jebluap, welcome to the Vast Empire Navy!

I am Warrant Officer 1st Class Amacuse, but please... call me Cayden.

An Academy trainer should be here shortly, so... just sit back, look at past trainees threads to get an idea of what to expect, and... think carefully on which path you choose: Starfighter Corps or Junior Bridge Officer Corps?  The choice is your's...

-WO1 Cayden "Amacuse" Tavers

this stuff is kind of heavy (lot of info), but- i think i got your copy and paste job done. 

http://www.vastempire.com/wiki/Jebluap

capitol ships, i thought.  i can do that, right?

jebluap is accepted into the Capital Ship Service Training Program, roster has been updated.

Okay- I'm not sure preciselly where you want me to go with what I've given you.  I think you want me to flesh out more information, but at this point, info like, specifics about parents and family, my homeworld, etc- i kind of want to leave blank.  That way i can make them up at my convenience, y'know.  if i try to make up the whole world right now, i might draw myself into a box.  here's a sample i sent to amacuse for a little review, though- i think it might flesh my writing style out for you a bit:

---

"You ganna let him down?" Two tables and a bar full of whiskey away, two men stood.  One was off the ground, looking a little less comfortable than the other, but the man holding him up had a scowl on his face.  Annoyed at the tone of the question, he turned his head to the loan accuser.

"Wasn't planning on, dude." At the bar, one man tried not to roll his eyes.

"How about you let him go?"  He opened the flap of his jacket, the glint of a weapon catching the aggressor's eye.  The two men engaged in the corner looked eachother in the eye.

The one held against a wall, a short guy, almost a kid, looked like he wasn't going to count his sabacc cards just yet.  The larger man, holding him there, looked like he'd just gotten off of work.  His clothes were dirty, and he looked like he'd been sweating the entire day.  He leaned in close to the shorter man and whispered something before dropping him to the ground.

"Honey, let's go," he said as he grabbed his coat from a chair.  A young girl, probably his daughter, didn't say anything and got up to leave with him.  As they exited, the man with the gun folded his hands together and puffed on a cigarette.

The man at the bar spun slowly on his stool to catch the table man's gaze.

Taking a sip of his drink, the man at the bar said, as coolly as he could- "you know what that guy was angry about, right?"

"No," the man at the table said," but it doesn't really matter."

Jay, the man at the bar, nodded and replied- "fair enough." He gathered his jacket as well and stood to leave.

"Wait," the man at the table said.  The bar was mostly empty. The man who had been pinned against the wall had slipped out without anyone noticing.  "I guess I just walked in.  Why was he so angry?"

...

"The guy pinned against the wall was an Imperial."

"So what?"

"Coming into a bar like this, where most folks have lost someone because of a raid...  not smart.  If you interfere- it's just getting involved where you don't belong.  I doubt he would have hurt him.  Just wanted to scare him."  Jay walked out of the bar.

----

Jay rubbed his eyes.  It was late already, but he wasn't ready to sleep.  The chrono-clock on the wall said he should go to bed, but he returned to his work.  There were a hundred things he could worry about, but he chose not too.  So far as he was concerned, God would take care of that.  One day at time, he tried to remind himself...

On his desk was a large data pad, various documents opened; mostly research.  In the box to his right were a number of small canisters.  Years ago, before his tumultuous life as a drifter began, Jay had aspired to be a renowned doctor.  He imagined what they would say about him.  "Charismatic, smart- brilliant." But before he could start his steady but inspiring climb to the top, he heard whispers of something.  It changed him.

All the advanced technology that had been discovered on his home planet; the expensive equipment, the synthetic compounds...  All of it.  Unnecessary.  He hadn't seen it himself, but he'd heard whispers.  An international plague that had been gripping the galaxy for some years, one of the worst diseases of the era...  Curable.  For some reason, though all the information at any academy of medicine would say different, that it was a mutant disease that maybe had no cure...  Jay believed that it was possible.  Of course, what he learned was ironically simple, as all truths seemed to be.  Rest, nutrition...  Purity in materials.  And so far as the medicines- pure compounds.  Drawn from nature.  Bark extracts, oils from plants and their fruit...  Captured and super concentrated.  Taken internally, aromatically, externally...  Selling people on the idea that there was a cure for something that had claimed the lives of billions, if not trillions of people, in the face of a professional world of galactic medical synthesists...  Almost irresponsible.  Unless it was true.

Jay's wandering had led him on a circuitous path though.  Finding these "cures," wasn't as straight forward as it sounded. A lot of folks claimed to have cures, as he found, but they were constantly being smeared as frauds.  It was difficult to tell what worked and what didn't.  But slowly, Jay was feeling like he had a better and better understanding of what was happening....

But money was tight.  His family had been believers in his intelligence through his early schooling, but since he'd been in and out of universities over the last several years...  They were beginning to wonder if he had a future.  Now he lived alone, bills up to his eye-balls...  The economy was terrible.  Job after job seemed to take him further from ever reaching his dream of buying the materials necessary for developing cures...  They weren't terribly expensive, but debt came first...

Deep down, even though he trusted his God, Jay was a bit anxious.  At one time, his ideological beliefs had forbade the idea of joining the Imperials...  Even now, as Jay thought about the exchange in the bar, he thought of his hypocrisy.  But, he wondered...  If he could just use the imperials to help him with his education and to pay his bills...  Then he might be able to stay for a brief while, develop some skills, and start a real life.  One that didn't aid the oppressors of his planet, but liberated people from otherwise terrible losses...

Jay picked up one of the canisters in the box.  Unwinding the metallic lid, an aroma filled the room.  It was exquisite.  The plant was nija nija, a foreign plant that he'd had special ordered to the metro-nursery.  Jay had been studying extraction methods, and it had taken him months to put together the money to buy some of the simple equipment.  But even with his limited funds, he had extracted enough of the special oils, and then compressed them, to form the concentrated liquid in the canister.  The aroma lifted his spirits...

Tomorrow, though, he knew he would make a decision that he'd once thought unconscionable...  He would join the Imperial Navy.

Well, Crewman "J," your approach to the exercise has the distinction of having never been tried before... 

My name is WO1 Wyl Trykon, and I'll be taking over your training from here on in.

Your post for Chapter 2 of Command School was competently written, and I appreciated your exploration of the political spectrum possible within a post-Imperial faction like the VE, but I have a few concerns:
1) IC, punching an officer during your evaluation would likely end your career in the Navy.  Consider a rewrite using another plot device to end your exercise, or be prepared to write the follow-up post, explaining what happens next (I want to make sure you can write responsibly, including an ending).
2) OOC, the kind of anger-possession you describe - as if the emotions of the dead were somehow being channeled - comes too close to a violation of the "no-Force" rule for my taste.  Even if you just meant it to be a colorful description of an emotionally volatile moment, I'd prefer you make it explicit that nothing supernatural is going on, to avoid violating the proscription on Force use by non-DJO members.
3) I was a little confused, after reading your post, why you character is interested in joining the VE.  He seems pretty anti-Imperial...what about the VE is appealing to him?  This MUST be made more clear before you move on.

Hopefully that gives you a sense of what to work on moving forward.  I need your bio to specify why he's joining the VE (and he can be conflicted if you like, but make the terms of his inner turmoil as clear as possible, to help your fellow writers write about "your" character), I need you to revise your Command School story post or post again to the thread with what happens next, and I need you to then move on to the third and final Chapter of Command School.    Don't be discouraged, though: you're doing a wonderful job.  These are meant as constructive criticisms and challenges. 

-WO1 Trykon

i don't mean to defy you, obviously, lol- just kind of wonderin if you'll hear me out.  i think i'm a pretty decent writer, so i can do more of this as we go, but, like i said- i'm hesitant to try and write more.  i don't like "forcing" my writing.

I love a good pun. 

I think you're misunderstanding me, though, J (and don't worry, I don't think you're "defying" me, hehe).  You have to add a mention of his inner conflict to your Bio/wiki page, not to your story post.  And your story post either needs to be rewritten to not include the punching incident, or I'm asking for another story post which describes what happens afterwards, before you're good to graduate the Academy.  So, I'm not asking for "every inch of background," nor for you to "force" writing anything... just saying, a mention of the conflict in the bio will be helpful for your fellow members, so include it, and at your leisure, show me a conclusion to your training story arc. 

-Trick

Thanks, J.  I appreciate your willingness to work with me on this; just wanted to see how you continued after an event as "striking" as the one you depicted in your first post.  You've cleared Chapter 2.  As for Chapter 3, go ahead and send a sample report - saying what you did this past week, in essence - to me on via the ComNet in a Private Message.  Also, post a copy of that sample report here in your training thread for reference.  Once that's complete (and the wiki update), you'll have proven you know the basics of being active duty around here, and you should be bridge-bound in no time. 

i still can't edit my wiki for some reason?

ah, right on- thanks man

And with that, you've satisfied the requirements for Command School.  Well done.  Give me a moment, and I'll get you placed on a ship... I'll post again to this thread to let you know the next step.

Hello, Jebluap. I'm Vice Captain Drac, the commander of 2nd Fleet. Good to have you with us.

You've been assigned as the Junior Bridge Officer aboard the Imperial-II Class Frigate Chrome Fox. Your Captain is Rocketman, and the ship itself is part of Taskforce Aurek (my TF). Head on over to the 2nd Fleet Discussion topic in our main Navy comnet to get familiar with our members. As it comes to the story- feel free to jump in. Our Taskforce is engaging the Imperial Remnant forces (ship list in the 1st page of the story). As a Junior Bridge Officer you should pick a station (Weapons, Communications, Shields, etc) on the bridge and man it. Focus on the tasks someone in that position would be expected to do, including receiving orders from Rocket and relaying info to him, etc. At your rank and position you can write out the destruction of the smaller ships of the enemy fleet, one per every post or two, but leave larger enemy ships and movements of our fleet to others.

-Drac

Sorry to leave you hanging, and welcome to the fleet! 

i'm ganna have to retire early, i'm afraid.  sorry fellas