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Topic:  Malzious' Biography
Malzious
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  Malzious' Biography
August 26, 2006 10:14:21 AM    View the profile of Malzious 
Physical Appearance

Native Language: Basic.
Hair Color: Very dark brown, almost black.
Eye Color: Hazel, with a black ring around the Iris.
Skin Color: White.
Height: 6'2
Weight: 160 lbs
Age: 20
Full Name: Malzious D'zar
Physical Build: Musclar body form, large biceps.
Homeworld: Dantooine.


Talents/Skills

1)    Trained in Teras Kasi [A martial arts form, taught by the Jedi.]
2)    Can speak in Tatooinish and Hutese, as he was brought up in Tatooine from the age of Three.


Background History

I was six when my parents died, I was too young to remember was how or why, but only that it was in the lush forests of Dantooine. He remembered his Mother assuring him she would be back for lunch, and that they were going to have Tauntan chops with a special treat, Ruby Bliels, Malzious' favourite. But she never came back, I waited and I waited, no-one came, no Mother, no Father.

It was the next day when the man came, he was wearing a long brown Tunic and he took me to Tatooine, where I met my Aunt and Uncle, Secro and Aria. They were distant, I was never told of them by my Mother nor my Father. They taught me Tatooinish and Huttese which I learnt by the time I was nine. Secro had Jet-Black hair, short and he wore a tunic that reached his ankles, his eyes were Silver, I remembered gazing into them the day I was taken. Aria had light brown hair, it sank way down to her hips, she wore elegant dresses and had pretty brown eyes.

Nine years later
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The troops swarmed through the dunes of Tatooine to find me, as if searching for me. The Imperial army was at its peak, millions of troops free for them to deploy whereever they wished. It wasnt long before they reached our house, Secro told me to hide in the cupboard, which I did. I could hear them talking.

"Comprehend, where is the boy?" A trooper said.

"I am affraid I do not understand you, what boy?" Secro asked. Aria was standing close behind him listening to the troopers trying to batter information out of her husband. Secro turned his head, scanning around the room, he paused looking at the cupboard, gaxing into my eye staring from a small crack. His silver eyes gilmered in the dim lit light of the house, he quickly turned his head back to teh trooper. I was 15, not fully aware of what was happening with the Rebellion, only that there was a war.

The trooper raised his fire arm, aiming towards Secro's head. "Where is the boy?" The trooper asked.

"I don't know.." Secro answered, in the blink of an eye the trooper planted a laser right through his forehead, in an instant my Uncle was dead. Aria fell to her knees mourning over Secro's newly coming death.

"Search the area, we must find the boy!" The same trooper commanded.

"Yes Sir." The other troopers replied. The troopers searched high and low, trying to find me, at last one found me, hiding in the cupboard. I planted a kick in his jaw. he fell to the ground as I had hit a pressure point, I picked up his E-11 Blaster rifle and shot him in the head twice. The other troopers, six of them came running to were they had heard the fire. I managed to shoot two of them, the first in the arm and the chest, the second in the head.

"Get him, he must not die!" The trooper said. At this the remaining four troopers ran at him, without having time to react, they grabbed me and took me to an Imperial Star destroyer.

It was then they took me away to Endor to start my training. Ever since I have been training there day in day out to become a Storm Trooper.
 
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[VE-Army] Private Malzious
Kanderin Draken
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Kanderin Draken
 
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  RE: Malzious' Biography
August 27, 2006 5:31:15 AM    View the profile of Kanderin Draken 
Heh, nice writing skills Malz, your almost better than me

But im a little unsure on one thing, you are saying you were forced to join the Imperials?
 
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Private First Class Kanderin Draken
-=Wraith Squad=-
Wraith Squad Motto: When staring in the face of death we see our reflection

ASL/PFC Kanderin/4SQD/1PLT/1COM/1BAT/VEA/VE/

Now! This is it! Now is the time to choose! Die and be free of pain, or live and fight your sorrow! Now is the time to shape your stories! Your fate is in your hands! - Auron, FF X
Malzious
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  RE: Malzious' Biography
August 27, 2006 11:19:37 AM    View the profile of Malzious 
I was discovered to be very powerful, etc. etc. so they wanted me therefore raided my house, kille dmy uncle, took me forcebly made me do the training and I grew to like the authority of a storm trooper etc. etc.
 
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[VE-Army] Private Malzious
Cosmic
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  RE: Malzious' Biography
August 27, 2006 2:53:28 PM    View the profile of Cosmic 
I only read the first two paragraphs (part of the second paragraph). The creativity thus far is good, but you need to keep our timeline in mind. We are currently in the Thrawn Era, approximately 10-12 years after the events of Return of the Jedi.

The Jedi are no more. They have been totally wiped out by the Jedi Purge which took place during the Clone Wars. In other words, you could not have learned a martial arts form that was taught by Jedi because the Jedi have been extinct for many, many years. Second, a man in a brown robe (who I'm assuming is supposed to represent a Jedi) cannot exist either.

There are still people out there in the galaxy that are Force-sensitive, but none that are trained in the Force. They have all been killed. Also, read up on some history before you start "making stuff up" about already-known planets. For example, there is no language called "Tatooinish". Be sure to read up on the planets before hand.


You can make your revisions, and then reply to this same topic with your updated, final draft. (Not an edit please, a reply).
 
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Cleric "Cosmic" Vor'soth
CoT/MG Cosmic/HCA-3/SL/Drill Squad/Tadath/VEA/VE
[OPE][OTH][OPA][EW1][CDS][IH][GS][LM][SoS][CRoM][CoH][PoC][MSM][SCP][SoA][IOC]
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Cleric "Cosmic" Vor'soth
SL/KPR Cosmic/Lion 1-1/Lopen/VEDJ/VE
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