab us some fake weapons to practice disarming techniques." She stated quite exuberantly.

She released him and turned, walking towards Ronson’s desk. When her back was to Stetson, he lashed out at her, still fuming. Grabbing her pony tail, he yanked her back and slammed her back against the wall, knocking the wind from her. Punching her in the chest, Xy gasped in pain before she could start blocking the rest of his blows. Where he had hit her stung and she gritted her teeth before emitting a low feral growl. She bent forward and pushed against the wall, ramming her left shoulder into Stetson’s gut. He doubled over in pain and she continued to propel forward, taking him to the mat. Locking her legs around his knees, she started punching his stomach right under the sternum repeatedly. He tried to grab her shoulders to throw her off, but she swung her arms up in front of her, throwing his hands off of her. Diving down and throwing her forearm across his neck, she came nose to nose with him. Struggling for breath, his face started to turn red.

"Attack me with my back turned again, and you’ll wish you were dead you piece of hutt scum!" Xy spat in his face before releasing him and rising. She jogged over to Ronson’s desk and grabbed a dummy rubber blaster.

Xy faced Stetson once again, pointing the blaster at him. He just stared at her for a moment before he decided to try to disarm her. She held the blaster pistol with two hands. Ducking, he reached up over his head and grabbed the blaster by the nose and threw it out of her hands. Xy nodded at him, acknowledging his successful disarm. Stetson picked up the rubber prop and aimed it at Xy to give her an opportunity to try to disarm him. After a breath, she darted forward and slightly to the side throwing a punch hard into Stetson’s elbow of the arm holding the rubber gun. Groaning in pain his arm started to fall down to his side. Trying to raise the weapon again at Xy, he started turning to his left to face her. Immediately, Xy dove behind him and threw her leg into the back of his knees, sending him crashing forward onto the mat. Once he was down, she punched his wrist, making him drop the prop. Stetson, shook his hand, slightly wincing.

"Nice one Xylonia." Ronson beamed at her knowing she had definitely shown improvement.

Smiling at the Sergeant, Xy returned the dummy blaster to his desk. "Oh, I’m just getting warmed up Serg’." She gracefully grabbed the rubber commando knife and headed back over to Stetson who was watching her warily now.

Planting her feet on the mat, Xy held the knife up and waited for Stetson’s move. Stetson took a defensive stance and the two started to move around in a circle, keeping each other at a distance. The green rubber blade went forward towards Stetson. He jumped out of the way and then grabbed her wrist of the hand that was holding the fake weapon. Keeping the rubber a safe distance away from him, Stetson used his other hand to bend one of her fingers backward, making Xy drop the chunk of rubber. He grinned defiantly at her before she jumped on him and wrestled him to the ground. Placing her hands upon his neck, she grinned back at him.

"Stetson! Disarm and immobilize your foe! You left yourself open to attack." Ronson stated as he walked between the spar partners and another set of students.

Xy removed herself from the skinny and tall young man letting him get up. Picking up the knife, he took a similar stance Xy had when she was wielding the dummy weapon. Xy also stood and went after Stetson without pause. He swung the rubber at her neck and Xy threw an uppercut punch under the but end of the knife and Stetson’s hand. The rubber model went flying up into the air and Xy caught it by the handle with a flourish before kneeing him in the ribs and punching fiercely and repeatedly with her free hand. He stumbled backward caught off guard by the fast and furious assault. Pressing his back against the wall, he panted for air. Xy grabbed his wrist, twisted it backwards making him turn to try and avoid the pain. He fell to his knees and she twisted the arm behind his back while stomping on his other wrist that now rested on the mat. Immobilized, he struggled against her trying to get free. Cool hard rubber slid along his Adam’s apple and he sighed loudly.

"Gotcha’." Xy whispered triumphantly before releasing him.

Slowly he got to his feet and held out his hand for the dummy weapon. "Yeah. You sure did. Here, I’ll put it back."

Xy handed him the rubber knife by the handle and wiped sweat from her brow with the back of her forearm. The other students were hitting and blocking each other filling the room with grunts and pants. Loud smacking sounds also filled the room as the students took each other down to the mats. The sparring continued into the next day and by the end of it, Ronson was nodding happily to Xylonia.

"Well done. I must say, I did enjoy watching you take down all the opponents you faced. You have improved immensely. Keep up the hard work Rose." Ronson shook her hand firmly before she left the class smiling despite all the bruises.
OOC:
WC: 1875
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Garryll Gates
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  RE: Xylonia Rose - A5 - Close Combat
March 15, 2012 6:05:31 PM    View the profile of Garryll Gates 
There are a few problems with the spec; however, these problems aren't problems with the content of the post. The problems rest in problems concerning flow and things that passages that don't make a tremendous amount of sense.

You have the class observing only a single day of demonstrations, which seems inadequate for the sudden 'mad skills' Xy and her opponent seem to be demonstrating later in the post.


OOC:
Ronson called out in his scratchy deep authority filled voice.

Scratchy doesn't seem to make sense in this context; the wording here suggests some decrepit old man shouting out orders to his grandkids, not a drill sergeant belting out orders to soldiers.

OOC:
Xy nodded respectfully to her opponent and they started to dance. She moved her feet slowly as she held a defensive position. The skinny lumbering man was grinning at her.

'Skinny' and 'lumbering' seem to be at odds with one another; one suggests a large, plodding weight, whilst the other suggests the exact opposite.

I was rather confused who this 'Stetson' fellow was until I realized it was the sparring partner. Try identifying NPCs earlier.

Finally, it seems rather odd that Stetson seems rather calm, then flips out, then is calm once again. The sudden switch of character seems schizophrenic and not normal in the slightest.

I've decided to Pass this spec. You may add [A5] to your ID line.

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WhiskeyRose
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  RE: Xylonia Rose - A5 - Close Combat
March 15, 2012 7:52:11 PM    View the profile of WhiskeyRose 
Thank you for pointing out the flaws Garryll.  After you pointed those out, I agree with you.  I will try to improve myself off of this.  Thank you for passing me!  Perhaps I will use this post in Skarr's Rewrite challenge.
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