Name - Robert 'Oops' Thrash

Callsign - Oops

Homeworld - Zerm

Age - 24

Species - Zabrak

Gender - Male

Skin - Well tanned from childhood on Zerm

Height - 1.88 meters

Hair - Dark Brown

Eyes - Purple

Handiness - Left Handed

Languages - Galactic Basic, High Galactic, Zabraki, and Apéne-as (Personal made up language for his religion)

In his own words:

All I remember is that I started off as a gangly twelve year old boy who kept banging into things, thus the nickname Oops.  And I spent way to much time in the bathroom doing what twelve year old Zabrak boys do until I grew up and then became a womanizer. I will leave the rest to your imagination. You do have one, don’t you? You do know what I’m talking about, don’t you?

I admit that there are times when even I question if everything that is happening to me is real, but isn’t this true of every one? Don’t we all question our identity? Don’t we all wonder at certain times if what is happening to us is real?

I think that’s why I spend so much time chasing after woman and having sex. I presume that is my subconscious mind trying to prove to me that I am real: that I’m a real man, that my attempts to become a prophet and have my own religion are not surreal.

Enough of these self doubts, I’m real and that’s the end of the discussion. I am just a genius who was put in this galaxy to deliver the ‘word’. I am the messenger. You better listen to what I have to say if you want redemption and salvation; that’s what I tell my flock.

I wish I believed everything I say. The truth is I’m not sure. I’m not sure I know what I’m talking about. I’m not sure I’m real. I’m not sure my ‘words’ of wisdom are the right ones. I’m confused. Can a guru and prophet in training be confused, or am I just a charlatan who is full of shit? I guess what happens next is going to help me find out. I hope it doesn’t involve having sex. I’m tired, of having to prove my existence this way.

The proof that I am real is the fact that you believe in me. You do believe, don’t you?

Pardon me for sharing my fears and doubts with you, but I am flying to Lotiath on a shuttle to try and gather members to my fold, first class of course, and I am bored. Even the stewardess doesn’t interest me. Wait a minute what is that crazy guy in the front of the shuttle doing? What is he waving? Is he trying to open the door? Oh my God, what is happening? I can’t hear anything. I guess I better take my earphones off. No one is listening to the holomovie anyway. What’s he shouting? This can’t be happening, not to me; I’m Robert Oops, I am a guru. I’m a prophet in training. This is not part of the plan.

I don’t believe it, now he is motioning to me to come sit up front. Why me, maybe it’s the white suit I’m wearing. This is part of my guru uniform, its not supposed to get me in trouble. There are only four other people in first class; three business executives, and a middle aged woman who introduced herself to me earlier as the head of a charitable foundation for the benefit of the families that survived the Ewok Massacre by the name of Sarah Dogood Little. The stewardess is cowering in fear in the last vacant seat in first class clutching the curtains tightly together that divide us from the common folk in coach so no one will see what is going on and panic. The pilot and co-pilot have locked themselves in the cockpit. I guess it is up to me to try and calm this maniac down, but why me dear God. Is this some kind of a test? I have to make a mental note to lose the white suit.

So here I am negotiating for the safety of a shuttle-load of people with a human named Abig Boobias, a member of a radical Religious Sect who had been involved in a building bombing on Tadath, which killed, and wounded hundreds of people.

Abig told me, we soon became fast friends on a first name basis, that he was really a nice guy, but was protesting his Sect being discriminated against, and didn’t know why his ultra-conservative religious Sect had developed a reputation as an aggressive and barbaric terrorist organization. I told him not to worry, that I had the answer to his Sect’s problems, and it didn’t involve killing a shuttle load of people by opening the door of a shuttle in vacuum.

I then spent the remaining two and one half hours of our flight trying to get Abig Boobias to get his people to admit to the error of their ways and adopt my religion, Dialectic Materialism, and to get him to take his hand off the shuttle door handle. I told him how if his people would start to make commerce and acquiring wealth the focal point of their religion, they would start to get the recognition and social standing in the Galaxy that they craved. I told him they needed to join souls with their enemies by touching each other in their very private essentials, no matter if this was on a physical or emotional level. I told him it was the thought that counts. I told him that if he and his Sect embraced Dialectic Materialism, the people of the Galaxy would eventually embrace them

After about two hours, Abig broke down crying, took his hand off the shuttle door and embraced me saying he believed and was saved. We stayed locked in that embrace until we landed. My God... he smelled of garlic. I don’t know if that was part of his religious ritual or just a late lunch before we took off that went wrong, but either way I made a mental note to outlaw the use of garlic by my flock. I wonder if Agig Boobias was trying to ward off evil spirits and ended up with me.

Promptly upon landing, the shutle was boarded by four ISB agents and members of a special anti terrorist squad who immediately arrested and handcuffed Abig and me. That’s right, that’s what I get for doing a good deed and saving the shuttle single-handed. It took six hours and the sworn testimony of the stewardess and the three businessmen to convince the authorities that I was not part of a terrorist plot, and to prove me innocent. Starport security admitted that they always profiled men in white suits, but never those in white turbans, which Abig was wearing. The woman who was head of the Ewok Massacre Survivors Relief Society refused to testify in my behalf claiming that it was people in white suits that had gotten her beloved Ewoks in trouble in the past. What did she mean by that? I made a mental note to outlaw good deeds, and white suits as part of the credo of Dialectic Materialism.

Unfortunately I couldn't just be let go, the Empire made my arrest such a big thing and whatever that I had to serve some sort of punishment.  So I am home now in some shuttle again.  This time it is only me and two armed guards, and a pilot.  I tried making conversations with the two men but they seem mute and deaf.  Perhaps even blind as any attempt at gestures were ignored.  And those berets, ugh, berets are outlawed from Dialectic Materialism as unfashionable.

And so now I am trying to steel myself for my next adventure. I don’t know what it is yet, but I have a feeling it has something to do with the Navy, or is it the color blue? You can take my ‘word’ for it that 'navy' is involved. I am the messenger, and I know these things.

Oh wonderful, I get to join the ranks of the Navy as a pilot, perfect.  God must be looking out for me, as I will never have to get on a shuttle again if I can pilot myself around.  Oh and Abig was executed by a firing squad for treason.  I am thankful that I could convert him to Dialectic Materialism before his end, he is in a better place now.

Welcome to the Vast Empire Imperial Navy, Oops.
I am C-3PX2, I am a Vast Empire Imperial Naval Academy (VENA) Operator.

By posting here you have completed Imperial Initiation (II), the first step of your Basic Training (BT). The Next step in Basic Training is Flight School, the Final Phase of Basic Training. The first step in Flight School is Chapter 1: Character Development. This is where you create the biography for your character. Since you completed the Biography on your character, it will be reviewed by a staff member of the VENA, after which they will move you on into the next section of Basic Training.

After which is the next step in Flight School, Chapter 2: Pilot Procedure. This is where you learn about the equipment that a pilot carries and the tactical situations you may face. Also there is the Defensive and Offensive Maneuvers assisngment, which will also be reviewed by a VENA Staff Member, who will then move you onto Chapter 3 of Flight School.

If you have any confusion, writers block, or problems with any of this just let any VENA Staff Member know, you can get in contact with a VENA Staff member though a Com-Net Private Message (in the message center), e-mail, or in IRC (using MIRC, the Java Client, or whatever program you use). Any way of communication works, and we would be more than happy to assist you if have any questions or concerns.