Ok, I see you've been doing the other chapters, but lets slow down and work on your bio.
First off, details. They're essential. I need vital statistics (height, weight, age, hair color, eye color, gender, scars, age, etc, but not limited to those or that particular order)
Your appearance HAS to be known. What does your character look like? How does he walk? How does he stand? Is he tall and lean, or short and fat? Describe him here. Once again, details.
As for your personality, no Force. That's one of the cardinal rules of the VE. The Force can only be mentioned and used by Dark Jedi Order members, and even then they don't do it very darn often, if at all. I would like more details here, such as how your character would react in certain situations, does he have friends, relationships? How does he feel about taking a life? Develop him, make him REAL. He isn't some shadowy figure now, he's a Naval Pilot. One has to know a character to write about it, and that rule is only that much more important if the character is your own.
As for your history: details. I know it gets old, but you need to explain how, why, when, and where he grew up, found the VE, joined the Navy. This can be as long as you want, but I need more.
You have a good start here. Now expand upon it. Make your character as real as you possibly can. Edit or repost
in this thread. No need to create another one. Do that, and I'll look over it again.
