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Author
Topic:  Garthy's bio
Garthy
ComNet n00b
 
Garthy
 
[VE-ARMY] Private
 
Post Number:  2
Total Posts:  4
Joined:  May 2006
Status:  Offline
  Garthy's bio
May 20, 2006 10:32:13 PM    View the profile of Garthy 
Garthy's bio

eye color:Yellow
hair color:Brown
weight:190
height:6'2
specialties: any projectile or laser weapon.
blood type: a
scars: claw marks
tats: a Phoenix on the back a Runknar the right arm and a SSD on the chest
languages: Basic, Falleen, Kathol, Hapen

My name is Garthy I grew up on Dantooine my parents went there to get away from the war. I knew how to use a carbine blaster at the the age of six. I could use armament at 12 I was a kath hound hunter on dantooine. I was the best on the planet at tracking so I also joined in on searches for bigger beast when I could as I was one of few who could track them me and my 3 friends,We were the only trackers on the planet I have been to every major system in the outer rim and i have a rep with most people in those systems.I am a ex- bounty hunter. I joined the imperials to help out a cause and cuz I felt it was the right thing to do.
I'm very strong and strong willed and I have a level head in the face of danger and it takes a lot to make me scared and panic. I'm also a good fist-cuff fighter I'm a xped in piloting most land craft and a few spaceships I'm also good with a vibrosword or vibroblade. I prefer a blaster though but i can use either a sword or blaster or bowcaste.

Detailed history

I was born on falleen prime was I raised there till the age of 4 then they came a group of jedi they were from the order of Kath or they said. They attacked alot of the people we took a transport to Dantooine were I was raised a hunter and tracker I was taught all about laser weapons and projectile weapons i was then able to pick my weapon of choice which was a blaster carbine.I was taught how to aim it by a weapons master who also a martial arts master. I was taught the ways of the fistcuffs and sword I can use any sword or blade my favorite is force pole also called shield blade as it is a blade and shield.

My favorite bounties were that of Jax Karrde and,Taalon Darsky. It was one of my longest bounty hunts. I had to chase him through Rebel space look for him on the marsh covered worlds in the Ando system. I got Taalon alive i used a stun stick moded to fire stun rays. Then i chased Jax through mine fields,swamps jungles ,and through jungles. I finally cuaght him on the planet Kathol Prime.
Which is currently Kathol Republic they have a weak navy almost
no army.


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greets,
    Garthy
[This message has been edited by Garthy (edited May 21, 2006 10:46:23 AM)]
[This message has been edited by Garthy (edited May 21, 2006 10:47:14 AM)]
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[This message has been edited by Garthy (edited June 22, 2006 12:48:02 AM)]
Cosmic
ComNet Marshal
 
Cosmic
 
[VE-ARMY] Major General
[VE-DJO] Krath Prophet(ess)
[VE-VEEC] Chief Editor
 
Post Number:  4602
Total Posts:  7772
Joined:  Sep 2000
Status:  Offline
  RE: Garth's bio
May 20, 2006 10:58:12 PM    View the profile of Cosmic 
I just read a few words and didn't bother reading anything else.

This isn't school, but it is a writting-based RPG, so your writing needs to be better. Watch the grammar and syntax. Read my sample bio: Cosmic's Biography - Also Used As An Example as a guide to how bios should be. There are also some other good ones out there, but the important thing to notice is that they all use cammas and periods. They have sentences.

Edit your bio and repost it in this topic.
 
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Cleric "Cosmic" Vor'soth
CoT/MG Cosmic/HCA-3/SL/Drill Squad/Tadath/VEA/VE
[OPE][OTH][OPA][EW1][CDS][IH][GS][LM][SoS][CRoM][CoH][PoC][MSM][SCP][SoA][IOC]
-----------------------
Cleric "Cosmic" Vor'soth
SL/KPR Cosmic/Lion 1-1/Lopen/VEDJ/VE
[VP][WoS2][KC1][SoY][EoP][OAK]
-----------------------
Garthy
ComNet n00b
 
Garthy
 
[VE-ARMY] Private
 
Post Number:  3
Total Posts:  4
Joined:  May 2006
Status:  Offline
  RE: Garthy's bio
June 8, 2006 1:00:53 PM    View the profile of Garthy 
Cosmic is my bio better now please reply and let me know.
             


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greetz,
    Garthy
[This message has been edited by Garthy (edited June 8, 2006 1:08:15 PM)]
Cosmic
ComNet Marshal
 
Cosmic
 
[VE-ARMY] Major General
[VE-DJO] Krath Prophet(ess)
[VE-VEEC] Chief Editor
 
Post Number:  4626
Total Posts:  7772
Joined:  Sep 2000
Status:  Offline
  RE: Garthy's bio
June 10, 2006 12:34:19 AM    View the profile of Cosmic 
I got to two sentences this time.

You need to keep an eye on your syntax and grammar. I don't bother reading anything that hasn't any effort put into it for making it look "pretty".

What you're sending me are various revisions, or drafts. You need to take the time to read your own post, check it for grammatical and syntactical errors, and then send me a final draft.

These are some of the things that I am seeing:

1) i instead of I

2) No cammas where there should be

3) No periods where there should be

4) Remove the horizontal lines - it makes the post wider than it should be on the ComNet, and thus your viewers are going to be having to move a horizontal scrollbar around just to read the next word in your text.


Proofread your posts before you submit them. This is an improvement over your last, but fix the grammatical and syntactical errors before reposting it again.
 
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Cleric "Cosmic" Vor'soth
CoT/MG Cosmic/HCA-3/SL/Drill Squad/Tadath/VEA/VE
[OPE][OTH][OPA][EW1][CDS][IH][GS][LM][SoS][CRoM][CoH][PoC][MSM][SCP][SoA][IOC]
-----------------------
Cleric "Cosmic" Vor'soth
SL/KPR Cosmic/Lion 1-1/Lopen/VEDJ/VE
[VP][WoS2][KC1][SoY][EoP][OAK]
-----------------------
Garthy
ComNet n00b
 
Garthy
 
[VE-ARMY] Private
 
Post Number:  4
Total Posts:  4
Joined:  May 2006
Status:  Offline
  RE
June 16, 2006 2:19:10 PM    View the profile of Garthy 
I failed grammar class
 
-----------------------
greetz,
    Garthy
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